So worried about my mother

I posted this in the nurse section, but I’m just beside myself with worry and would love to talk here on the general forums, too.

I’m here as I’m worried about my mother. About 10 months ago, she went to the doctor because she had a lump in her breast. The doctor examined it but said they didn’t think it was anything to be worried about, so didn’t send for a mammogram. In December, after I had a lump under my arm I was worried about, we sought advice from a nurse we knew. My mum mentioned she’d also had a lump in her breast to her, trying to reassure me it was fine and people just get lumps, but our nurse friend asked to feel it. She was surprised she hadn’t been sent for a mammogram as she said if she had been under her care, she would have been sent straight away, so naturally that was a bit alarming. My mother planned to go to the doctors again ASAP, but very shortly after seeing our friend, the lump just seemed like it had disappeared. She couldn’t feel it at all, in several different positions (standing, sitting, laying) so she didn’t go as there was nothing for the doctor to feel. After a few weeks it appeared to come back again however. She said that sometimes she feels it really easily and it’s really prominent, other times she struggles to find it, it seems like it shrinks, moves, or perhaps just disappears. It’s a fairly firm lump, I wouldn’t exactly call it squishy, but it’s not totally immobile. You can move it to some degree (not much, but it’s not completely rooted still), and you can press down on it a little too. It’s an oval shape, length wise probably anywhere between 3-5cm when you can feel it properly, and about 2cm up. She also said it always feels like it stings in that area and hurts when too much pressure is applied, even when she struggles to feel it, she said that’s how she knows if it’s still there. It appears to be pretty rounded, nothing seems to be sticking out in odd places. About 5 years ago, she hit her chest on a lawnmower that stalled, and shortly after that a large lump appeared in her breast. She went and had a mammogram for that and they said it appeared to be a cyst, but she’s not sure if it was the same breast as this one.

She went back to the doctors and is scheduled in for a mammogram next week, but I’m worried sick. It’s good it’s being checked, but I’m just beside myself with worry.

Hi Emmies,
As you say, it’s good it’s being checked out & the nurse was quite right on this.
Inevitably, waiting for an appointment is an anxious time & the mind does go into overdrive somewhat. However, your mum has done all she can & there’s nothing more to be done at the mo.
Honestly, most breast changes turn out Not to be bc & the vast majority of women who post here do not get a bc diagnosis.
Even, if on the off chance, your mum does get a bc diagnosis, then it’s certainly not the end of the world. Treatment is excellent now with recovery being the normal
outcome. Loads of us have been through this & are getting on with our lives as normal, but it’s most likely it won’t even come to that.
Do come back here if you need to chat or need more info, otherwise, it’s best not to google generally as it only feeds anxiety for no good reason.
ann x



I just wanted to echo everything that ann has said and especially that the majority of ladies who come on here having found a lump it does not turn out to be bc, but if it is then treatment is very good and there are lots of us on here who have been diagnosed that have successfully finished treatment and are getting on with our lives again. 


This is a wonderfully supportive forum so just keep coming on here and we will help you in whatever way we can, and stay away from Dr Google.


Sending you hugs xxx