Thanks Mary Grace really appreciate your reply, thats what i love about this site, u can log on and u instantly find someone whom understands you… thank u and love to u xx
Shar, course you are strong… doesn’t mean you’re not entitled to get completely and utterly hacked off with the whole thing!!! Moan away, whenever you need, it’s crap. Basically. All crap. There’s no medals doled out for suffering heroically/stoically/in silence, so forget the stiff upper lip when you’re on here, it’s not necessary.
xxxxx
Thanks Choccie, thats a good way to look at it, i like that. i will moan away, just cant believe how crap i have felt after fec2 with fec1 being ok after initial 24 hrs sickness, tiredness yes, but nothing at all compared to the tiredness of fec2. my period is due to and dunno whether to expect it or not…maybe my hormones are joining in everything else in my body. like u said earlier,tho at least Zeyna had some walks today but boy did it take some effort… keep reading threads about people having a drink, alchohol i mean, urghh, this time last week i was indulging but this week, no way, and next week its my birthday and i wanna fogot it this year, oh no im moaning again lol xxxxxxx
I completely ignored my birthday this year, a few days after FEC1. I had a dentist’s appt for one daughter and a doctor’s appt for another, and when my lot asked what I wanted for my birthday I said I wanted them to ignore it completely. They didn’t totally follow my wishes (got breakfast in bed that was edible, cooked by the uncookyiest daughter on the planet who could burn a kettle of water if she put her mind to it!) but on the whole, I did NOTHING to mark it, as I don’t like birthdays at the best of times and this sure as hell AIN’T the best of times.
But not everyone’s as much of a grumpy cow on birthdays. You and your OH might be able to do something special but quiet for your birthday, no big deal, perhaps a nice meal (if your mouth’s up for it), or even just a film from the local Blockbuster and a bag of chips on the sofa with a sloppy kiss or two from the dog who loves you whatever you look like and however rubbish you feel. Don’t you just love dogs?
Off to the beach tomorrow after a complete waste of a day full of disappointments today. Swimming costume packed (portacath, I love you!) and shortie wetsuit because this IS England after all, and I think I even have a silicone swimming hat somewhere but just to prevent sunburn. And suncream, and sloppy t-shirts to go over the top of things. But I do intend topping up on Vitamin D and having a nice barbecue and a jolly day - baldness, chemo skin, chemo mouth and farts (put together because my mouth TASTES like fart sometimes. Yuck.) extra weight and general ugly feelings notwithstanding.
Off to bed soon, bottle’s empty and I’ve taken most of the “off” away from the “p**sed off” that I was feeling earlier, leaving me, well, a little bit tipsy. Yeah, I know, I shouldn’t drink, it’ll give me cancer. Ha bleedin’ ha.
Hey, listen, could one of you please do me a favour? Can someone PLEASE SHOOT the miserable cow that’s taken up residence in my tent? I really don’t like her and I’d like her to just bugger off please and let me have my usual self back.
Normal CM-mode should be resumed after a good night’s sleep, the last of the cheeky little French red and a serious word with myself.
Sweet dreams fellow campers, and I hope my solo violin practice for Twisted Nipple in the function room above the Jingling Merkin hasn’t spoiled your evening’s frivolity.
Silverhar, glad to see you back up & about. Like you I have found fec2 so much harder than the first. I felt like telling them to stick the rest of the treatment, but after 9 days I came out the otherside, just hope no3 is better. I have had my first glass or two of wine today since dx in jan, & it tasted nice:). Have a relaxing sunday everyone xx
OK, so I’m away for a day and I have five pages of posts to read - you’ve been busy!
Had a bit of a marathon day today - went from home this morning at 8am (near Bedford) to take son to an open day at Gloucestershire University at Cheltenham. Never been there before - lovely place and he thought the course was great too so it’s number one at the moment. Then went from there to his friend’s house near Lincoln to drop him off for the week, then back home at 10pm. So that’s one huge triangle and about eight hours of driving. We saw some beautiful parts of the country though and the weather was gorgeous, so it was actually a really nice day.
On the subject of white cell boosters and aches, I was in dreadful pain after my Neulasta jab this time - I could barely stand let alone walk and I felt as though I’d got mumps. I had to take the maximum doses of ibuprofen and codeine (which of course had other side effects…) and I felt as though I’d got mumps. I know Tax also causes aches though so I’m not sure which was really to blame. I’m really not looking forward to Tax 2 on Wednesday.
SB, I’m picturing you on the beach - don’t care what you look like - it would be a lovely place to go at the moment! I’ve got the most dreadful drippy nose as well and it also bleeds a bit. It starts getting bad about 10 days after chemo. My onc is prescribing me Beconase spray for next time which she says will help and will also help with the sore eyes. I can also take antihistamines as well. I wish I had shares in Kleenex as I’m sure I’m bumping up their annual profits no end.
Jane xxx
Alto, rub some vaseline in your nose. It works wonders! I had the same problem, and it had got worse on Tax. My chemo nurse suggested the vaseline. It was like a miracle…
Just been reading earlier posts.
TSR I have those shelac nails done too, our salon calls them gel nails. I have taken vanity to a new height on friday when I had my toes done too. Its a must when you are on Tax. It has really helped the condition of my nails. Righty ho then, form an orderly queue in the Spa tent
x sarah
Glad you’re ‘back’ Shar. Moan away, it’ll do you good. You may find that things level off a bit now, though when you’re feeling awful that’s not much comfort. When I had a bad sore throat and laryngitis a few weeks ago, the Onc said that it’s a frequent SE, evenot necessarily an infection. And people have complained about runny noses on other threads as well. It’s such a pity when people like you who have really lovely hair lose it to chemo. I moan enough and I just had fine straight hair going grey.
Warm sweet drinks are a traditional way to soothe bad throats, remember. And you can always top them up with some your choice of strong stuff for bedtime. Ginger wine with hot water isn’t bad for colds and sore throats, either.
Let’s hope for more sunshine today and that everyone can get out in it at least for a little while. I’ve got DD2 with me for a bit this morning and DS may stop by in the afternoon, so that’s a good start to the day
Cheryl
Oh TRAUMA! My baby boy is turning 13 today, but is on a school trip for the week, in the Canary Islands. My poor umbilical cord is being pulled to it’s maximum! Clingy mummy!
CM, have a lovely time at the beach today. Sounds fantastic! Do you feel better today?
Shar, what about you? I was trying to find something to wear for my husbands birthday earlier in the month. I came across the dress I wore this time last year, when he turned 40. It is a clingy, low cut silk number. Which of course meant that firstly, I could not get my arm sufficiently high to struggle into it. Having got it on, it confirmed that it was low cut enough to reveal my mono-breasted cleavage. Then as I tried to smooth down the skirt, over my chemo belly, I caught sight of myself in the mirror. Was it you Peachez, who drew comparisons to pantomime dames on another thread?? Well, I have been to several pantos, all with much more attractive dames, than the one that stared back at me from the mirror. What a lot has changed in a year. Birthdays eh?? Grumble, grumble, grumble…
Tracey
morning all
well the deadly grip of filgrastim jabs has finally lifted - only 48hours later- and the fog of fec5 is more of a mist.
im off to my mums place by the river severn where hopefully the kids will be distracted from all of this rubbish. last night was terrible: me and kids in bed all crying, it was like a scene from some melodramatic soap. horrid and surreal- how can a family turn into this so quickly. i have to admit to my shame) that at times like that i wish BC on everyone and any ‘christian’ thoughts are replaced by nasty wishes to behold on all. not my best moments.
but today is today and all gremlins can f off. i might not be capable of firing my flamethrower but im hoping that the look on my facee will make them back off.
have a good day wooders. xxx
Oh SCACO, I have a special place in the depths of chemo hell reserved for a couple of very special people, and I would quite happily see them stay there and rot forever…
As for family snots n tears… it’s a damn sight healthier than family combined stiff upper lip, imo. Messier, but healthier. And I’m sure with red eyes and black circles, any gremlins will keep well back.
Or is it just me that looks utter cr*p after a night of wailing? You’re going to tell me now that you’re one of those 50’s film stars who look even more beautiful once they’ve wept gracefully, elegantly and with no snot. Oh poo.
have a good day today - enjoy the sunshine, and your mum’s company and pampering… just don’t get bitten by midgies and mossies if you’re by the river!!
Sophie xx
TSR - ahhhhh! Happy birthday to your new teen! Of course you miss him, that’s ok. If it all gets too much, just concentrate on how bad teenage boys’ feet smell. And that they never bring plates/cups down from their bedroom. Or put laundry in the laundry basket, until you’ve completely emptied it and think you’ve got to the end of it all and then turn round and find that there is enough there to fill the washing machine six times over and he wants it all by tomorrow morning including his rugby/football/hockey/cricket socks which are so stiff and smelly that you almost have to break them to fold them into the machine.
Then you might just be able to hold on til he comes home. With all his washing from a week away. xxxxxxx
TSR, yes Mrs Panto Dame here; added Mrs Potatoe Head to that this morning - draw on eyebrows never the same, stick on T*ts, various ‘headwear’ etc etc, could be a different person every day…
Alto: just wanted to say I was dreading TAX2 like you, but so far has not been quite so bad, ONLY got leg aches and tight throat and swollen tounge feeling with lardy mouth !! maybe forwarned is forarmed and all that, but not quite so wiped out. Skin on hands and toes is peeling still from last dose.
They did miss getting the very last very few ml into me because of a problem with the drip line, but can’t think that so little less would make a difference?
All these people off to sit next to rivers/sea in the sun for the day! Sounds just the thing to lift the spirits. Must get to one of those fancy shops to get a mastectomy costume and swimming t*t (to add to my collection).
Don’t forget the insect repellent too.
Scaco, sorry you had a bad night, sending magnifying glass so you can catch the suns rays and burn any bl**dy germlins into smoke !!
Ah, Trip, Sage as always. You are right of course. He will bring home his case, having worn just one pair of clean pants, and the same t shirt, with aforementioned items, and indeterminate food stuffs and other debris, rammed on top of the ‘clean’ washing. The case will then lie in the hall for two days, until I finally give in, and empty it myself…
Still miss him though!
If mine were away, I’d prob miss them too. Does anybody want them so I can find out?
Morning all campers!
Hope all those off to parts coastal and rivery have a lovely day. MG you be careful in that bikini in the garden, you don’t want to be too irradiated before starting the real ones!!
TSR, enjoy the missing of him! When he’s 30 and still doing that with his washing you will look back and sigh!!!..
Trip, have had my own, they have ostensibly flown the nest and I absolutely do not want to borrow anyone else’s even if it were for a fellow bc chum!!
Peachez you are NOT a PANTO DAME, repeat after me!!
Anyway hope all have a lovely se free day and get their Vit D boosts!
Wandyx
… I am not a Panto Dame
… I am not a Panto Dame…
Thata girl Peachez!!
Wandyx
Actually, thought the Mrs Potato Head was very good! Sums up how I feel. Am lying on my bed, with the view of my iPad screen being blocked by my softie boob, as the other one (the 41 year old one) slides wearily into my armpit.