start of what seams a very long road

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after doing a routine self check of my breasts I found a lump on 25th may 2014… Waited a week due to hormones etc and booked with the nurse to checkout the lump on 2nd June when I was sure hormones would b back to normal… Nurse also felt the lump and revered me to hospital. For more examinatios …my 1st appointment with specialists was 25th June.(just over 4weeks from me finding the lump 1st time)…

I had mamagrams… Scans and biopsy s that day and was sent away til results come back and my next appointment date 1st July…that seamed the longest week of my life. Filled with worry as I am a single parent with 2 young kids aged 5 @ 13…

My results on the 1st July were inconclusive so more mamagrams. Scans and biopsy s were taken and I was to return get again for more results…

I returned on the 7th July to be told that I did indeed have breast cancer… Biopsy of nodes were clear at the time… Cancer was def there grade 1. But they also found a mass sat right next to the cancer which they now call a binine tumour…we first disgussed a lumpectamy but because  the tumour was sat so close to the cancer itself and I am only little in boob size we opted for a mastectomy which is due to take place on the 24th July…

The constant worry of cancer spreading… Tumour. Becoming active and things spreading to lymph nodes are a terrifying thought for me as it been 9weeks from finding the lump until mastectomy date 24th July…

Surgeon said my cancer was a grade1 but no stage as yet…

I don’t sleep well. I am constantly consumed by fear of the cancer getting bigger whilst 9 weeks on still waiting for the cancer and tumour to b removed…and now my over active emagination has p!anted fears of the operation itself of being put to sleep for the mastectomy and not waking up again…:smileyfrustrated:

 

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Hi Tracy,

You’ve come to the right place for support, I’m quite new to this, and have had so much support from Breast Cancer Care in the last couple of months.

It’s perfectly normal to be very scared and worried, we all are when going through this.

And this time at the beginning, the waiting time, is the worst of all, it’s all examinations, scans, biopsies, results, more scans etc, every test result seems to indicate the need for another test and it does seem like a very long road to be on. It’s the most intense time but does settle down, and it’s normal to be at your most anxious when going through this.

Grade indicates how fast the cancer is growing. Grade 1 is the lowest grade so grade 1 is a good thing. I personally wouldn’t worry about a 9 week wait from finding a lump until it being removed, and I’m sure others on here will say the same, so try to stop worrying about that.

I had a mastectomy in June, and like you was terrified of the surgery, of not waking up. I can honestly say that it was ok - I did wake up! - in fact the worst part of it was the waking up feeling groggy. I didn’t have too much pain at all afterwards, and watched the world cup in the evening! It was done in day surgery, so I was home for 3:30 in the afternoon. Facing surgery is worrying but it’s a very routine thing, try not to worry too much about that.

I am a single parent too, do you have anyone to support you at the moment, and to give some practical help around the house after surgery?

The Breast Cancer Care helpline is marvellous - give them a call tomorrow, they have so much information and I always feel better when I’ve had a chat on there.

I’m sorry you’re going through this at the moment, but you’re not on your own, you’re part of quite a big club now, lots of people to support you along the way.

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Hi Tracy
Your story sounds very similar to mine. Mine was also grade 1 but due to there being two tumours in two different quadrants of the breast, I had no choice but to have a mastectomy. A few weeks later, a sentinel node biopsy showed it present in one out of the two nodes removed… and so an axillary node clearance got thrown into the mix too.

I spent the majority of the time between diagnosis and surgery feeling like I was sat in a cell on death row, counting down the days till the dreaded op. You would have sworn it was the electric chair and not the operating table I was headed toward!

Fast forward a few weeks and I’m sat up in my hospital chair, eating roast pork with all the trimmings, with more cards, flowers and chocolates than can reasonably fit into a small single hospital room with the cancer all removed and a perky (albeit still rather swollen) reconstructed boob.

This is where you will be soon (although you may prefer a different menu choice to roast pork!) The wait is horrible and our own imaginations are our worst enemies. Be reassured that grade 1 is the slowest growing and isn’t going anywhere fast in the meanwhile and that once you’ve been knocked out under anaesthetic, you’ll be hooked up to every machine known to mankind designed to monitor your every breath and heartbeat along with a team of people whose job it is to make sure you are safe and well. My anaesthetist told me when I voiced my fears about the self same thing “I’ve been doing this job for 11 years and I’ve never had a patient not come round”

No point in telling you not to worry… because that’s what we’re good at. Just take one day at a time and before you know it, you too will be on the other side wearing your surgical stockings and eating dubious hospital food!

Hugs. Mel

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Hi Tracy,

 

I can fully understand your worry about having to wait.After finding my tumour, I didn’t tell anyone for 7 weeks.  I was diagnosed on November 1st 2012 but didn’t have surgery until December 12th, a period of 7 weeks and 41 days. I had mastectomy and sentinal node biopsy. 3 nodes removed, 1 contained cancer. Grade 3. The stage won’t be known until after surgery - I was 2b. As you are a grade 1, which is slow growing, it is unlikely that it will reach more than grade 2, and probably not reach your lymph nodes.

 

As far as not waking up after surgery, the anaesthetist will be experienced enough to know how much anaesthetic to give you. You will have  a pre-op assessment shortly before your op, where they will check you height, weight, blood pressure, chest, and heart to ensure you are as fit as can be. I was 61 when diagnosed, with high blood pressure, RA, and Bronchiectasis with pseudomonas colonies among other things. I was fine for my op and woke up with no pain, just a bit of discomfort where the drain came out, just below the operation scar.

 

Sending hugs and best wishes

poemsgalore xx

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Hi Tracey

Bless you hun take a deep breath and try to relax, as has already been said on here this is a great place to chat, every one on here is here for the same reason as yourself wether it be at the start of finding the lump or those who have been through it and are here to reassure us and thankyou to everyone of you.  I have a grade 3 tumor and stage 1, I have no fear of the op what so ever having had 2 hip replacements in 2012 I am 64 in August and thinking of going on my holiday first for 3 weeks and delay my op till I get back.

 

 Hopefully you have family and good friends to help you after your op when I gather you might need it for a week or two, and if you have little ones you will need help 

 

Dinners in the freezer is always a good idea, and you can always have a chat on here, so sending big hugs do try not to worry to much we are all in good hands and nothing could be worse than that long wait before you get the results, finding it hard to breath tight chest stomach in knots laying in bed late at night thinking all sorts, but we will get rid in the end of this horrible cancer hugs 

Julie

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_ hi people. _

_ Thanks for your support… It really does mean a lot… Think I just need to get a grip to b honest… _

_ I read so many others posts and lots of women are dealing with same if not worse… It’s the fear of not knowing I guess… But logically we are all doing all we can… We are all meeting and fighting this nasty disease head on and prepared to fight the fight… _

_ Being on this site and reading replys off you ladies really does give me hope and support when its needed the most… _

_ And in time as more women join this site I hope to return the hope and support that I myself have been given… _

_ My op now is 11 days away and although very scared and physically sick thinking about it I really cannot wait for the day to come when they take this thing out of me .xxx _

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Hello Tracy… my story is a bit like yours in that I had everything done in one day after discovering a lump. But also had an inconclusive result, so repeat biopsy, (this one was negative), but the first had shown cancer in just one of the pieces of biopsy, so they had to look at the possibility of cross contamination, although the Dr’s have said this is almost not the case? So MRI breast scan on weds & results a week after. The waiting is just horrible & so many thoughts have been going through my head & the fear is indescribable. I don’t think you need to ‘get a grip’, you’re coping the best you can & we all handle this differently & I also think there’s worse than me, but at the moment this is our problem that we have to cope with and it’s scary. Thinking of you for your op xx

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Finally have my pre op date… This wed thank god… And surgery the week after and although the stress is driving me insane I so want this or both lumps out… At least then there will b some movement and some progress being made… Minutes can turn into hours with the waiting game… I feel for you ladies all in the same position as me… I am not 

 Know for my patients of waiting lol… Tryedbto persuade the nurse that when the op date comes I can go home but unfortunately they aren’t having any of it and at least a one night stay is on the cards.xx