Morning ladies. I havent beren on here for a while but have read all posts now and will comment on the ones I can remember! The reason I havent been on is that i have just been too tired, full of malaise and quite depressed. I had my final chemo on wed. i want to feel happy but am battling se’s at the mo .
Mom has taken a long time to settle at the rehab place - shes now on antibiotics for a chest infection. However she is now on the mend. wed was a significant day for her too - she was 95.
Last thursday was my MIL funeral. at last! finally my OH can now get closure.
well now comments!
Lisalou - i see a crazy eyed lady when I look in the mirror too. scary!
Border collies - i laughed out loud at your bra incident!
Lolly - hope youyre feeling better and enjoy that hol.
Cress - so you will be in Jersey now. I love that place. enjoy enjoy enjoy!
Mnady - hope youre feeling better now
Sand - thats crap news about the third member of yiur family having cancer. sending you a hug. and yes chemo makes everything smell odd. I opened all the windows this morning because i could smell onions. i hate onions and dont cook them at all. even the shower smelt of onions !
Mairie - Rome sounded fab.
sandy - definitely more shopping is required!!!
cybele - thanks for the info re tamoxifen . Have you managed to find out anything about rooibos tea if you oestrogen positive?
Sp - welcome
i think im up to date … going back to bed now methinks cos im knackered!
QD-just keep reminding yourself ‘it will get better’ and enjoy your duvet time if you can! Glad the funeral is over and that your mum is rallying.
Cressida-Enjoy Jersey. Hope you have a relaxing, restorative time.
Coyotegi-It’s great to have another one over the line! Hope the se’s are manageable.
Hamley-Hope you are recovering from last chemo. Your mx seems very soon but I suppose it’ll be good to get it all over with.
Today I’m getting herceptin no 5. Herceptin has been fine so far but getting more anxious about the vein finding every time. You’d think I’d be used to needles by now.
Mz and Cress-I know you are right about the Tamoxifen but I’m going to wait 2 more days and start on Sunday after my wee family party tomorrow. I’m hoping the chemopause and radiotherapy will buy me a few days. My oestregen was a 6, so moderately oestregen dependent. Might have to get one of those pill boxes with the days of the week because there is no way I’ll remember to take it every day. I struggle to remember what I’m talking about half way through conversations these days.
Before you all start talking about me or organising a face book style party at my house, I’m still here.
Jersey is a week away. The cold continues to get better and I have kept the drugging of my hubbie to the minimum for the time being. Night nurse was all it took last night. He may get more noticably whingy aver the weekend when he is not at work, so I am keeping the good stuff in reserve.
Very quiet. Hope you are all enjoying end of chemo. We still want to hear from you.
QD - hope you feeling a bit better. What a load of crap to deal with. I’m amazed how, once we have BC, the universe doesn’t just say “well, that’s enough sh*t for them to deal with, I won’t give them anything else”. But NO, life continues to throw sh*t at us. NOT FAIR. Well done on reaching last chemo. You can celebrate later. Impressed with your mum - you must have some of her genes for living a very long life, surely.
Reaching the end of one stage of active treatment is wierd - partly you think you should celebrate and partly you have time to think about how scary it is. You don’t have time to think about that when you are concentrating on surviving a treatment. Hang in there girl, and let us know how you are getting on.
Maire - enjoy the party. I’m sure a Scottish family gathering will be a quiet and civilised affair, so you will be early to bed and up bright and early tomorrow. I will be checking in to see if you have opened that box…
Cybele - I just love that Wisteria, I wish I had seen that earlier - I would def have taken that into the chemo suite with me. Next time I have to endure anything I will close my eyes and sit under that.
Cold update - improving in leaps and bounds. Still a bit sniffy. Hope to be well enough to meet Lolly on Monday. Any of the new ladies live near Bedfordshire? Very small meet up arranged on Monday. Very small indeed if my cold has not gone. It’s odd to be warning people to keep away from me in case they catch something.
good afternoon to you all,
just a quick one to say i am lurking about and trying to keep up with you all, i should come on here daily as cant remember where everyone is at, but looks like we are all nearing our end of the Chemo and looking forward to drug free at end of the month, I have managed so far to stay out of hospital, and seem to have gotten over most of the SE, except i had to go to doctors yesterday with sever painfull piles, god if its not one way it’s the other, been given cream and hopfully will be able to sit straight soon god what ever next will i have hopefully next FEC i will get over quick cant wait,
anyway take care all of you and hope to see Cress on Monday and anyone else who can join us.
I am really struggling at the moment. It’s day 9 after FEC6 and I still seem t o be in a state of complete physical and emotional collapse.
My arm hurts like b***ery inside, after having the last 3 doses of chemo int othe vein, and it’s not getting any better- if anything it seems to be hurting more over the last couple of days. The side effects this time have just been awful - the nausea the worst since the first cycle - and above all, else I am just so incredibly weak.
I keep melting down emotionally and bursting into tears. The end of chemo is having a much bigger emotional impact than I had anticipated, and the fact it has left me as this physical and emotional wreck makes me angry.
I just feel so completely and utterly battered, in every way. YThe 'I ‘ve finished!’ exhilaration has completely disappeared, replaced by sullen resentment and anger that FEC is still torturing me. I can’t snap out of it, and don’t imagine I will be able to until I start feel ing better physically. And that’s just not happening yet…
Cybele, you go ahead and moan, that’s what we’re here for. I had problems with my veins, particularly the one from FEC 2 in January which still uncomfortable now. It feels like the vein is hard and shortened especially when I turn my wrist. I mentioned it to the chemo nurse and she gave me some cream called Hirudoid Cream which does seem to help. Beware, if your sense of smell is in overdrive as mine is; it smells very strong but it’s worth it. Apparently the veins can take several months to feel better.
I know what you mean about the weakness; I felt like it should all be OK straight after FEC 6, but it’s taking me much longer to get passed the SEs, tiredness and physical exhaustion this time. As Cress has said, we must be kind to ourselves and time will do the rest.
Lolly, it’s nice to hear from you and I’m glad to hear you’ve managed to stay out of hospital this time, it must be a relief. Only one more to go, when’s your last cycle? I think that you may be the last out of our group.
Cress, fab to getting rid of the cold so well, that’s a novety on this thread. I wish I could join you on Monday, but Shropshire to Bedfordshore is a little too far.
QD, I hope your feeling better and your Mum too.
Maire, enjoy the party, have some fun for us too while you’re there.
My OH took me out for breakfast yesterday morning. We have a restaurant locally which is associated with the hotel next door and they’ve recently started to serve breakfast to non residents due to popular local demand. It was to celebrate the end of chemo and he took me as it was the first day I’ve woken up not feeling horrible. That cheered me up greatly, but I was shattered by the time we got home at 11am!
Cybelle - my doc once said to me, that the mind is a strange thing, it puts up with so much stress, but it’s when we get back to ‘normal’ that it retaliates, I suppose this explains the meltdowns we seem to be getting after the elation of the last chemo. Not something we were expecting!! Big HUGS to you, I know just how you feel, almost three weeks on now, and it has improved. The tatoos were fine, just a scratch and they were done, though I didn’t get my rose! one each side and one in the middle, they look rather like blackheads (nice?) spect in my case they’ll just disappear in another roll of fat!! The nurses were lovely in the rads unit, and the place itself was bright and cheerful. Have my date for starting as tghe 30th April. Still not sure if I’m doing the right thing, volunteering for this trial, bit worried that because of MX that it may be more sore than if just had lumpectomy. Will just wait and see how things go, can always drop out if things get too bad, but don’t really want to go down that road. Have next Herceptin on Thursday, this last 3 weeks seems to have flown by. Is no one else taking LETROZOLE instead of Tamoxifen? would like to know how you’ve got on with it. Hamley, that was a nice surprise being taken out for breakfast, it’s amazing how one minute you feel fine and the next shattered. I find often when I start climbing stairs that my legs suddenly feel like lead, maybe all chemo’s dropped down into them!! Lolly/Cress hope you manage to get together, make a toast to us all when you do. Maire, hope you enjoyed the party. QD, thought you’d been quiet for a while. Hope you’re feeling better. Nice for your other half to at last have closure, must have been hell waiting all that time. Good that your mum is settling, 95, that’s a milestone, brilliant!
Ok, party over-lots of singing and dancing. Have absolutely no idea when I went to bed- or rather- when I went to ‘couch’.
I have no more excuses and have popped the first tamoxifen. I am dreading this next part of the journey so much. Add to this my 5th Herceptin which I had on Friday and immediately afterwards had chest pains. Drat. Am going to have to tell them about that. I just hope it was a one off because I am really depending on that drug!
After popping the tamoxifen I had stomach cramps. But there is no way it could be thge tamoxifen already. I only took it 10 mins ago. I am going to be a complete nightmare about this.
Cybele-I think the fec is really tough on your veins. I only had the one and my arm is still sore over the vein from wrist to elbow. Recently I’ve noticed the discomfort easing. So that’s taken 4 months! Though I’ve mostly been ‘up’ since finishing chemo I’ve had some gloomy days. We’ve been through so much and it’ll probably years before I, personally, will be able to put it all behind me
hi girls Day 5 post LAST EVER BLUMIN CHEMO and i cant see straight and am knakered! My picc line has gone but because I had all my chemos in one vein it hurts. Supposed it would really. scan 25th apr to see what stage mr lumpy is at at and then i meet the surgeons on 29th should be chopped up sometime in may. funtimes!!!"
Maire - glad to hear youve started on the tamoxifen. its gotta be done love!
Hamley - what a lovely treat ! go and have another
Cressida - ta for your kind words. Hope the cold is dissipating!
Lolly - good luck for the last one!
i feel very quilty. My son has had an offer from every uni he applied to. hes goiung to University of Wordcs to do primary school teacher training. Im jealous. When my daughter goes back to school tomorrow she will be into her gcse exams .im jealous. Is this totally irrational? it just seems that life is going on around me. dont get me wrong i dont begrudge my kids anything and want them to succedd but i cant help it - im jealous!
Maire & Cybele - you have both talked about painful veins from having FEC and you both seem to have had the canula put in the hand/wrist area. I’m interested only because I had all six FEC straight into the vein but my nurse always used the vein in the crook of my elbow where they usually do a blood test. I have had no pain or discomfort whatsoever with my veins and I wondered if the fact that it was in the elbow was the reason. Maybe others can tell us how theirs was given. Eighth Rad tomorrow and by Tuesday week I’ll be finished (unless they’ve got any surprises for me). Certainly feeling a lot better - I’ll be five weeks post FEC tomorrow but still have mouth dryness. Eyes are improving but still get sore and red if I do too much close work. Hair is growing and beginning to fill in all the thinnest bits. Find that I do get tired quickly. Can do all my normal activities but once I sit down my eyelids feel like lead and I’m gone. Mind you I think I’ve still got rads fatigue to look forward to. We are all slowly getting through it. Back in November I just couldn’t picture nearing the end of all the treatment that then lay ahead of me but I’m nearly there. Hope all of you still having chemo are managing the dreaded s/e’s and those having rads - keep slapping on the cream! Good luck too for all those about to have surgery. It’s been an abso-blooming-lutely wonderful sunny warm day here in Kent and I’ve discovered the garden again after all the rain. Sitting in the sun does wonders for the way you feel. Hope it was sunny where you were.
Hi Sparklers like most of you I have finished my six sessions of FEC. Brill feeling not having to go to that dreaded suite again. Like you Cybele I suffered extreme fatigue. The chemo nurse recommended I take a daily dose of spa tone which is a liquid iron supplement. This has really helped me I actually did some tidying up in the garden! I also have damaged veins each time they had so much trouble finding a vein in my right arm. They used my left arm on a couple of occasions which is the side of my mx and lower lymph gland removal so I now have pain in that arm just hope lymphodema doesn’t kick in. Physio suggested massage from wrist upwards this is helping.
I thought that was me finished with treatments but oncologist said on my last treatment that she was referring me for rads. This came as a complete shock as I was originally told I could not have rads as I had them 17 years ago After lumpectomy Apparently they want to treat the nodes in my collar bone area. Do I have it or not not sure what SE will be if any. I also have to take lextrozole for five years. I took this prior to my mx it did give me hot flushes again and muscle aches but not to bad. has anyone had rads on collar bone area if so how was is.
sending hugs to all still suffering post chemflex
Border Collies,
I was told at the beginning that the chemo can’t be given in the crook of the elbow. bloods are taken from there, but the nurse said that there is an increased risk of leakage (or at least I think that is wha she said). Was there a particular reason why yours started in the crook? Interested as I still have another four to go. Thanks.
Cassowary I was never given any reason why my chemo was given in the crook of the elbow - just that there was a “good” vein there and I never felt the chemo being pushed in. Was also on a drip all the time but I expect that is usual. I’m having my treatment privately so I was in a room with just me and the nurse and didn’t get to see any other way of doing things. They did say that if the veins in my arm became difficult they would do it through the leg. I’ve never experienced any discomfort, soreness or pain in my veins. I had FEC 75 chemo and the same vein was used each time. Never had any leakage although they did use specially shaped plasters to go right around the canula but there again I expect that is the norm.
Feeling a bit fed up cos I had to cancel meeting Lolly for her safety as I am still sniffing and coughing. Weedy immune system is rubbish. To be fair to it, it is trying to fight off a cold and a very serious case of cellulitis less than 2 months after stopping chemo. The arm movement, by the way, is dramatically improving. I couldn’t get in a radiotherapy position, but I can do a cheery wave, should it be called for (not that I feel very f*cking cheery) .
Have my Onc appntmnt tomorrow. I have the feeling that the system is about to spit me out. No more treatment for Triple Negative me. This is quite alarming as my “normal” life is long gone. Somehow have to pull myself together and start constructing a new life. Thought it might be time to post this again, as I certainly need to re-read it.
Qd-Fingers crossed for you for your scans and surgery. Really hope Mr Lumpy is a shadow of his former self.
Bc-All my drugs have been given via veins in the back of the hand. At one point they tried to give it via a vein below my thumb. That was bl**dy sore. The nurses did say they could move up my arms if need be. Not sure why they don’t try that first but they must have a good reason.
Today has been a ‘back to reality’ day for me. Tamoxifen no2 has been popped and its been back to work after the Easter holidays.
I went back to balloons and bunting to celebrate my 50th which was very cheering. I’m now more than 9 weeks post chemo and almost 3 weeks post rads. I think I feel just about back to normal-apart from the baldness! If I start to feel rubbishy I will def be able to say its the Tamoxifen.
I intend to hang about here to report on life on the other side and to cheer you all on…and of course there’s that summer Christmas party to look forward to.
Cressida-Please don’t let your onc fob you off. He/She better have a reassuring plan of action for you!
Is no one else taking LETROZOLE instead of Tamoxifen? would like to know how you’ve got on with it. Hamley, that was a nice surprise being taken out for breakfast, it’s amazing how one minute you feel fine and the next shattered. I find often when I start climbing stairs that my legs suddenly feel like lead, maybe all chemo’s dropped down into them!! Lolly/Cress hope you manage to get together, make a toast to us all when you do. Maire, hope you enjoyed the party. QD, thought you’d been quiet for a while. Hope you’re feeling better. Nice for your other half to at last have closure, must have been hell waiting all that time. Good that your mum is settling, 95, that’s a milestone, brilliant!