Just a quickie as gone to bed with hottie, feeling like s***t.
dont know what’s worse mouth, aches, shivers, shi**s, this blessed tax is certainly giving me a run for it with my last one!!! but it won’t win, I will get through it now where are those meds to help me?
just wanted to say a big good luck to everyone getting chemo or bloods this week. Sandra you tomorrow will be joining us in the car park yippee!!
Funki I am tired too but my problem is I fight it which I must stop, hence going to bed at 7.30 French time!!
nite all and here is to all the horrid se going soon xxx
Chris yes my mouth is very dry too. its that feckin FEC its got progressively drier after each dose. ive found chewing gum helps, also helps with foul taste and slimy feel to my teeth.
x Yvonne
Hi Gill,
I don’t know if this is significant or not, but I am on 6 cycles of TAX with Carboplatin and Herceptin. I’m not having any FEC at all. My TAX doseage is the standard one for my regime and is at 75%. I did ask about possible reductions after my first cycle when I was very neutropenic, which frightened me to death. He said no, that is the last resort only.
My mouth is also dry, but improves when I mouthwash with water!
Good luck today Sandra…XX Im Grumpy again spent over an hour on the loo last night constipated,everything that would help with it just makes me feel sick with the thought of taking it,Achy,tired and fed up,catch up later…xxx hugs to all…x
Day 14 Tax 3
morning all , hope we are all coping with our SEs , I don’t think I’ve had a pain free day since my ANC/WLE on Dec 28th , I’m getting fed up & can’t wait until the day I wake up & feel normal again !
my eyes won’t stop watering they are red raw ! My legs ache & throb & I’ve still got that sickly feeling , personally I was floored with cycle 5 &dont feel like I’ve pulled through . Now I’ve also found myself constantly saying " I’m still poorly you know " or similar , it’s as though I’m constantly reminding OH & little one that just cos chemo has ended doesn’t mean I’m better but I’m even getting on my own nerves , I coped better when I was having chemo !!
Sorry to moan !! I used to be so positive & upbeat but my get up & go has got up & gone !! Think I’m being impatient expecting to feel better too soon !!
I’m just trying to get my head around a healthier diet & light exercise , last night was pondering on yoga & salads etc whilst eating a bag of kettle chips & my filling fell out !! Dentist today just to improve my mood !
Anyway I hope my cheery , positive post has really made everyone feel upbeat ( sorry !! )
take care everyone
karen x
Morning ladies. Couldn’t post here over the weekend cos stupid here forgot to take my login password and I couldn’t remember it!
Good luck today Sandra. How great that we’re getting to the end at last.
My weekend away was lovely. I made the very best of early SE free TAX. It doesn’t seem to affect me, other than giving me steroid bounce, until day 5 or 6. We set off back in good time yesterday as it was pouring with rain. Good job too cos by the time we got home I was shattered. I had a soak in the bath and spent the evening comatose on the sofa. Steroids have worn off. Juzzshing head and bone aches seem to have got a hold as I had a pretty poor nights sleep.
My mouth is really off now. I can only describe it as if it’s been bleached. Just like if you get bleach on your fingers, all slimy. My taste has goon right off but I spent the night craving toast and marmalade!
Karen, I’m sorry that your having to struggle with your OH on top of everything else. This experience has made me very grateful for mine. Yes, we’re a bit boring and maybe not quite loves young dream anymore but then being married to a true friend can’t be all that bad can it?
Paula, like you, the thought of taking tablets to overcome yet more SE’s is horrid but I have to admit the latest additions my Onc gave me have made all the difference (Sodium Docusate for stool softening and Lansoprazole for indigestion).
Hope everyone has a good day. I’m going to have to nod off again now. Exhausted still.
MMM xx
Can I just ask has anyone had dental treatment ( a filling ) after chemo , do u think it is ok by day 14/15 ?
Thanks x
karen one of my huge back fillings fell out during first cycle and i went to dentist to get it fixed. never thought about it at the time but when i mentioned it in passing to onc he wasnt happy. that was when it really hit home about being super careful about possibilities of infection. you should be ok by now but make sure dentist is aware you are having chemo.
x Yvonne
Karen, day 14 of Tax is when your bloods should be improving, but if it isn’t bothering you unduly, it won’t take harm by leaving it a day or two, and you can keep it clean with mouthwash presumably???
Whatever, I would speak to your onc first and ensure your dentist knows you are only just past your chemo infusion.
FEC5/6 d9
Morning Vals,seems we are all struggling along with various se’s.
Thanks Kath and Chicita re dry mouth,feel like I should be on a permanent saline drip to plump me up.Turning into a prune.
Glad you had a lovely weekend Mandy,makes all the difference.
I feel fine today after my day on sofa,thank goodness.Friends and cousin visiting,I don’t know about the rest of you,and I really do appreciate seeing them and their support,BUT,why don’t they ask me round to their places for luunch or cuppa,as they don’t realise that it means I have yet another day stuck indoors in my sick pit.I really don’t mean to moan,just having been home for so long get fed up being in so much.Too polite to suggest I visit them.Sorry if I sound ungrateful.
Anyway if its dry will try to pop up allotment later this afternoon 
Don’t know about invasive dentistry at this stage Karen,are you in your low period,open to infection?
Love to all Hugs((())) Chris xxx<3
Dearest Karen, I think that you are being far too hard on yourself. You may have finished Chemo technically but you are still in the middle of this last cycle! I dont think that you will begin to see an improvement until at least 3 weeks after the end of this last cycle and even then it is going to take time to fully leave you system. You need to tell hubby this and anyone else that is expecting the old Karen back too soon. You have done so well with everything you have gone through since your ops in December and you have to keep telling yourself that despite feeling crappy now that you wont have to go through this again and with each week that passes you will feel better. You are in the car park lovely lady but you just dont have the right change for the parking machine. very soon some nice man will come along and kindly give you his ticket and you will be free ( God that was a shit analogy soz lol)
With regard to your dentist I would ask your ONC and see what he/she says. I was lead to believe we had to wait until well after chemo finished before we had any work done but I may be wrong.
x x x
Chris, I have a thirst for the first few days after chemo. It’s not a dry mouth as such, but a yucky mucousy mouth and a need for fluid. It’s horrid.
Sandra , I did lots of reading regarding rads as I also felt I had had enough. But for me it made sense as it seems grade 3 no nodes has a tendency to come back. So hit it with everything. It’s meant to be easier than chemo, just the travelling for me that’s a nuisance.
Chris, we have a veg patch at the top end of the garden (don’t I sound like I have an estate?). I am surprised just how much I have managed to do this year as I expected it to lay barren. Thankfully with it being just here I can pop out and do little and often. We need to get the tomatoes into grow bags, but having chemo on Friday threw this weekend out (when it was sunny) and now I feel up to it it’s raining. Next weekend it will be then. Last weekend I put the squash and sweetcorn in. We already have onions, spring onions, kale, beetroot, carrots, parsnips, leeks, courgette, lettuce, landcress, spinach as well as the fruit; yellow and red raspberries, gooseberries, red currants, rhubarb (boy do we have that) and strawberries. It’s amazing how much you can fit into a small space. I am really pleased we have managed to get it done as you cannot beat picking your own produce.
Paula , sorry you’ve joined me and Kath on the loo (so to speak). I hope you manage to get some relief. Do you have movicol? I take 2 a day when constipated and it sorts things out.
Karen, if you have dental work ask for antibiotics at the same time – this would sort any possible infection out. I had a gum infection during chemo 3 and needed work to clean area and was also prescribed antibiotics. I had no problems. And I was told it takes 3-6 months to fully recover after chemo – so give it time!!! One small step each day to recovery.
Well the bottom saga continues. I left taking movicol for a day after chemo to ‘enjoy’ the freedom of not going!! This may have been a school girl mistake – I was dreadfully constipated last night and after two arduous trips to the loo and lots of effort finally gave birth. I was in dreadful pain afterwards and didn’t sleep due to the pain. I used my anaesthetic cream and took pain killers all to no avail. Since Saturday evening I have been taking movicol, but still nothing today and I am getting slightly scared about the next movement. I was told that after chemo 6 I had to wait 4 weeks until my diet could return to normal – on that day I am off to the supermarket to buy probiotic yogurts and I am going to down them all in one go!!! Probably with prunes and nuts and whatever else was on Kath’s list.
I hope you all have a good half term – if the rain stops
Alison xxx
This is a non rhyming poem, inspired by a trip to Asda today (a BAD, bad day) using my bus pass. I looked at the photo on it, which was taken 6 years ago and said to OH “I’ll never look like that again” he agreed and I almost started to cry in front of everyone!!
Heart Full Of Tears
With dark hair and eyes
I looked quite solemn
when that photo was taken.
Unremarkable,
unsmiling.
Different to now.
Bald, moon faced, alien.
No tears in my eyes,
but plenty in my heart.
Love Kath xx
Afternoon Vals,
OK friends and cousin visited,feel horrible about the moan this morning because it was a lovely visit,caught up with lots of gossip,they brought lovely flowers and chocs.Not happy it’s still pouring with rain so can’t go up allotment or anywhere,so fed up stuck indoors.weather for Suffolk show tomorrow,not very good,like today really,so umbrella,warm clothes and boots order of the day.
Funki what you said is so right,we are thinking last one and back to normal,but those that are there are finding its not the case.Does anyone know how long it takes for drugs to get out of our system?
Love Chris xxxx<3
Chris, when I had my last one I asked onco how soon I would begin hormone treatment and when can I see RA consultant about resuming Methotrexate injections. She told me to give myself 4 weeks, so maybe that’s how long they take. No wonder we all felt so awful whilst going through it as we only waited 3 weeks on average for following treatment, unless bloods weren’t right!!
Love Kath xxx
Kath you just made me cry 
Alison not heard of yellow raspberries or landcress,is it a watercress?I have a small patch by my greenhouse down the garden it has red currants blackcurrants,full of berries,gooseberries,bought 1 plant didn’t know they root themselves so have 5 plants now all showing fruit.I have strawberries,looking good at moment but last year looked good but not much fruit,don’t know why,they are 3 yrs now,so fingers crossed ok this year,plenty of flowers.I also have raspberries which pop up everywhere,usually dig up and move back near the fence.I have a lovely cultivated thornless blackberry,always fruits well,massive fruits,would do well in a show.
Took pics of my bluebells under the fruit trees yesterday with my new garden ornament a fairy asleep on a toadstool,I love it.
Oh well rain is settling new stuff into allotment so all is well.
Oh and just to mention,my friend that came this morning,fell on ice 2 years ago ,banged back of her head,damaged her brain and hasn’t been able to taste or smell anything since,and we are moaning about taste whilst on chemo.At least we will get back to normal,but she never will.She said cooking is a problem,her other half has to suffer either too much flavour and seasoning or not enough.She gave him dinner ,he said what is this mince,we usually have with potatos,not rice,she said it’s chilli,he said it’s not 
Anyway love to all Chris xxx<3
chemo 6, FEC 5, Day 6, the hormones beckon!!
Today has been a really BAD, bad, day. Slept very badly and woke up feeling exhausted. Still went to Asda (our usual Tuesday treat/torment) and had a very small breakfast, discussing with OH the chances of recurrence, mets, a new primary!! Just terrified of the thought of having to go through chemo again at a later date. Walking around the store I felt as though I was going to collapse in a heap some of the time or throw up over the shopping at others. Managed to get around though. Treated myself to a couple of iTunes vouchers. I downloaded a brilliant British Birds app yesterday. Photos, info and bird song - lovely. Then at bus stop - read previous post!! Hence sad poem.
So sorry to hear so many of us are suffering in various departments (mouth, bum, joints etc) and I’m looking forward to feeling normal again. Only reading side effects of aromatase inhibitors, it sounds like same old, same old with some of them. And what about this bloody weather???!!! Where’s summer - AGAIN!!
Sorry to be so grumpy, but looking at my bus pass photo really did upset me. It seems so silly to be so upset about the changes in me.
Love Kath xxx
Sorry to make you cry Chris. What did I do??
Kath you made me cry too! I am crying in my heart a lot lately. I had to hand over my passport as proof of ID, as you do here, and saw my photo, and the lady just kept staring at me then looked away very quickly - I said to her it is me really! Se didn’t mean to be rude.
when I look at my self now I get really depressed, not that I’m vain but uncle fester keeps looking back at me!
I am having a really hard time this last cycle with se, I went to reiki today and blubbed and swore beforehand, good to get it out, and my reiki lady, who is lovely said the problem is you head is telling you it’s over but your body is not! So it will be a constant battle at the moment. Unfortunately chemo can take anything up to six months to a year to get out of our bodies, we should start to feel better after about a month of the last one, but not normal for a while.
am heading for an early night again as really tired, and cranky. Linda you will understand this I had to make a quick dash into our local cafe before picking boys up from school, stomach cramps were terrible and I knew I would not make it home. Thank god it had just been cleaned as French toilets are not the best!
sending you all big love and cyber hugs and hope you se are minimal!
xxxxx
Afternoon all. TAX 2 day 7
Have loads of bone pain which Im trying to control with codeine . Feeling really yucky and fed up. I WANT TO BE ME. Trouble is of course how will we know who we are after all this.? Like you Kath I find my mind wondering over all the what ifs. The thought of revisiting this chemo journey is terrifying. But some how we do have to find a way of living that is liveable don’t we.
Chris I totally agree with the sentiment “why don’t we get invited out - rather than have people over”. My son and family visited today, it was so lovely but SO tiring too. I wish I could be more pro active and ask for what I need rather than try and make it ok for everyone. (Habit of a lifetime)
Well moaning over. I’ll continue putting one foot in front of the other till I reach the car park .
Tup x
Oh Kath what a horrid day for you struggling with the shopping trip,I hate shopping at the best of times,hubby loves it,picks up what we need and then stands and studies all the other options on the shelf aaaaargh!!! You made me cry because I don’t look like me anymore when I take my wig off,none of us do.Everyone says how well I look and I have been lucky with not too bad se’s,but under the makeup and wig I don’t look like me.I don’t like hubby having to look at me either,so only take wig off late evening after shower.First thing in morning is get dressed,come down,makeup and hair,then breakfast.I even ask him to close the curtains in the evening after my shower so no one can look in at me.My dear neighbour died aged 45 about 8 yrs ago from non hodgkins lymphoma,leaving 2 young sons,just like William and Harry were,it was pitiful to see her walking around the house like a little bald alien,she used to do her chemo at home away from hospital germs.Conversations we had at that awful time keep repeating in my head,I remember her saying Chris there are no guarantees.Anyway I am getting sad now so enough of that.
Tup glad it’s not only me that thinks that.
Wattie Karen glad you made it to toilet,thank goodness they were clean,my worst nghtmare 
Kath I won’t read other threads about secondaries,end of life etc as once you start dwelling on it and thinking the worst you end up depressed and frightened.We are the Valentines,we are strong,we will conquer,united we stand.
Love to all Chris xxx<3