Hello Girls,
Sandytoes, dont be sad honey. originally I was down for MX so I got used to the idea during Chemo, so when I had the lumpectomies it was kinda a chance… so it has not taken me long to get back to the idea of an MX
Lorna: Great to hear this.------ tra la la … yippee all done !!!
I hear I am also still young at 43 it did not occur to me that I could go to a young womens forum !
BB
BB - you are still young! Especially for all of this cr*p!
The forums are really useful if you would like to meet similar aged women and while the majority on my forum were interested in the seminars on fertility there were great seminars on reconstruction, lymphoedema, menopausal symptoms, body image and sexuality, diet etc. I don’t think there’s another one down south for a while so I guess it depends if you still feel as though you need support by then.
I went literally a month after diagnosis and managed to get myself switched over to the excellent surgeon who led the oncoplastic reconstruction seminar - and now also to the fertility specialist! I’m also still in touch with a few of the girls I met there.
x
Hey Sandytoes,
I don’t feel young right now… but a few of the subjects would have been of interest, may keep a look out for another southern one and see if I think it would be useful at the time.
Been for a long walk today felt good.
hugs,
BB
Hello All,
Good Results this morning, Clear margins no more surgery planned.
Start Rads when I am healed.
BB
PHEWEEEEE!! Great news!!
Rexi - have you started rads yet…?
x
Yee ha… go girl .xxxx
Berthab - fantastic news over the moon for u
Lorna - yayyyyy well done on finishing honey
I am having a tough week. I think mainly because I have had a pain in my back, just below my shoulder blade for over a week now. It’s not painful it just feels bruised when I touch it. I went to docs and they said I had pulled a muscle and made nothing of it. I was still concerned so called BCN and she thought it was from radiotherapy as its that same side. But I am still worried and scared and driving myself mad it’s something bad. I had good tumour count results last week but don’t know how reliable they are. I don’t think it’s helped reading that blog that sandy toes was talking about recently. I have also been following Lisa’s story and am so sad at her news this month
I’m so sorry to moan to u all but feel like all my friends and family are so happy that my treatments finished but I feel the worry has only just started! Anyone else feeling like this or am I just being silly?
I am sure hopefully once back pain goes I will be ok. Do u think I should insist on a scan? Just interested to hear anyone’s thoughts
Thanks junies, keep well Katie xxx
Hi Katie,
Sorry to have brought Lisa’s bad news to your attention - it was only when Rexi was talking about the book, but I’ve stopped recommending it now for that reason. Her book really helped me when I was first diagnosed and I read the book in one sitting and bought copies for others. It’s really sad.
I’ve been to my onc twice with worries now. I had a cough that lasted a couple of months - he said I was fine and it did go. And recently I found some weird red bumps by my mastectomy scar. It was the weekend. I was home alone, was naughty and googled and diagnosed myself with skin mets and got in a right old state! When my husband got home he also googled and got in a state too. So I know the worried feeling all too well and you can’t reassure yourself with platitudes like ‘it’s probably nothing’ as that’s what we were all thinking/hoping prior to the initial diagnosis. Can you book an appointment with your oncologist or surgeon? I did and was seen 2 days later and he was SO disinterested in these alien lumps that I almost felt silly! He said it’s tissue damage from rads and surgery. But I told him i’d be back if I had more worries!!
I think the thing that scared me the most was that I’m feeling ‘normal’ (with a few amendments) and happy again and after my scare I also felt scared of feeling happy as the more I build myself up, the bigger the fall. BUT I am determined NOT to let my breast cancer diagnosis ruin the rest of my life - which will hopefully be a bloody long time!
I really hope someone is able to check you out properly and put your mind at ease and stop the worry otherwise the worry will just take over. And I’m so sorry to have worried you by bringing that blog to your attention.
X
PS Katie - did you completely cover up your rads area in the sun or just go with a high factor suncream?
Lorna - hope you’re enjoying freedom from your daily hospital trips!! X
Please dont be sorry sandytoes, I would have read it anyway as I follow her on fb! Whats your facebook name?
I know exactly what you mean about feeling normal and happy now, and I guess every ache and pain we now get is going to bring us back down to reality with a big fat THUMP!
I did go back to my oncologist (thats who i meant when i said doc) she was so uninterested in it! I bet they get this all the time!
I am going to wait another week and if I still have got the pain insist on another appointment.
I used factor 50 in the sun and covered up apart from when I went swimming with the kids.
I was in no rush to get my body out in a bikini anyway!!!
thanks for the reassurances once again
Katie xxx
Hi -I feel the same except im waiting on the happy feeling to kick in. I have a cough that antibiotics did not clear, its ob nasty in my mind !
I went to discuss returning to work , was really optimistic and keen to get back in my team. I was flabbergasted as they are insisting that the best way to “support me” is to move me . Now, it is to work with my friend who they are struggling to get a body for to decrease her ever expanding workload. It is a stressful job that she is struggling with , as much as i want to be useful to her i feel that it may get inbetween our friendship. She has been a rock to me , stays in same street to boot.
Anyway , after a heated meeting it boiled down to the fact that my team need continuity , they are scared i will go back of sick. I feel so upset about it as that is obvously my demon !! She also asked me when i hoped to get the all clear. I explained to her the blah blah regarding my diagnosis and ongoing hormone therapy to which she replied that
"oh i hear folk saying all the time they have the all clear "…stupid c**…
It is for a 12 week period so i will do it with my head held high as i am determined that such crap will not stress me this year , they should have a course where employers can go to teach them how to deal with people returning into the workplace after a serious illness .
Rant over…
xxxxx
Hi Lorna
I am sorry to read that you are having a difficult time at work and wondered whether you had read the BCC EMPLOY charter which sets out your employers responsibilities regarding your breast cancer diagnosis, it is available to download or order so that you can give them a copy and you can read more here:
Our helpliners are also here to offer you further support and information on 0808 800 6000, lines are open Mon-Fri 9-5 and Sat 9-2
Best wishes
Lucy
That’s awful Lorna. I have to ring my supervisor every fortnight to let her know how I am. I am not even sure if I want to go back to work even though they have kept my job open for me. I had only been working for them for 3 months when I was diagnosed. At the moment I don’t think I could tolerate the bitchyness again. I will see how I feel after Radiation treatments.
It is what i have been focusing on ,i so want my "normality " back .I work in a great team and i am 1 of only 2 of us who have a permanent contract…local goverment at their best. It is simply convienent for them to move me for service continuity , kidding on that they are doing it in my best best interests!! THEY are telling me that i would struggle to cope with the responsibility grrr makes me so angry
Lorna, I totally understand your anger and frustration. Rant as much as you like, it hopefully help a little bit. If they are trying to move me off my team or my role, I d be very upset.
I have been on regular contact with my line manger and so far we are still on the same page. Early Jan, my HR department suddenly has shown an interest in my wellbeing and how they can ‘support me better’ - I was totally fine when they just let me get on with it - one of the things they wanted to help me with was re critical illness cover - jeez - they are months behind! The small print of that insurance says, to have to contact them within x number of weeks of diagnosis - I would have forfeited a claim months ago if I d waited for my hr department! Anyway, they arranged me to see the occupational health doc next week. For an hour… I understand he is really there to figure out the phased return etc and write a report. I can think of advantages and disadvantages of this, let’s see what happens.
And re ‘all clear’ comment - it’s so very tedious having to explain this over and over again. Television has so much to answer for.
Katie - what did your onc explain re tumour marker? I asked my onc last week after you mentioned it and his answer was a bit fuzzy. It sounded like they can cause more heart ache with inconclusive results, bit like why they don’t do regular mammograms on younger women. He said they have not checked them on me. As he was going to request some blood tests for me anyway (after the large amount of antibiotics over Xmas, during which a liver test went weird), he has also requested a marker result. What are the numbers that will come back and how should they be interpreted?
Sandytoes, I have read the blog. Couldn’t believe it! So so sad 
Not started with radiotherapy yet. The wound is Still open. I have just been put back on antibiotics on fri coz it’s seemed to take to long. Can’t start with RT until it’s proper skin, as it’s near or even in the area they want to treat. Getting slightly anxious with the delay…
Rexi xxx
Lorna, I just don’t get how your work can be that insensitive. They clearly have absolutely no idea what u have been through. Maybe it will be fun to work with your friend in a different role?
rexi, my onc was also very vague about the tumour markings. I was just being nosy and looking through my blood test results a while ago and noticed tumour markers on one of the pathology reports and asked what this was. She explained they check this at the beginning of chemo and mine had increased which apparently is quite normal as the neulasta injection makes this result high. Therefore she just wanted to check it had come back down 3months after my last chemo. It should be between 0-25 and mine was 40 while I was having chemo and now came back down to 12 so I am classed as “normal” however she did stress not to read too much into it!!!
Let me know what yours is now.
On a separate note, I am back training in the gym to shift the stone I put on last year. Can I lift weights with my left arm that I had the lymph nodes removed from?
Katie xxx
Lorna, that is shocking. I’d be really upset too, in your shoes. Have you called the helpline for advice?
Rexi, sorry to hear you’re still having problems with your wounds. Wishing you a speedy recovery so you can get the rads ball rolling.
Katie - I’ve been going to the gym or for a swim everyday. I’m not sure about weights, but I’ve been steering clear at the moment. I see my surgeon on Thursday and will ask her. Is your expander under your muscle? That’s what I’ve been struggling with - everytime I do something that uses my chest muscles it feels really weird. I almost drowned when first went swimming. Feels great getting some fitness back though, isn’t it? And I am currently having my Herceptin and they weighed me and I’ve lost 5lbs in 3 weeks since my last one so I’m pleased with that. Although a long way to go!! Need to lose about 2 and a half stone! Damn chemo munchies, good hospital food when in for my op and A gluttonous Christmas and New Year!!!
X
Whats this about tumour markings…oh we learn new stuff every day. See my onc in feb so will add that to my list…
Sandy T- GYM…WTF, lol, walking is my limit at the mo… go gal …xxx
love to all
xxxxxx
Long walks though Lorna! Didn’t you do 4 miles the other day? I am desperate to shift this blubber and build up my fitness again. All part of feeling like “me” again…
I’ve never been told about my tumour markers…I still have bloods taken every month for my Herceptin so was assuming they were keeping an eye on my liver function and tumour markers…but will ask next time I see the onc.
x
Supertrouper - ive got a westie…too cute, you too.lol.xxxxx