Hi everyone, just wondered how everyone remains positive through all this? One minute I think the chemo and radiotherapy is just something I’ve got to go through to have a normal life again, (heartened by Ann’s positve message on another thread) and everything will be alright and in time it won’t dominate my thoughts, to feeling panicked and anxious about it all xx
I take a day at a time. I find I get panicky if I think too far into the future. Right now I’m on day 2 after first chemo. If I think about surgery and rads later down the road it feels impossible. But today is possible. Today I’m ok and that gives me strength for tomorrow.
Cassie x
Hi jen i think this is when the forum becomes a must , you have so much going on that sometimes its hourly mood changes much like a grieving process, we are all thrust into this sudden change and we are all grieving the loss of our lives before bc ,but see this is as a temporary glitch thats what i am trying my best to do! Mind you i did nearly cry trying to find a soft body brush in boots earlier ? but oh well ,this is bloomin hard so go easy on yourself you are aloud to be all over the shop atm x
Hi Jencat. My CT showed an inflamed node under my breast bone so the PET scan was done to check it which confirmed cancer cells present. Treatment wasn’t changed still chemo first to catch any rouge cells in my body then surgery and rads. Surgeon said that chemo would zap the node and rads would mop up anything chemo had missed.
Chemo going ok.just tired and groggy. Occasional sickness but the tablets are working well. Not much appetite but just drinking plenty.
Cassie x
Jencat i am like Cassie, takingvthings a day at a time. However before chemo on wednesday and the weeks before i had several panicky wobbles. I phoned my bcn and went in to see het. We discussed everything. She then put me in touch with someone who had been just like ma and is now nearly at the end of her treatment. It has been a great help. Its easy to say try not to worry but so much harder to do xxx
I expected a major wobble just before first treatment yesterday as I’ve always been a worrier and had anxiety. Though I was more worried that my bloods wouldn’t be good and they’d have to postpone it. I’d got myself mentally prepared and I didn’t want them to ruin it. But all was fine and we went ahead.
Cassie x
This is chemo day 3 for me, if you count receiving chemo as day 1. Slept well last night but feeling a bit off this morning. Temp is ok but feeling a bit light headed. But that might be lack of food as I haven’t eaten much. Just eating some ginger biscuits to calm stomach and give me a sugar pick up lol.
How are you doing?
Cassie x
Jencat
Glad you have a starting date! It will be good to organise what you need now to be prepared and in control! Hope all goes well and smooth.xx
Best wishes for your PET scan. We can’t help swinging from positivity to panic moment by moment. This whole process is an emotional and physical rollercoaster. This forum is a great support and all we can do is take a day at a time x
Hi Jencat, Just a quick reply to say that I had a lumpectomy September 2016, chemo in December 2016 and Radiotherapy in April, 2017. I still have three weekly herceptin injections, but feel that I am now well on the road to recovery. You do take things a day at a time and each step moves you forward on your journey. There is light at the end of the tunnel and you will find that the days go by quickly. Next year you like me will be wondering where the last year went to. Alison xx
Gosh Jen sounds awful to be fair could you at least hear people and talk to them x hope you never have to repeat it hugs ? x
Sometimes a cry can do you the world of good x no good if you got mascara on unless you going for the KISS look ?
Hello,
just diagnosed and chose this thread as everybody keeps saying ‘stay positive’ but oh my! It is a challenge … the world is spinning, I’m trying my best not to cry in front of my children, I still don’t understand all the jargon 
and it is soooo scary I have my first appointment with an oncologist on Monday morning and waiting for the start date. Chemo first as tumour is big and in lymph nodes; then surgery.
Just wanted to say hello to all who understand what’s happening in my little world xxx
anadan
Anadan you are in the best place with us all. Yes we all have this illness but we support each other when anyone is struggling but if you read some of our comments you will see laugh along the way too.
It is hard to say don’t worry so I will say hold your head up, try to be positive and send a huge hug
You will feel a little better and more in control once you have a treatment plan xx
Hi Anadan,
Glad you’ve found us, although sorry to see you here.
Getting diagnosed is always such a shock, so what you’re feeling is quite normal, although the anxiety is horrible.
It is like learning a new language when first diagnosed. but you will quickly get to grips with it, so do come here & ask anything you need to & do look at the main bcc site here for any info you need. There is also the helpline if you need to talk things through.
There is a time & a place for it, but general googling is best avoided as it only tends to feed anxiety until you know & are clear about where you are with it all. NHS Choices & Macmillan are also useful sites.
There is loads of support from all the lovely ladies here & when you start treatment, do look at the relevant ‘going through treatment’ threads so that you can chat to others at the same stage.
Honestly, it does get better when you know where you are with it all, the early days of diagnosis tend to be the most difficult, but it does pass.
Thankfully, you will now get it dealt with.
hugs
ann x
Anadan
You are not alone on this journey! This forum together with your BCT, you will get there! Its difficult to come to terms with at first but does get easier once you know your treatment plan and can prepare to get started. You can laugh, you can cry, you can rant, you can rave on here as we all understsnd what you are going through. Ask anythng you like and rhere will be someone who supports you! There are some fab CC and other members who use their own experiences to help each other. You will also find yourself advising others too with your experiences. Lots of love.xx
Big hugs to all of you, lovely ladies xxx your positive vibes mean a lot xxx thank you for your warm welcome xxx
so, I had an appoinment with the most wonderful oncologist today, she gave me a big hug before she said anything 
and then tried to explain things … one step at a time I need another biopsy because another small lump has been found in the other breast, CT scan , lymph nodes results (FISH) and if everything comes on time I will start with fec on 30 Oct.
I had a meltdown today, cried and mumbled to my nurse how dissapointed I was, eating healthy, doing exercise and still, it’s got me :(
My little daughter managed to brighten my day, though I’ve had very short hair all my life, but she said this morning: ‘Mum, please choose a long hair wig, so I can practsise my French plaites.’ ??
love to you all xxx
I agree totally Cherry Bakewell. I don’t drink (Not for over 10 years) never smoked and never done drugs. I even exercised and had an active lifestyle. If people were to look at me again a many people I know and predict who would get cancer my name would definitely not be top of that list. Tho here I am at 34 years old going through chemo, facing a single or possibly double mastectomy and rads. Potentially I’ll be going through an early menopause with all the added issues around that.
A consolation to me when I was diagnosed was that it is random ( or in some cases gene related) it’s not something caused by lifestyle choices which means I haven’t given myself cancer. It’s an obstacle that’s been placed in my path which I am going to over come. In a year’s time when treatment is all done and dusted I’m sure I’ll be a different person to who I am now. But a better person for having had this experience. The rest of my life is going to be a roller coaster of exciting new things. I want to try everything that I haven’t already.
Don’t worry Anadan you might not think so now but you have the strength to get through this. You’ll need to lean on others and this forum is great for that! But you can do it. We all can do it.
Cassie x
Cassie and cherry ? such wise words
Unfortunately this disease is non discriminate and can get anyone at any time all we can do is kick ass and fight the good fight and not look for reason or blame in this process xx
Glad to hear that you have an approachable oncologist. One step at a time, you will have bad days but overall way more good ones.
I spoke to a lovely lady this morning who is 14 years into this and her positive outlook made me pull up my Lady Bowler pants and feel so much better. If you haven’t come across the above mentioned pants yet please refer to the emotional and grateful thread. It will have you in stitches!
We are in this together so stuck with us and we will help where we can.
? I so agree with regard to victim blaming, I’ve been a pretty good girl over the years especially food wise, I do like my red wine but that’s my only vice. My dad has always been fit active and very clean living and he has had so much bad luck health wise including cancer this year. We can help ourselves recover and feel well with a good diet and exercise but it’s no magic bullet against disease itself.