I don’t know if I’m just blocking things out but my bc diagnosis still feels sureal and like it isn’t true. Even though I had lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy 2 weeks ago I have been really well after it except for the odd day of being tired and the fact that I have wounds healing. I feel a fraud for not doing housework and just taking it easy. Also for all the worry I have put on my family, especially my 23 year old son as he is autistic and thinks the worst of everything. I get the results of my surgery tomorrow and there is some part of me that still feels they are going to say it’s been a mistake. I know that seems strange to say
how we feel is a strange thing for sure and for me it changes all the time
.I was diagnosed 6th Dec after being told I had a very painful cyst that I’d been getting it drained (ouch) for weeks before finding out it was cancer.I like you am recovering after mamoplasty and snb am different each day.Everyone deals with this different I would expect, but things that are helping me :talking and talking to my husband,family and friends.Our son is only 5 so I know what’s that’s like worrying about them. remember though that’s none of this is your fault,cancer just happens,which I know is so hard yo get your head round.I was very low risk and yet here I am!
other things that I’m doing to get me through :
writing stuff in a journal or diary just to get it out of your head
meditation apps -I use headspace and have done for 1.5 years and it’s helped me through in the past when I’ve faced anxiety.
In my bad days I take it hour by hour and day by day.
I wish you lots of luck for tomorrow.Let us know how things go.You are not alone though we are all with you.Sending you a massive hug xx
Hi Chelle. I think your choice of words, “surreal” are spot-on. The point at which you are told, everything changes. I describe it as suddenly being ‘beamed up’ to Planet Cancer from Planet Earth. Whoosh!
And for a while, you will have one of each of your two feet, on each of these two, very different, planets. Which is challenging. But, over time you do come back to planet-earth. Wishing you everything. Hug. Wonky X
Hi - I was diagnosed 2 weeks ago and had a mastectomy & sentinel node biopsy 6 days ago. I also sometimes feel its surreal and hasn’t really happened - so you’re not alone in that! I’m sure everyone else in your life wants you to make sure you look after yourself - that’s best for them as well as you. Good luck tomorrow.