Sammidz…thanks for your support and comments. My god you have been through it to lose partner and babies. Bloody hell but life is unfair sometimes and some people seem to get more crap than others don’t they.
I hope you come back onto this thread when you are having a bad day and know that you can rant and rage all you want. Say it all hun.
Take care,
Sheana x
Thanks Sheana, I will do.
P.S. Lovin your profile pic, it’s fab x
Yea…incredible likeness to me, quite spooky really! x
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Hey n, think my mojo must be with yours so if it turns up, lob it my way.
I want to apologise for turning this thread into an argument earlier but M just pressed my button today and I blew my top! Sorry.
Sheana x
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Well…I was the one who M responded to with her comment in my darkest hour. But…after my adrenalin rush of wanting to flatten her I felt much better lololol
Good luck with your experiments…think I’ve tried a few myself…erm…music…radio 5…reading…bought a machine that plays relaxing noises like rain etc but that just made me get up to the loo frequently…playing bejeweled on Facebook on my lappie…TV…the lot.
Sheana x
Hi Norberte
Have to agree with everything you said about M’s post, we certainly do not need it when we’re already feeling down.
Hi girls I agree with all the last posts and we need somewhere to say how we tuly feel some of us have had other things in our lives besides cancer but this isnt a competition as to who has had the worst life its supposed to be about supporting each other, I too was very upset by the post that was on here. By the way there must be a land of mojos perhaps they are with the biros and socks that always go missing, love to everyone it feels comforting to know we all feel the same suzan x by the way sammiditz hope I have spelt it right I think you are coping admirably after all you have been through my thoughts are with you x
Hi, hope you don’t mind me joining, previous comments are so right, this forum is supposed to be the one place we can say our true feelings, and for someone to comment get on with it, is the reason that I rarely post, life is hard for all dx with bc, but I feel because I had a lumpectomy and didn’t need chemo, I’m not ‘allowed’ to feel sad, so outwardly to friends and family I have to try and be upbeat, but surely, on here people who have been through a similar dx should be supportive and not judgemental. If someone can’t be a support to others then don’t post!
I hope eventually, we can all begin to feel some kind of ‘normality’, whatever that is.
Take care x
I’ve just found this thread and am so pleased it is here. I feel the same and also guilty that I feel like this. My daughter was amazed that anyone would suggest that having BC was ‘lucky’! Whatever format it and the treatment took! I am told I look really well, I feel really awful. I’ve just stated on Citalopram and feel that I am letting everyone down: firstly I get BC then I can’t cope, what a wimp!
It is really helpful to know that I am not alone and that I don’t have to feel quite so bad about being so useless. Christmas is coming and, as I cannot work at the moment, money is tight so that just adds to the depression.
Anyway rant over for now.
Thank you so much for starting this thread and giving we primary ladies a place to feel safe.
Best wishes to all x
sheena I dont think you need to flatten myfanwy18 she is probably already deflated now after some of the comments.It is so hard to not comment on things in haste especially when we are feeling down and have much more terrible things to deal with and can’t understand why some people feel the way they do,I have done this myself when going through chemo I was up in the middle of the night and feeling pretty s—y(not that that is any excuse) and another poster(who didn’t have BC) was saying some things and I just snapped and told her basicly to pull herself together and that I thought she was being oversensitive.I felt really bad and did apologise to her,but I wasnt crucified for it.I have to sometimes really bite my tounge and remember that although other peoples problems seem insignificant to me they are massive to them and I have to remember that I once worried and felt sad about the same things.Think you should give myfanwy a break.
sorry if you can’t understand this best wishes Melxx
Ooops I mean tongue,my spelling is bad lol
Well, as far as I’m concerned it’s finished with now so I won’t mention it again. We are all human and make mistakes now and again so yes, i do understand what you are saying Mel.
Let’s move on ladies 
Sheana x
Moving on …I know exactly how you feel, crazylady, about having ‘just’ a lumpectomy and not entitled to feel down. I wish people would realise that being positive isn’t the same as always being cheerful. I feel the need to wallow sometimes and don’t have the luxury of a partner to burden. I think that pretending to be upbeat is exactly what caused my depression in the first place. I took norberte’s advice and have been back to Drs. She was fantastic and spent a lot of time with me and made me feel it was quite normal to be depressed under the circumstances. So thanks for the opportunity to vent and for the advice. I considering my options but think I will go back and get the anti-depressants as the counselling appt could take a while to come through. Take care. xxx
Hi, I have just received my results over the phone after having to wait a horrible two weeks for the FNA result. The nurse has called me today and said it is Benign and that i won’t have to be seen again. It’s weird… I am now left feeling really guilty that i’m not over the moon with the news, but instead wanting answers for what this lump i have is then!
Don’t get me wrong, i am really pleased it isn’t Cancer, but feel i don’t want to be left not knowing what this lump is called, or wondering if it is going to disappear or could it get bigger. etc etc.
Has anyone else been left feeling like this, after hearing the good news they were hoping for?
I think i would rather have it removed so i won’t have to worry about it being there.
Kerry
Most of the time I’ve felt that I couldn’t (have a wallow) to my OH as he always worries so much. That’s why it’s good to be able to come on here and be able to be myself when I’m down. I’ve managed so far without anti-depressants so I really feel for all of you who are having such a bad time. I wonder how long we will be feeling like this. Surely it must stop sometime. xx
Most of the time I have wallowed to OH but not sure what response I was wanting…but never seemed to get the right one…ended up having some “frank exchanges of views” regarding having BC…as in I have it…he doesn’t. Then feel guilty as he is supportive just comes back to men not dealing with emotions that well per se…but then get peeved thinking again I have to make the allownaces when it’s me going through this. Had intended to go out for a walk in the sunny frosty weather but never made it…crashed at 2pm and woke up 10 mins ago…mentally as well as physically exhausted. Have tried the anti-depressant route…never felt that comfortable taking meds. as always acutely aware that whatever the issue is will still be there when I come back down…although I do agree that they help give a person the space they need to gather some strength and reach a place they can start to help themselves. Also though,having completed an Advanced Diploma in Counselling and Psychotherapy June 2009, felt a bit of a fraud taking them and even more despondent that I can’t “counsel” myself…vicious circle kicking in. The main benefit of counselling/therpay (I feel) is having that space in which to be totally honest with oneself…and this site does allow that…it’s all I consider a prop at the moment.
Bettina x
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Hi everyone,
Kerry - we all need answers, cancer or no cancer. I’d insist that someone talks to you either BCN or your GP. I think post-good news blues is quite common. There is stuff here written about finishing treatment etc. I don’t know if any of it might be useful to you?
Bettina - I think depression strikes anybody and you can’t counsel yourself as how could you possibly be detached and impartial when it is your body/life?
Feeling quite chirpy today. I slept really well and friends been phoning me to tell me the hell the commute is to work - heehee!
Thank you Gwendolyn!
That is exactly what i am going to do… I called the Breast care nurse at the one stop clinic that i attended, and ask for an appointment for tomorrow. Although she told me that i didn’t need to go back again… But i have so many unanswered questions! I insisted!! I haven’t even been told the name of this lump that i have, informed if it will disappear in time or get bigger as time goes by! To be honest i don’t want to leave it there as i continually feel for it and it’s driving me mad!
I feel so awful as i am so aware that there is many women out there who would be so pleased to be told that their lump is Benign and to go away and get on with the rest of their life! i must sound so ungrateful. But it’s not that, I just don’t feel i have been properly informed.
So nice to be able to express on this site to people who understand.
Thanks Kerry