Miss Sparkle reveals the murderer’s identity……………………with the help of The Plods.
Demented with uncontrollable rage Archie the driver/butler had to get rid of Blanche, after 30 years of service to a woman he had grown to despise it was only the money that had been bequeathed to him that kept him in the job, when that was about to be taken from him, he decided enough was enough.
Archie sat for hours in the fancy cars plotting Blanche’s demise, his face contorted with fury, not at all consistent with the portrayal of the cheery chappy we all came to know and love??
He carefully mixed the cyanide in the tea pot and watched as Blanche took her first and last slurp………………….
Plods arrest that man…………
Archie Yafist you are under arrest for the murder of Blanche Pepall Meath, at The Madlands Hotel, Norcambe……………
Yafist??? Turns out Archie was a relative of the great Yafist family, Sheik Yafist had been searching for Archie for years , seems he had his own legacy £1000000 something to do with a Grandfather and oil.
Oh well, all’s well that ends well!
And for the others well they are still gambling, conniving and dithering but do all have vast amounts of money.
And what of Milton De Witte? Last heard of riding camels in some desert type place with “runny nose” OLIVE the Waitress???…………….a well suited pair methinks…………
Not quite the end, for there’s a note from Archie left to you all:
"so, worked it out at last did you? Too late I’m afraid, remember that lovey Bugatti Vayron I ordered for Milady? Well, turned out to be the perfect get away car…fastest road car available you know, currently zooming through North Africa if my calculations are correct… And I’ve spent my years wisely, building a lovely collection of classic cars on Milady’s money…silly old girl never would demean herself to check the paperwork, she paid…I put them all in my name! They’re in transit now, lovely…and as for my camels, well…Olive will return them to me when she’s ready, always had a soft spot for Olive, couldn’t have done it without her… "
I have NOT run off with Milton De Witte. Too old for me, not my sort of person and I haven’t enough money to interest him.
Thank heavens that Plod think Archie gave her a slow acting poison. I really thought that the powder he gave me to put into her tea was just to make her sick. Thanks to him though, I’ve now got enough money to quietly disappear, revert to my real name and finish my course at another University a long long way from Norcambe.
Just catching a long distance train now, camels are in the guard’s van Ali and will be dropped off at your local station. Very strange creatures, do not act like normal camels at all. Why are they are demanding cheese sandwiches and cake for the journey?..ok Hump I’ll go and get them.
Well (sniff) I told you I knew who had done it. I was worried for a while that it might have been me because I was rather ill the night before the afternoon tea and there was that strange smell in my hotel room and the powder next to the basin in the bathroom. All was explained when I found camel droppings on the carpet and facepowder that had been nudged off a shelf above the basin in the bathroom. Covered in slime! euch!
Still wish I could remember how I had got back to the hotel and how my dress turned inside out.
Off to meet up with Milton now - he says he has something to tell me…
have you noticed, my picture is upside down? wasn’t when I selected it!!! Maybye that’s our new adventure - coping with life whilst standing on our heads… oh, but MMM you seem to be the right way up!
May I say, Dame G, that you’re acute observation of our “skills” during rehearsals was (a) accurate and (B) very funny?
Tonight’s the night - THE PERFORMANCE OF OUR MURDER MYSTERY.
It must be perfect (I live in hope rather than expectation…) and everyone must be in the Green Room one whole hour before curtain up. Only ONE glitterberry juice permitted beforehand, you can have as much as you like afterwards.
Oh heck, has someone sorted out comestibles and beverages for the interval, for humans and participating companion animals??? Millie Dog is partial to a bit of chicken skin off the roast.
I am still confused - if it is the camels what dun it, why aren’t there any hoof prints in the sand outside the Madland Hotel? I am only asking…
Very Important Director Type Person’s chair has been dragged out of the loft and cleaned up.
Still awaiting frock delivery from Helen.
Break a leg (no pleeeese don’t)
a very nervous Grumpy
Ha! Ha! Jane! It took me 3 attempts! Had to choose a different pic in the end. Even then I think it was more good luck than anything else. Forure rebuild gremlins perhaps? More Mars Bars ( other chocolate etc…) needed for for the techies under the stairs!
x
Isn’t Grumpy simply MARVELLOUS the way she directs so professionally and supports us struggling amateurs so sympathetically. She is amazingly patient; NEVER shouts at us when we forget our lines, lose the plot, or trip over our knee-highs! I’m recommending her (again) for the New Year’s Honours list! :-p *whispers aside* that wasn’t too obvious grovelling was it?
Today, ladies, in Morecambe, it is STILL pi**ing down, and I have a choice between wet jeans and soggy (not waterproof any more ) trainers or shorts and suede sandals. Everything else is packed underneath 3 weeks worth of camping/hotel/cottage stuff. Can’t try and root for anything or EVERYTHING else will get wet too. Ah well, at least we didn’t have to take the tent down in this!
Not on new forum yet, ST, - I’ve still got my (right way up) profile pic! Can’t be dealing with adding/changing pics on this phone - even with free wireless (or ’ screwless’ as that was auto-corrected to yep, I’ ve got a few of those loose!!)
I, Milton, am in love!! Never thought it could happen to me. She is a super-duper sleuthing, cider-drinking lady - Miss Delia Sparkle, will you marry me???
How lovely a marriage in the cast, woo hoo!!
Audience seem to be arriving early which is fab, they must have all heard about our previous productions.
Am soooooooooooo excited, may win an award tonight!! Have stashed strawberry meringue with toffee sauce under THAT chair and a bottle of something kinda special !
Trying to get off the “CBA” bench…foot is still very swollen and I now fit NO shoes, have found an old pair of birkies, loosened them all off and will try to go to the supermarket with them on ! Such a drag, literally xx
Golly superly gosh weren’t we so lucky with our MMU weather xx
Act 1 went well. The audience seem to be appreciative of our efforts. Costumes are amazing, probably would have been been better if Kay had done them but having a totally fantabulous birthday does take precedence. I have a feeling that my birthday which ends in an 0 next year will pass in a blaze of obscurity. In fact, I hope so, as I don’t want to be reminded of how old I am as I only feel about 30.
Ready for Acts 2 and 3 now. Feel that the reviews should be pretty good, after all we’re an established rep company now. Please stop all the sucking up to the director, Dame Grumpy is far too astute to fall for it . (Psst. The very expensive chocolates are behind the bar, just say Benchland and they will pass them over.)
Congratulations to Milton and whatever your name is. A Benchland wedding how exciting! Extra special tiaras and super spangly knee-highs required for that?!
I’m home now. Car unpacked and 2nd load of washing on - 1st already on the line outside. When I get around to uploading my photos, I’ll put the one I took in Morecambe last night so you can see what it normally looks like and realise how lucky we were!
!
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) trainers or shorts and suede sandals. Everything else is packed underneath 3 weeks worth of camping/hotel/cottage stuff. Can’t try and root for anything or EVERYTHING else will get wet too. Ah well, at least we didn’t have to take the tent down in this!
in the cast, woo hoo!!
! Such a drag, literally xx