Thanks Theresa, Jacq. Means a lot. I can’t believe I am reacting like this, as I have no symptoms of anything sinister going on. I guess its just brought the memory of initial dx flooding back. Calming down a bit now and feeling silly.
Thanks also Sam
It’s not silly at all - look at what we’ve all been through. Then we just start to get back on an even keel and start to try and put it behind us, and then the slightest little thing involving ‘it’ again completely throws us back into worry mode. xx
jane ((((hugs)))) you and me both, I’m dreading mine - mines due this month and I know when I get it I’m going to be the same until its done…and then worry some more no doubt…maybe I’ll just hibernate till results…mary x
Dear Jane so sorry I wasnt around earlier and even sorrier that you are so scared.It is absolutely normal to feel like this.I had my 3 year post dx mammo in November and I was so frightened.The worst bit was when they,‘just needed a closer look’!!!so I had to have an ultrasound straight away.It was a little cyst.It is unlikely that there will be anything at all amiss so soon but you cant help being scared.We will all be there for you,imagine a circle of Riders round you to keep the baddies at bay.Good Luck honey.
Valxx
Gosh you lot post a lot!I’m losing track of who is meeting who and where.Can someone catch me up please is there :a]a Shropshire meet
b]a London meet
c]a Manchester meet
d]a York meet
If the answer to any of the above is yes then when and where??
Or maybe they are all exclusive and slightly dotty Old One’s are excluded 
Eliza it wasnt till we mentioned the books that the significance of my SR alter ego struck me!How very presumptuous of me.Still I fancy the living forever bit.
Love Valxxx
Hugs Jane, I think any little thing especially if it is medical puts us off kilter and would say that it is a totally natural reaction.There are so many memories attached to our mammograms that it is bound to cause us to do a bit of a flip.Can’t think that anyone would just think it was plain sailing after the year we have all had. I have got appointment with surgeon at start of March,take it that I get a sep mammo appointment ,think will phone up to find out now you have mentioned it.
Val, don’t think we have got any set dates for any meets yet.
Sandra x
Hi Jane…as Theresa says its a natural reaction…we all manage differently. don’t worry lovey.
I’ve just got back from onc appt. Saw a new doctor. Very nice. Asked him about my mammogram and he said ‘right i’m going to write you out a request straight away’…so we went to xray and the lady there wrote in the diary for a date I specified…(as long as it was a year)…and bobs your uncle, I’ve got one Feb19th. I feel relieved in some ways, but only because I want it over with…so Jane love just think…the waiting for an appt is over and the mammo over on Monday…{{big hugs}}…
Val…I’m up for any meet within a reasonable distance, and so far nothing has been arranged as yet…
Helenxxx
just crossed Sandra
Hi all,
Jane, its all very normal for us. i think about that advert where they say some days it isnt just about cancer and thats true. I also think we are now like men. (who supposedly think of sex x amount of times a day) We can go hours and then suddenly ‘c’ pops in, most of the time harmlessly but occasionally it rears its sinister head just to frighten us. Sometimes reading different threads on here sets my mind racing. I know my stats are not great but most of the time i tell myself that i am not a statistic, i am a human being and we are all different. Oh and by the way got my annual mammogram on wednesday.
What date for end of feb, suppose it needs to be saturday or sunday?
so what about 27 or 28 feb at Marble Arch (good for me, Victoria and Paddington and Jacq - u r beckton arent you?) any thoughts?
Linda
Awe thanks everyone for your kind words/support. I knew you would all understand. G is at work and so I had no one to talk with. I’m feeling a lot calmer now and I suppose in some ways it is a good thing, because once it s done I will be able to relax for a while. Not that I worry all the time but you know what I mean.
((((((((((hug)))))))))))
Jings o’ michty but will you lot quit gabbing! I’m a rassenfrassendickdasterdly 10 pages behind or summat!
Anyway, a few leap out. If I’ve missed something really important, just kick me up my Scraggy Scoobs butt and tell me about it. …… Totally forgotten what I was going to say. Typical. If anybody wants my current low down on hormonal changes brought on by chemo and tam, just let me know. You might have to remind me first though.
Oh yes… Um Sheila, hah, welcome to the realms of post last CMF-dom! Yuk , yuk, chortle. Don’t we all think we’re doing great, then that last one hits us! Rest up there Rose, it takes a damn sight longer than you think to get over it. But, by week five post last dose you’ll know you’re getting better. It’s up, up, and away from there on!
Jacq – Black Canyon got ya! Don’t worry about it. I thought I was well out of the shade of Black Canyon cos chemo was long gone. But ho no! I just got hit with my first bout of what approximates to real depression. I think its hormonal – chemo now tam – cos it’s started lifting all of a sudden the last two days. But even if you’re not feeling like you are actually depressed, this damn thing just gets to you. Don’t ever feel bad about taking time out from the forum or the thread. Do what you need to do to find you path to your future. Remember, you can contact us off forum anytime.
Sal, I have totally missed something. I am a numbskull of the highest order. Feel free to give me a Mule ass kicking!
Knitnut – Welcome and can I just say, you look positively puurrrrrfect! Don’t worry about the crying. Leak away! I well up at the slightest thing and I’m three months post rads. Have you started your hormone drugs yet? That has definitely got something to do with it. Pull up a bar stool, take a slug of this (Steel shoves one of Yorkie’s cocktails along the bar), then dump it in the pot plant, and have chug of beer instead. 
Jane, do you really think Casey would damp down her firebox with too many tears? Hell no! Casey, get up in that engine and move us on out to Haven (well soon, haven’t written that bit yet). It’s an injustice it is (how I hated that chicken!), but I know how you’re feeling. My annual is next Friday, don’t even know now if I’m getting the mammogram then or not. Convinced, as I have been since we all got together, that I’m the one that’s getting the recurrence, the new primary, or the dreaded secondary. How sad am I! Chin up Casey, get yer hat on and blow that damn whistle. You have a million miles of track still to ride – and if you don’t derail the train by moving too quickly to the side (JOKING WITH LOVE!!!), you’ll be riding it for yonks yet!
Right, absenting myself so I can finish the Christmas Special. Well there is still snow out there, albeit thawing fast. And anyway it’s a classic. We can repeat it every year! 
Oh, small heads up. It’s not happening here, but can we all remember that “where’s and when’s” should be done off forum. Worked for Ashbourne brilliantly. Just got our security and safety in mind. If I’m being too much of a clucking mother hen, just come to my nest and fix me with a beady eye!
Talking of hens. Our rooster has gone to the big chicken haven in the sky. Thought all of the hens were going that way too. Totally quit eating for the last month in the dangnabbit cold. But, with the lift in temperature, they have emerged apparently none the worse. Who knew! Animals are quite hardy.
Just seen your post Linda re your son wanting to do Science. I was rubbish at writing English - no imagination etc. Loved Science and was lucky enough to be able to do 3 sciences at GCE. Really hope your son can do what he wants. Doing Science can actually help literacy, yes you develop an objective style of wriitng rather than literary, but we are all different. Sorry, it’s a bit of a hobby horse of mine as I am where I am to-day doing a job I love because I did Science. Really, really hope he gets to do what he wants. Whew - just seen your later post and note all is well, thank goodness. Don’t want to lose another Scientist!
Jane - just spotted your post - hugs to you.
Love
Clare XXX
Jane, I had regular panicky feelings in the run up to my mammogram and until I’d had the results at my check-up. As everyone says, I think it is only natural. In fact someone I know who was treated for bc years ago and is now with the 3 yearly screening programme says that she finds the time from getting her appointment until results letter very difficult. Linda, I think you’ve summed it up beautifully.
I can’t commit to a Feb date until I’ve heard from my sister as we are both juggling diaries with when we go to our mother. She needs to have one of us there every fortnight and I’m away mid Feb and not sure what my sister is doing when. Hopefully she’ll get back to me soon.
Val, I think your SR alter ego is fitting - we all keep turning to you for advice and support. You’ve already summoned the Circle to protect Jane today!
Good to hear that the depression is lifting, Carole. You’ve been through a lot in the last year and now you are getting back into regular life so it isn’t surprising that it is all catching up with you. I don’t think you are being too mother hen about security. I was a bit surprised at just how much was public in some other places. Once we’ve all settled on dates I suggest we switch to email/pm for the details of each meet just as we did for Ashbourne.
I think the new brand of tamoxifen is causing me fluid retention, which is a bit tedious.
Eliza xx
hello
just thought I should pop in and say hello as I am joining in the Edinburgh meeting on 24 Jan, and Theresa has given me such a glowing reference! hope I can live up to it…
Theresa thank you VERY much xx
have been reading through the threads which are really interesting although I don’t understand where you are with the story and how that works.
for those of you I haven’t met, I’m just post-chemo FECx6 and waiting to start rads/AI. I was diagnosed with a recurrence to my original bc in June (12 years gap) but with an idc that has mutated from grade 1 to grade 3. Had WLE on recon breast (recurrence is post mx)and then chemo etc.
I hope you don’t mind me barging into the saloon and ordering me whisky (am I doing this right???) but I will try and hit the spittoon!
love monica x
Oh, ps, I love Paolo’s new album - it just makes me dance, even when I’m driving. Like his first, but prefer this one.
xxx
Hi Monica, looking forwards to meeting you! And, yes - I also do weird drive /dancing to Paulo …doesn’t half embarass sons if they are in the car with me at the time!
Jane - (((hugs)))) - perfectly normal reaction - we have/will all react in a similar way, I reckon. My first mammo/ 1 year check up is Feb 2nd - and I know I will be decidely flakey at that time!!
Carole, cluck away Mother Hen! We do need to remember how public this forum is, and, personally, I would rather keep the details of meet ups to PMs and email. We are such an amazingly attractive bunch, if we’re not careful - we’ll have to get personal security to deal with our stalkers!!
Think on! - as we say up North - Hear all, see all, SAY NOWT!!!
Lizzie xx
Hi jjane123, The recipe you wanted for Beef Broth is on “What’s cooking” thread. It is only from memory as I don’t have one written down. I got it from my mother-in-law who didn’t write it down either!!
Hi Lizzie, Isn’t that amazing. I haven’t seen your sister for ages so it will be nice to see her again. Lin and I got on really well and we worked together for many years and I have even been to her house in town and met her family…perhaps I have met you before Lizzie in the passing??
Carole, good to speak to you. Have looked up a recipe you may want but do you want one with nuts in it?
Monica, I am really looking forward to meeting you at last. We had planned to meet up this year but I didn’t know it would be so soon. I think I will have difficulty sleeping the night before. Carole says she remembers having a champagne cocktail there…wicked!!
To everyone else, I keep reading the thread and trying hard to keep abreast of what is happening and to whom… Hugs coming your way. LOve Val
Jane I was also tearful around the time of my mammo - it brings all the memories flooding back. I think it would be abnormal not to feel a little tense.
I’m fame for any meet. I’ll catch up on all the details when I get home. Agree with Mary re travelodge etc.
Yes I am on the Amazon. Incredible but vvv hot and humid. Highligt of holiday is tomorrow with full day out on small boats/canoes with wildlife guide.
Went to be pampered on ships spa today. Still not allowed proper massage til 5 years post diagnosis! had a modified one. Goalposts seem to keep moving.
I get 3 months tam at a time buy only 2 months venlafaxine so end up needing a precription most months anyway but can order online and pick it up from the pharmacy.
Cold a lot better and tam se’s have subsided again. Hope that doesn’t happen with every cold.
Take care all - thinking about you all in the snow - lol. xx
Morning, all.
Hi, Monica, yes you’re doing it right - just beware of the cocktails and avoid the grits! Carole is writing us a Seasonal Special at the moment but once it rejoins the basic storyline you’ll soon pick it up. The early postings on this thread and those in the Newly Devastated thread set out the basic story and as people joined the thread Carole and Sal added them in.
It is now wet and windy here - I think I prefer the snow!
Eliza xx
Morning everyone…
David is off at respite this weekend - so hopefully we will be getting out and about later… It’s been raining here as well overnight so all the snow is finally washed away…
Theresa x
Monica - if you want to get written into the story you will need a storm rider name, horse’s name and if you want a storm animal - most of us have a dog or cat although there is one lynx…
I might be coming down to London in April… there is a large crafting show that i always miss as i am normally in Majorca then… Nicky - not sure it is one you normally go to?
I’ve just been looking at train prices and at the moment they are expensive - but i think the cheaper prices might be online soon…
If i do go I will probably be seeing some of my scrapping friends as they normally go… but it would be lovely to also try and meet up with some London based storm riders at some point…
Theresa x