Hello all,
Val, thinking of you and wishing you well for tomorrow. I think we are all a lot quieter because there is so much going on in the summer.
Yes, it is certainly a good sign that your onc is clearly not worried, Theresa.
Good to see you back, Clare and glad that you had such a good holiday.
Your holiday sounds great, Helen, in spite of the dodgy weather. Definitely worth mentioning the lightheadedness but quite likely related to you being tired.
Love to all,
Eliza xx
Thanks for the circle Riders-it worked!!
The surgeon examined me and said it felt like normal,slightly nodular,breast tissue.He suggested bringing forward my mammo from October to today and that was absolutely clear.Not even any ,what he likes to call,grey areas which have resulted in my needing an ultrasound.So thats that-I am officially 4 years post dx and still clear.I see him again September 2011 but will see onc in May.My actual dx was 6th Oct.
Soā¦TOO keeps on rocking a while longer.
Sheās packing up her carpet bag,loading the buggy and harnessing old Kiwi ready to ride on out.Haven is a great place but Iāve got to try Normality now-even if its only for a while.Iāll be around and reading if you should need me but thatās me done now my loves-Vaya con Dios xxxxxxx
The Old One
Val
Val, so pleased to hear your news. Enjoy Normality - you deserve it.
Glad you had good holidays Helen and Clare. I hope your visit to the GP puts your mind at rest Helen. Mind you, all that time in the car is enough to make anyone light headed.
I hope m-i-lās visit isnāt too onerous Theresa.
Hope youāre starting to feel better Carole and seroma is subsiding.
Itās been torrential rain here for the last couple of hours and, according to the weather forecast, it looks like it will be like that for the next two days. Now I know I wanted rain to water the garden, but hey, itās supposed to be summer and it seems more like November out there.
Excellent news, Val, so pleased to hear it. Iāll hold the fort in Haven for a while.
Iām really hoping Norfolk wonāt have too much rain between tomorrow and Tuesday ā¦
Love to all,
Eliza xx
Yeehaa! TOO rides out! Excellent news.
Will attempt to get the next instalment up this weekend SRs.
Meanwhile, confirmed today that the right expander bag has indeed been punctured, so thatās me under the knife again for a replacement. Typical! If anybodyās gonna get hit with the prickly end of the cactus, itās me. 
So, keeping going with expansion the left side. Iāll spare you the details, but getting the creases in the left expander smoothed out will really helpā¦ And I have a cunning plan regarding scarf wearing that should disguise the fact that Iāll be totally lopsided for a while. Makes you creative, this cancer lark!
Right side replacement will be in about 2 months time, then recovery, then, oh heck, ya da ya da - whole process extended by the time it takes to plan a dangnabbit decent stage coach heist!
Hugs to all.
Morning girlsā¦
Clare sounds like a good time was had by you and yours on your hols. Are you down to less days now at workā¦pre your retirement?
Caroleā¦a burst expansion! blimey lass youāve had extension after extension with this rubbish diseaseā¦but hereās to your left one staying the course! I had a lovely scarf bought for my birthday, never thought Iād wear it, but I did on holiday and it looked alreet!. It hides a multitudeā¦so think thats a good plan of yours! Get one for every outfit you wearā¦
Valā¦brilliant news! And riding out of haven to normalityā¦well you will have the biggest SR escourt ever!!
Hope the weather holds true for you Elizaā¦
Well Iām off for a long long walk nowā¦so catch ya all later ā¦
Helenxxx
Hello all, Val and Theresa so glad you got good news and you can both sit back an relax again.
I have read all the posts. Hugs to allā¦but I now have another problem to add to my other onesā¦ My Dad, who lives on his own collapsed in the park walking the dog yesterday and was taken to hospital by ambulance. People complain about the teanagers of today, well 4 mature teanagers called the ambulance, stayed with dad until they arrived, looked after the dog, and stopped Dad from attempting to get up on his feet. Now thatās the teanagers I want to read about in the newspapers!
I got to the hospital in time to be with Dad while they put him through all the tests. He got discharged but we think he has had another TIA (ministroke) but other wise just very sore hips and a black eye for him. So Dad is now living with me plus the dogā¦and as Richard my OH is still in crutches I guess I will be the only person PHYSICALLY ABLE to walk the doggie! After I had collected dads pill dispencer from his chemist, walked his dog to the park to retrieve his car that was still outside the parkgatesā¦I then took Dad to visit Mum in the nursing home as she was upset and crying thinking the worst poor thing.
My spare room was LOADED junk as we use it as a garage as we donāt have one! So while I was doing my bitā¦ my OH cleared the room to allow my Dad to come and stay. I had to put clean linen on the bed but that was allā¦oh and I had to make the evening meal as no-one had time to eat anything all day!
Today we are back to the Fracture clinic as the plastercast my husband had put on on last week has a hole in it and the plaster is crumblingā¦then tomorrow I go to my hospital for my check-up. I am intending to take a good book and a packed lunch so that I can PRETEND the clinic is busy and chill out there for 5/6 hoursā¦and escapeā¦haha
As I was washing the cooking pots last night I suddnely realised I was getting my haircut with a bunch of friends at 8pm and had forgotton all about itā¦quick phonecallā¦and managed to make it in time. Yesterday at lunchtime I had visitors coming through from Glasgow for the dayā¦but they mamaged to hop on the bus and do all the festival stuff, see a comedy show and have a luch at Petite Paris.
I donāt know JUST HOW I am managing at the momentā¦ but guess when this is all over I may turn into a crumbling wreck, so hope you will all rally to pick up the pieces!..I just havenāt got the time to collapse just now!!! Love to all and thanks for listening to my troubles girls. Love Val
It never rains but it poursā¦
Good morning SRs,
I got back today from holiday - I hate a night flight, but this was a small price to pay for two and a half weeks escapism from work, bc and poor weather. Having said that Iām quite pleased to back as there are certain things Iāve missed including a decent cup of tea - as the Americans serve the teabag and hot water separately which has invariably cooled down once it gets to the table so the tea leaves donāt infuse properly.
Excellent news Val regarding your scare - and thatās great that you are now four years clear (touch wood).
It sounds encouraging about your scan Theresa - just hope you hear soon to properly put your mind at rest.
Sorry about your unfortunate events Val (scottish)and how distressing for your father and mother in particular. Hope he recovers quickly.
Enjoy your walk Helen.
Victoria x
Good morning SRs,
I got back today from holiday - I hate a night flight, but this was a small price to pay for two and a half weeks escapism from work, bc and poor weather. Having said that Iām quite pleased to back as there are certain things Iāve missed including a decent cup of tea - as the Americans serve the teabag and hot water separately which has invariably cooled down once it gets to the table so the tea leaves donāt infuse properly.
Excellent news Val regarding your scare - and thatās great that you are now four years clear (touch wood).
It sounds encouraging about your scan Theresa - just hope you hear soon to properly put your mind at rest.
Sorry about your unfortunate events Val (scottish)and how distressing for your father and mother in particular. Hope he recovers quickly.
Enjoy your walk Helen.
Victoria x
Welcome back Holidayersā¦and Hello Stay at Homersā¦
Val (TOO) Great news, have been thinking about you lots. Think you are so ready to dip a toe in Normality, after the 4 years you have had - you certainly deserve it. Haven is always there to have a bit of respite. I here - ready to ride the boundaries with you - and plenty of horses to choose from! My biggest problem is deciding between Frank and Nancy!
Helen, lovely to see you back, and thanks for the lovely commentā¦I love to be thought of as āfeistyā!!
Carole!!! What are you like!!!..and youāve punctured your expanderā¦how??! Hey, girlfriend, that bar room brawling just has to stop, Steel, it just aint ladylike! Seriously, mate, time you had some good luck, this ātaking one for the teamā has gone way far enough. Really hope things improve dramatically for you.
Scottish Val - think we need to get a Super Woman cape for you, make sure you rest when you do get a chance.
Could do with a return of summer - definately AWOL hereā¦
Lizzie xx
ooops, posted twice, though it wasnāt workingā¦sorry, folks
Morning all,
What fantastic news Val!!! I will stay in Haven a bit and keep the pot boiling along with Eliza but a big party planned to see you off, can I bags TOOās chair now then? 
Thanks for the offer of advice re narrow boats, Iām sure Iāll be in touch as things advance.
Scottish Val, pleased to hear your Dad is okay after his fall, and lovely to hear good stories about teenagers, there are good ones around as you say, blimey what a time youāre having, I was worn out reading about it - comes to something when you look forward to a rest a clinic!!
Carole I donāt believe it!! Well, I do, youāre like me in that if it can go wrong it will sometimes. Do you think we were Bonnie & Clyde in a previous life or something - I donāt know, I try and give out the good karma but only the bad stuff seems to come back - ha haa!!
Sounds like you had a lovely break away Helen, you deserved it!! I hope the visit is going okay Theresa. Great to hear from you Sal!
Welcome back Victoria, looking forward to your travelogue, you will have to do it in installments 
Still canāt do much due to the blinkinā shoulder, my knee has now joined the party and decided to seize up. Putting it all down to Arimidex and old age but would like the scan out of the way now, seems ages until 9 September.
Anyway, have gone on ling enough, thinking of you all and sending big hugs, Di xx
Hello all,
Been trying to get onto the site for days and really frustrated by how slow-moving its been.
Linda, I agree with Eliza, I think youāve obviously achieved a good eating regime as the weight is coming off so quickly after ātreatā weeks - something I have done in the past, but am struggled to get back again. I agree that odd cravings do seem to be the bodyās way of telling us what we need - I eat beef very rarely (not keen on the smell or taste, let alone the difficulty metabolising it, but sometimes it just leaps off the menu at me and those are the times I really enjoy it. Hope you had a fun time showing off your tan and the scarlet nails! Iām not sure when youāre back Nicky, but I hope youāre having a wonderful holiday in the sunshine and that the rush to turn it round when you get home isnāt too stressful. Helen, that lightheadness sounds a trial - hope that your GP has some helpful suggstions, but so pleased that you enjoyed your holiday after all that time in the car. Canāt believe youāre still waiting for that MRI result, but as you say - bad news seems to travel fast so it must be OK. Clare, love the sound of your trip - I shall put it in the ālooking forward toā box for next year (with luck). Theresa, hope youāre OK mādear, that the visit is going well and youāre not too exhausted. Val(TOO), great news - as already greeted on FB - but 4 years is just fantastic. Hope that Normality treats both you & Clare very well. Carole, what rotten luck ā¦ you mustāve lost too much weight and pricked it on a rib. Howās the dating thing going, it sounds like you could do with a lovely distraction right about now. Oh dear, Val(SL), it sounds like you are being overwhelmed there. You poor darling, no point saying ādonāt overdo thingsā but I hope that youāll have some resources left for your own health after all this. I love the idea of you hiding out at the clinic ā¦ hope it worked and you had a nice little respite from all the drama. Welcome home Victoria! What a swine that your knee has joined in with the shoulder Di - my bloke is struggling with both his knees at present and it really is debilitating, so do feel for you.
Positive vibes being sent for all of you awaiting those scans and/or results and thinking of everyone whoās quiet and flying below the radar at the moment.
Enjoy the long weekend everyone - if this rain ever stops!
Debs xx
Hi girlsā¦Debs this site has taken ages to get onto sometimes, but Iāve always been successfulā¦your poor fella love, hope his knees get better ā¦it must be real painful!
Val (sl) what a lot youāve gone through love ā¦I hope your dad is ok, and you too. Fancy spending 6hrs at clinic just to get a rest ;-)poor youā¦rest up now and if you want a āwarbleā about anything ā¦you know its fine to come here missus!
Hi Lizzieā¦how goes your project ā Nancyā ? Summerā¦what its summer, had 2wks in June, feels like its been tipping it down since thenā¦
Di I hope your shoulder has eased somewhatā¦poor you, but at least you are near to getting some answersā¦hang in there loveā¦
My OH got tired of waiting for MRI results and rang up the hospital. He made me a review appointment for the earliest time, which is Oct 5thā¦So that will be 3mths from having had the MRI. We were told that there was a back log and I appreciate that. But its still the need to know something. If he hadnāt rung it would have been further down the line. Thing is, it is a positive thing ā¦because as Iāve said before no news is good news!
I had a good review with my Gp this morning and hes not sure what the lightheadedness is, could be neurological, or not. But hes asked me to keep a diary if it continues to happenā¦so hey I get to write a novelā¦something Iāve always wanted to do hahahaha
Oh and I nearly forgotā¦my retirement has been accepted, just not sure when it comes into force yetā¦had to fill in a form on line. so things seem to be coming togetherā¦just like a good cake mix hehehe
have a good weekend all
catch ya later
Helenxxxx
Hi all
Just a quickie (one of these days Iāll do a proper one) - heard today that my mum is due to be discharged from hospital on Mon 6th Sept - so I can now have a bit of a breather, and charge up my own batteries once more, thank goodness.
Hugs to everyone
Rxxx
Hello everyone, Thanks for your kind words and for listening to me. I saw my Oncologist today and she is happy witht he way things are going just now. I have to go back in 3 months but if anything comes up I can contact her before then. My tumour markers are going up quite a lot each time I have them done. But as I am looking and feeling ok we have decided to let things be. We discussed going on to chemo again at a later date but it is not just nowā¦I have no time to be on chemo. My day is already filled looking after all the invalids in my house.
Dad is doing ok. His walking is not good and his hips and legs are very sore after the fall. I have noticed he cannot āfindā some words. This has happened before when he had a TIA. I took him in to see Mum at the nursing home. Mum was worse than himā¦very agitiaed as Dad wasnāt there at 2pm and took a funny dizzy turn herself as she was getting so worked up. Thw whole time we were there she did nothing but sigh. But when we got her talking I managed to get her to relax and make her smile about silly things that had been happening.
I took my OH to get his plastercast changed at the hospital as the one he had put on last week developed a hole in the heel and started to crumble! So new plaster now on but with the addition of a shoe thingy. I aaam usually a size 14/16 but by the time I get through all this caring lark I am going to be as skinny as I was in my youthā¦I was 8 stone when I got married! Never mind I AM COPINGā¦goodness knows where I am getting the stamina from but I bought loads of lovely wine in the supermarket on my way back from the hspital so intend to enjoy it ove rthe weekend. To hell with the ironingā¦the pile will just have to stay there. Love to all . Val (SL)
Good evening SRs,
Prelude to American holiday write-up
Iāve almost recovered from jet lag and forgotten just how unpleasant it can be. Morning flights are definitely preferable as they reduce the risk. Still, the night flight was only a small price to pay for the time away and the happy memories and experiences I hope to be able to look back on in the future.
I didnāt really use the laptop much whilst away except to upload the photos from the trip and to keep my e-diary up to date with the basic details of each day such as how we spent the time; what the weather was like; the people we met; and what we ate for lunch etc. I tended instead to spend most of the spare evening time reading as holidays are when I catch up with the books I collect during the year on my personal reading pile. I read three books on the trip. These were firstly A Kestrel for a Knave by Barry Hines, which I imagine every SR has read at some point, and as I did years ago as a class reader in English. It is a vivid book and just as I remembered it, about the last few months of a teenage boyās time in secondary school in a deprived area of the North of England before being almost certainly destined to follow the same life course as the rest of his family and the working class men of the area as a pit worker. The early starts on cold winter mornings, inadequate clothing, impoverished breakfasts, dysfunctional family background and lack of any real career prospects that the central character Billy Casper faced still filled me with the same strong sense of foreboding as when I was teenager myself. In fact, on reflection, it was probably a clever idea of my English teacher to cover this novel because the almost certain bleakness of adult life for Billy and his peers served to act as a motivator for me to want to do as well as I could at school; and to avoid at all costs a life spent under ground. Billy was only a few years older than us and I think my class saw what they thought was in store if they didnāt apply themselves at school even though in reality there was no chance of going down any mines as there were none in Surrey. I enjoyed re-reading the book again, as part of a summer reading programme at work: we were all invited to read an educationally themed book then write up a book review for colleagues.
The second book I read was a quirky little compilation of verse and line illustrations called The melancholy death of Oyster Boy: and other stories, by the film maker Tim Burton - which were essentially mini cautionary tales. The final book and my favourite was Her fearful symmetry by Audrey Niffeneger which was absolutely gripping. It is strong on plot, description, content and dialogue. Her fearful symmetry is Niffenegerās second novel published some seven years after the Time travelerās wife, which I havenāt read yet but promptly bought straight after completing her latest one. By coincidence Her fearful symmetry is half set in a suburb of Chicago called Lake Forest which I happened to be reading about as a potential place to visit when I was doing my preparatory holiday planning reading, whilst Niffeneger herself lives in another Chicago suburb called the City of Evanston which is actually where we stayed on the first four nights of the holiday. Evanston is a quiet leafy university town with small shops, water fountains in the town square and avenues of trees which are home to thousands of cicadas which sing at night, so loudly at times that they drown out what traffic there is on the road. Towards the opening of the book Niffeneger writes about a set of twins (who are the main characters) leaving Lake Forest and travelling by plane from Chicago to London ready to start their new lives in Highgate as part of their inheritance of their auntās estate. To go along with my other phobias such as dogs, the dark at night, and heights I have an annoying fear of flying, which I have just about managed to overcome so far or I would never by able to go abroad except by boat or train. Reading about the two girls Julia and Valentina Pooleās trouble-free flight over the Atlantic at the same time as my own flight in the opposite direction helped to calm my nerves and was certainly serendipitous. Highgate cemetery plays a central role in the plot and there is fascinating detail about the running of the cemetery, which Niffeneger came over to England to research even becoming a trained tour guide to help immerse herself in the story. The themes of the book are essentially relationships, possession beyond the grave, the afterlife and life in a London neighbourhood - all things Iām interested in.
There were many highlights from the holiday and some of them will be certain to lodge in the mind forever, the vivid ones that I made a conscious decision at the time to remember. Boarding the California Zephyr was one of these. I was struck by the sheer size of the train built on two levels, rather like some continental trains I have been on and covered in gleeming steel for design and strength so that it could withstand the 2,400 mile journey through challenging terrain including the Nevada desert. As soon as we boarded the Zephyr in the early afternoon in Chicago we went straight to the observation car that is positioned next to the dining car in the centre of the train where there are floor to ceiling windows and the most comfortable seating in the train. Apparently at one time the observation cars were open to the elements but these days they are enclosed which is a good thing because of the extreme temperatures and weather conditions: at one point our train was delayed by five hours due to electrical storms in Iowa which brought a huge tree down on the line and which required a team of tree surgeons to be brought in on another train to chop it up and remove it from the line. The conductor tried to present the delay as a positive as it meant passengers would go through Nebraska in the daylight rather than at night when the Zephyr normally passes through the state. To us Nebraska did not really offer any special sights of interest - only cornfields, grain silos and the odd small town otherwise in the middle of nowhere. Still I suppose there was novelty value for the few non US passengers who had never seen the Midwest plains before; and we won a competition for being the most distant visitors from the US narrowly beating the only other UK couple who lived in Derby. Our prize was a book about the Zephyr route from Grand Junction to Salt Lake City written by one of the rangers. Rangers board the train for certain stretches of the journey which are of most interest such as the American Rockies and provide a commentary on the route. The part of the commentary which most people seemed most interested in was the Donner Lake and going over the Donner Pass - which was where the Donner-Reed party settlers were snowed in for one winter in the late 19th C and some ended up resorting to cannibalism to stay alive (though the ranger did not mention this last part) - which is mentioned at the beginning of The Shining as Jack Nicholson and Shellay Duval drive to the Overlook hotel at the start of the film.
Other personal highlights for me were sitting on Baker Beach in San Francisco which looks across to the Golden Gate Bridge and seeing American Gothic in real life in the Art Institute of Chicago. Grant Woodās naive painting is one I took to early on in life when looking through my fatherās books on art. AIC is certainly a great gallery in terms of the number of iconic paintings in its impressionism and modern art collection and is now my favourite alongside the Pompidou in Paris. Meeting Mary a fb friend was something else I enjoyed and discovering what wonderful creatures ferrets are - they are so compliant, far more placid than cats, as Mary keeps three of these creatures as pets. I met Mary online when I was going through chemo and she was recovering from menigitis so there is a similar connection as with the SRs.
There were lows too such as the swollen ankles which have gone down now and reading that Cat has a secondary diagnosis.
ā¦ having written the above Iāve now forgotten all the posts. Too tired to read back - but thinking of you all.
Victoria xx
Morning all, Iāve opened the doors today as our morning person Theresa is still entertaining I expect
Hope youāre all doing okay, up with the lark this morning and off for my breakfast in Bath with a friend, we do this every 6 weeks and try not to miss.
Love your first installment Victoria, I think a publication may be in order, āVictoriaās Travelsā - I see a whole series ahead for you
Have a great day all, Di xxx
Carole, what on earth did you do to puncture the implant? No, donāt answer that, maybe that would be too much information. Seriously though, thatās a b@gger. Time for a bit of good luck for you I think. Vibes heading over the airwaves as I type.
Glad you had a good holiday Victoria, but donāt undo all the good by working too hard.
Talking about working too hard, take it easy Val and definitely no ironing! You too Rosie, rest up after your mad few weeks.
Great news about your retirement Helen and I hope the lightheadedness is only temporary.
After 5 weeks off Arimidex, I feel back to normal. Joint stiffness and pain gone, Achilles tendons normal, energy levels returning - whooooppppiiieeee! Rejoined the gym this weekend, so hoping to regain the fitness Iāve lost over the last few months. Note to self - donāt go crazy and wear yourself out!
Booked to see Les Mis/overnight stay in Oct with friends and Sister Act with B the previous week. Weāre having a day at the Sanctuary (my Christmas pressie - a bit late organising it but never mind) and then the show in the evening. Sooo, Iām heading out of Haven and heading for the border too.
Evening all.
Just back from a wonderfully relaxing holiday. It was HOT - >50c.
Iāve had a quick read but thereās been too much to remember it all.
Val (TOO), what a relief. Carole what rotten luck.
Helen and Victoria glad that you both had good hols.
Val (SL), you really are having a run of bad luck.
Sal itās good to hear that you feel so much better without the arimidex.
Sorry I canāt remember more. Will try and catch up a little more tomorrow.
Nicky xx