Hi everyone I’m not going.to lie, but I’m really not coping very well.
I got a callback following routine 3 yearly mammogram 10 day’s ago, had ultrasound, biopsy and another mammogram. There is 1 cm round white circle which the radiographer said looked like it needed treatment. Next appointment is a week on Wednesday.
Four months ago I was hit at 100mph on the motorway by a drunk and drugged up driver and I’m still suffering from the whiplash and after effects.
I thought that maybe seatbelt damage in my right breast may have shown up but no, Im in such shock.
I’m 60 always been fit and healthy and am my 95 year old mums carer who has vascular dementia and no mobility.
I am at a loss as to how I’m going to cope and also protect my mum from this diagnosis.
I’m single with no children or siblings. My friends have enough on their plate to help.
And yes I’m vain. I have long thick hair and FF cup boobs. I’m not brave like so many of you on here, and I just wont cope with losing hair and a boob - this is so crap, sorry
Welcome to the forum @chelseagirl . You will not be short of support on this forum should you need it. If you should get “bad” news breast cancer is a very treatable cancer for the vast majority diagnosed, particularly those diagnosed via screening programme which are often very early stage. Best wishes Jill x
Hello @chelseagirl
Welcome to the forums and I’m sorry to hear you find yourself here and how anxious you are about the possibility of being diagnosed with breast cancer
What you are feeling at this point is entirely understandable and every “brave” lady you hear or read about dealing with a breast cancer diagnosis has been where you are now.
However until you are definitively told you don’t have breast cancer: if the tests come back negative in all probability you will beat yourself up for worrying so much, but as @Jill1998 says if the news is that you have cancer please be assured that breast cancer is extremely treatable and there are plenty of us here on the forums and in real life who are living proof of life after breast cancer.
Wishing you all the best for your follow up appointment
AM xxx
Hi @chelseagirl I just wanted to say that I was also a carer for my mother who lived with vascular dementia and I know how all-encompassing and stressful it can be. My beloved Mum died 15 months before my diagnosis but dealing with both would have been challenging. If, and at the moment it is a big if, it turns out to breast cancer, I believe you can involve social services to provide extra support for your Mum whilst you go through and then recover from treatment. I know bringing in new people can be very difficult for someone with dementia but you’re going to have to put yourself first in the short term otherwise you’ll not be able to care for her as effectively as you want to in the medium to long term.
Secondly on the appearance front, you are unlikely to lose your hair unless you have to have chemo. 70% of BC patients do not have to have chemo. I didn’t and, like you, I was recalled from a routine mammogram although I was 66 at the time. My lump was 1.4 cm so bigger than yours. That was 3 years ago and I have just had my 3rd annual check up mammogram and it’s fine. I don’t know the percentages of those who have mastectomies but it is less than half. I have kept my 36GG boobs through having a lumpectomy. As @adoptedmanc says, early detection is key which is what you’ve had.
I doubt that anyone who has a breast cancer diagnosis would consider themselves “brave”. You just have to get through it, there isn’t much choice about it. You’re at the scary point at the moment, when you don’t know if you’ve got breast cancer and, if you do, what type it is and what the treatment plan will be. Once you have all of that information in a couple of weeks, the cancer part will seem more doable but please look into what help social services could offer for your Mum.
None of us are particularly brave either. But it was either choose surgery, choose whatever treatment was recommended or die. And we all chose not to die. You will, too, and you will learn to cope with whatever happens. It seems insurmountable right now but one step at a time you get through it. Wishing you the best with your mom. Perhaps there are services that can help.
Hi chelseagirl,
Sorry to find you here, but you did the right thing reaching out for support. It’s really terrifying when we go through this initially, and waiting for biopsy results is absolutely
the worst time of all.
Fundamentally this is why we have screening mammograms isn’t it. Sometimes they do find things, but in that scenario it’s usually been found very early - as was my case. They’ve obviously found something that needs investigating. Please remember that just because biopsies are done, doesn’t mean you have cancer. They are done to rule out cancer fundamentally and analyse what’s there. This could be a cyst or many other benign conditions. If not, and it is a BC then it will be dealt with and you will be very well looked after. So many of us do well after a diagnosis.
I too looked after my mother with vascular dementia for 18 months before she went into a home. It’s so hard to deal with isn’t it. I know all the stress of dealing with her care heightened my anxiety about everything which may be a reason why you are finding it hard to keep perspective at this difficult time for you too.
Good luck with everything. Try and keep busy to distract yourself until you know.
All the best x