Hi can anyone help my depression has been bad since starting chemo I’m so scared and feel like chemo is going to kill me I know it sounds stupid but it’s how I feels I’m so scared something is going to happen I really anxious and can’t stop racing thoughts can anyone suggest anything that could help.???
Hi Angelmoubjr33
I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling this way, I hope this Forum provides a space for you to learn about how other people have managed their depression and anxiety.
In the mean time, here are some links that you may find helpful:
breastcancernow.org/information-support/facing-breast-cancer/living-beyond-breast-cancer/lif…
breastcancernow.org/about-us/news-personal-stories/10-ways-overcome-anxiety-when-worry-gets-…
breastcancernow.org/about-us/news-personal-stories/my-anxiety-stopped-me-seeing-future
breastcancernow.org/about-us/news-personal-stories/podcast-discussion-alice-may-managing-her…
Wishing you all the best 
Chiara
Hi @Angelmoubjr33 - it’s really good that you have reached out on here and I’m sure others will be along to share their stories too. Chiara has also sent you some useful links to try.
First of all, your fears do NOT sound at all stupid. I can totally understand your fear of chemo - when I arrived for my first chemo I sat down in the chair, then got up and tried to run away. My lovely nurse followed me and gently persuaded me to come back, telling me I owed it to myself to do all I could to get rid of the BC. Don’t feel afraid to tell your chemo nurse about your fears, they will then do even more to help you. Also try to remember that the doctors have to tell us, for legal reasons, about all the possible side effects, but that doesn’t mean you will suffer from all, or indeed any. If you have any worries or concerns, for example a raised temperature, or any other side effect do call the chemo helpline - they should have given you a number. I called whenever I was worried, I felt like a nuisance but they don’t see it that way - they want and need to know so they can treat anything, and quickly.
Have you joined the monthly chemo thread on here - I’m guessing April if you are going through treatment now? Let me know if you would like me to send the link.
Also, being hit with a BC diagnosis is like being hit by a bus that came out of nowhere. The mental side is very very hard to deal with, so don’t be hard on yourself because you feel as you do. I had chemo about 4 years ago and came on here for support. One excellent piece of advice I received was to try to take things one day at a time, or even one hour at a time when things got especially tough.
Regarding your depression, can you speak to your GP or BC team to see what they can offer for help? Are you already seeing a counsellor? Apologies for mentioning things I’m sure you are already doing.
Please keep chatting on here anytime, with questions or if you just want to chat. Sending big gentle hugs, Evie xx
The most important thing I would say it’s don’t be hard on yourself for feeling depressed it’s perfectly normal during and after treatment. All your love ones say things like stay positive, you’re a fighter you will get through this and other unhelpful terms. Its not their fault they don’t know what yo say. But is can make us feel weak or a failure for being depressed. I was put on anti depressants during and after treatment. It really helped me as I live alone so needed it if I’m honest and they did help me cope. This forum though is the best place to start to get advice and know you are not alone. Sending hugs xxx
Chemo is scary, I will never forget how hard I cried during my first treatment. I only can say that this will pass, before you know it you will be on your last treatment ringing that bell!!! Keep your eye on the prize, there will be moments that you feel like giving up but keep pushing. The end result is worth it!
I do not know much medical terms, I had cancer. And now I not somehow good. Right now chemo continues…
The treatment went on for a long time, now I am healthy, but I cannot say accurate about my health.
My parent’s efforts could not be successful for my marriage. Due to which I live in a lot of depression, have taken online therapy for depression and
it is still going on form
Expressive Therapy For Depression [Expressive Therapy for Depression(Expressive Therapy for Depression
But I know that now my old days can never come back, everything has changed, my face, my voice, Even all the relationships have changed now.
Now I have to learn to live like this or else I can go into a lot of depression, and I am afraid not to do anything wrong.