Is anyone else struggling after the death of Sarah Harding. I have gone straight back to being diagnosed but my husband is really angry at me for feeling like this, he says I should be grateful, which I understand, but it has made me so scared again.
Hi Lissyjay
Yeh, I was shocked to read it on the front page, when I picked up my daily paper today. I didn’t even know who she was, I’m afraid (age, so a bit out of touch with more recent pop stars!). However famous, doesn’t matter. It was the fact that she was a beautiful, YOUNG woman, who died from terminal BC at 39!!! That’s no age.
Frightening it is, Yes. And I don’t think ANY of us, who have experienced BC, aren’t left with a seed of doubt, that is always going to be there. No matter how many years ago, and so called “clear” (My 1st 15yrs ago, 2nd 14yrs ). Such news is bound to “shake” you, any of us. Knocks you, makes you wobbly, and brings it back to the forefront of your mind.
Yes, there are certain things we can do, to hopefully avoid it. But this gawd awful bleepin disease can happen even to the healthiest (and wealthiest) of people, who’ve never smoked, drink very little, eat healthily, regularly exercise, are ultra-fit, and don’t share any genetic history of it.
I said this, only recently, to Evie, another Forum member and a brill supporter, that I’ve become quite blasee about it now. I don’t think “What If”. In other words, I don’t LIVE in “fear of it” any more. If it happens - it happens. Obviously hope it doesn’t And I’m not being or wishing to sound arrogant in all that, I think it’s just been time that’s allowed me to feel this way. Hopefully it will you too, given time.
But yeh, it’s still a shock and a reminder.
With regards to your husband, it’s always going to be difficult for anyone to understand, when they haven’t been through it themselves. That’s what’s so great about this Forum, and why it was set up in the first place, to be in touch with others who HAVE, therefore have a deeper understanding and empathy.
Sending a big hug, and lots of love to you, Delly xXx
Hi @Lissyjay - you’ve already received some wise and comforting words from lovely Delly, so I’m not sure what I can add but I wanted to drop in to say that yes the news shook me too. It always does when I read similar stories, it’s so very sad. After treatment I really think it’s a rollercoaster of ups and downs. Sometimes we can lock away negative thoughts but then something happens to bring it to the front of our minds again - I especially struggle around diagnosis date. This forum is such a lifeline, a place where we can come and share thoughts, with others who know exactly what we mean without having to explain. Family and friends are well meaning in wanting us to “move on” but unless you’ve been through this you can never really understand. Sending you big hugs, Evie xx