Hi all, my mom has recently been diagnosed with breast cancer, HER 2 and luminal B. My mom lives abroad unfortunately. She is starting chemo in a few and I would like to be there to support her through some of the cycles. If I could I would love to be there for all of it but unfortunately I won’t be able to with work. We have been thinking of when would be the best/most meaningful/ time she would need it the most for me to be there to support her and look after her, and because we haven’t been through it we don’t know when the toughest time is, considering side effects etc. I have read a lot of posts on here and it seems that very few people have very bad side effects after the first chemo and that it’s after the second and third that it becomes harder. Obviously any time would be valuable and meaningful to be there no doubt, but if it is likely that she would be able to manage the first cycle on her own and it would be better for me to be there later on then that is what we are trying to figure out. Could anyone perhaps shed some light on this ? My understanding is that she will start with ACT regimen and then have TCH regimen after ? Thank you for the help
I’m sorry to hear about your mom but she’s fortunate to have a daughter like you to put so much thought into things. Please don’t google - you’ll terrify yourself and then have to pretend in front of your mom. My opinion is quite simple - ask your mom. Some people feel ok about chemo, some (myself included) are terrified. I would have desperately wanted you there the first time but maybe would have wanted to protect you from the unknown.
As for side effects, there are rarely any during treatment (they seem to have that sorted nowadays) but there’s no predicting what follows. I was wiped out from Day 5 (after the steroid boost) but didn’t want to see anyone. I’d have been lousy company at any time but I needed looking after probably 2/3 of each cycle (not the same drugs as your mom). However, I’m told I was one of the unlucky few. Maybe your mom will cope better and be able to identify specific times when you can be of most benefit to her and you can enjoy each other’s company.
I hope everything goes well for her.