Hi,
My mum is due to start her chemo next week and I just want to be able to offer her as much support and encouragement as possible, so looking for advice really. She is in her 60’s and I am 35, she is a great mum and glamorous granny and has always been the one doing all the supporting so it’s hard now the roles are reversed.
She had a bilateral mastectomy at the start of July, having been diagnosed with lobular, stage 2, HER-, Hormone positive. She has done brilliantly since her op but is currently having to put up with seromas which are very uncomfortable.
I feel so bad for her that she is having to start chemo on top of not feeling 100% recovered from surgery. I think it can be dificult for family members as we often feel a bit useless and just want to help as much as we can.
sending positive thoughts to everyone.
Gem x x
Hi Gem. Sorry to hear that your Mum is on this journey, but it’s great that you are there to support her. This forum is a fantastic source of support and advice. There are monthly threads in the ‘going through treatment’ section, under the ‘Chemotherapy’ subject. I don’t think there’s an August thread yet though. Do you know what chemo your Mum will be having? Lots of us are having/have had FEC-T, but there are quite a few other chemo regimes too. There is also a section of the forum called ‘supporting someone with breast cancer’, so it’s worth having a look there too.
I had seromas after my surgery and they can be drained if they are really uncomfortable. The relief is instant, but they quite often come back so may need draining a few times. Sending very best wishes to your Mum, and a hug for you too xx
Thanks Tweasel I will take a look at the other sections in the forum. Yes it’s FEC-T that mum will be having so I’ve been trying to read up on tips to help her through. I’m finding this website and forum a great source of info and advice x
Hi Emeraldrose and welcome to the BCC forums, it sounds like you and your Mum are a great support to,each other and I am sure you will find the extra help you need from your fellow forum users
We have a long running thread called ‘Top tips for chemo’ which may also help, you can read this here:
forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Chemotherapy/Top-tips-to-help-get-you-through-Chemotherapy/td-p/304687
Our helpliners are also on hand for both of you with practical and emotional support so do feel free to call , lines are open 9-5 weekdays and 10-2 Saturdays on 0808 800 6000
You may also find some threads running in the family and friends area helpful as some are similar situations to yours:
forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Family-partners-and-friends/bd-p/4451
Take care
Lucy BCC
H Gem… Sorry to hear about your mum xxx
ive only had one FEC-T so far, my advise is take everyday as it comes, each day brings different things, some days sleep some days tears , being there and helping your mum with all of the effect will make it a lot better for her xxx
pis glammy worried about hair loss? Is such a big thing for most ladies… I tried the cold cap… Post chemo 9days it started falling and still falling… My next one is on Monday… No cold cap I’m just going to have deal with it xx sending you both love xx
Thanks Lucy and Annapanda.
mum has decided against using the coldcap her oncologist was saying it can cause discomfort and headaches etc so she just didn’t feel it was worth it. I think she will be glad to just get started with the treatment on Thursday she will get to choose her wig that day but she is thinking she will mostly wear scarves. she is also getting her hair cut into a very short style as she felt that the hair loss might be less upsetting that way. Thanks for all your replies x
So my mum Had her first chemo session on Thursday. She’s having problems with her veins so is scheduled for a picc line before her 2nd cycle which I think will be good and hopefully make things less stressful. She managed to get out of bed this afternoon for an hour or so which is a positive. Can you ladies give any insight into how she’s likely to be feeling in the upcoming week or so? One of the nurses was saying that by day 7 mum should be feeling relatively normal albeit very tired, is this correct? I’ve just been popping in to check on my
And help my dad around the house with some cleaning etc and keeping him company as he’s obviously worried for her. Feel a bit useless really. X
Hopefulholly thank you so much for taking time to reply in such detail, I really appreciate that. I have found this forum a godsend during this time. We live in Northern Ireland so don’t have the yellow card but have access to a 24 hour number at the hospital which they say ring if at all unsure or concerned. If I can work out how to private message on here I will stay in contact. I hope that you are feeling well after your third cycle Holly, you sound like a lovely lady and I send you all my very best wishes.
Gemma x x
So we are on day 6 and mum is feeling much better, which is such a relief. She has ordered some scarves etc in preparation for the hairloss and the hospital hairdresser has ordered in some wigs for her to try out next week. From what I’ve read day 15 seems to be when a lot of ladies start to lose their hair so I guess that is the next hurdle. Just so happy to see my mum feeling more like herself.
love to you all x x