I am new here and feeling a little apprehensive. Saw GP with suspected lump last Wednesday and attended hospital today. Five hours later, mammograms, ultrasound and biopsy I have been told that I have a cancerous lump and will return next Wednesday to the hospital to discover my fate! Its all a bit surreal to me at the moment and I am feeling a waive of emotions, tears and disbelief one minute then anger and its not fair the next. Is this normal??? I am scared and feel alone regardless of all the people around me, feel guilty for worrying family particularly my 23 year old son. Worry my husband is going to try to hide his true feelings so as not to worry me…is this normal. I realise that I am by no means alone in this journey and that makes it a little less of a bitter pill to swallow.
Hi minnimix you are certainly not alone and have just joined the biggest support group you could all the ladies on here have been my lifeline to laugh cry and rant toothey all amazing.You are so normal feeling all these rollercoaster of emotions especially just being diagnosed it all seeems so scarey and unreal but you will feel calmer and better when you meet with youre dr and you know youre treatment plan …This in-limbo part before starting treatment is definately the wworst part.I found it helpfull to take my OH and my daughter(26y) with me to bc nurse appointment and they heard what I heard and could ask ttheir questions and once they realise that the treatment now is so much better and more than85-90% now survive aand live healthy lives after bc they will be able to support you through your treatment, and believe me they will be stronger than you think.I was distraught at the thought of telling my daughter and 80 year old parents but they have been my rock.please message me anytime ffor any help or advice through your treatment and although the road seems long and scarey you will get there xx take care Julie
Hi everything you have mentioned is normal. It’s the shock that did it for me. You are not alone which you probably feel and why has it happened to you. Just all I can say is stay in touch, lovely people on here and chat as much as you can. Talking is good. I found my breast cancer nurse amazing, hopefully you’ll be assigned one soon.
Don’t read too much about Cancer just wait for what they tell you is happening and then ask them and talk about your worries.
Thinking of you at this horrible time xxx
Firstly, welcome to the Forums, I’m sure you’ll find them a great source of support and advice.
Whilst you’re waiting for others to reply, I just wanted to tell you about a couple of things which you may find of help. Also wanted to say, that the feelings you are experiencing are perfectly normal and understandable. The waiting for treatment to start is always difficult.
If you feel it might help to talk, do try giving the Helpline a call they’re great listeners and can direct you to other sources of information and support. The number is 0808 800 6000 and they’re open Weekdays 9-5 and Saturday 9-2.
Also, here’s the link to our Resources Pack for those diagnosed with primary breast cancer, it’s filled with information to help you better understand your diagnosis, test results and the various treatments available:
Hi Minnimix, my heart goes out to you luv , I am about 2 weeks ahead of you, Its scary and you don’t know what to think, the waiting is horrendous, but you will get through it , take each day at a time ,tell people how you are feeling, its usually a relief to them because they are worried about upsetting you and are glad that they don’t have to hide feelings.You are not alone , I have found so much help, advice and friendship from people on here . I have still to start my treatment but feel very positive now,there’s always someone with a similar diagnosis to yourself so you don’t feel so isolated.Good Luck and welcome onboard this special group of people.
Jean
Don’t feel that you have to go round telling everybody, you haven’t had the time to get your own head round it yet. Take your time, do it at your own pace.
The BCC publications are really really helpful, so have a look at the Worried and Recently Diagnosed ones. If you want to find out a little bit more, look at MacMillan’s info, Cancer Research, BCC - reputable sites - but don’t go bananas looking at all the stuff until you’ve got a bit more news about YOUR OWN diagnosis. You can easily end up terrifying yourself and convincing yourself you’re going to die by the end of the week. (Even if you do, or have done already, you won’t be the first person to do so.)
The Waiting Room is absolutely the pits and you’ll probably find you’re in and out of The Waiting Room A LOT, particularly at the beginning before you start active treatment.
Get hold of a notebook and write down all of your questions. THERE ARE NO SILLY QUESTIONS. You can ask them on here if they’re general questions, or ask your surgeon, oncologist or breast care nurse.
And make as much use of the forums as you need to. I’ve been practically living on here for the last three months and have found amazing support.
Hello there, welcome but also so sorry you had to join us. Just want to echo that the first few weeks while the tests and treatment plan are done is the worst cos its all news news news…as soon as you have your plan it gets better. I am a year ahead of you and it was tough but not impossible but the first two to three weeks were the eardests cos of the shock. be kind to yourself, Nicola
Thank you so much for welcoming me and for helping me to realise that all the emotions and feelings I am experiencing are quite normal. I managed to have a good sleep last night having not slept at all the night before but I am really struggling today. I need to keep myself busy so as not to have to think about what I found out yesterday but at the same time I find myself walking around like an idiot because I just cannot settle to any one thing…hopeless!! One positive thing is I already feel like you guys are going to be part of my extended family and be another part of the support network and for that I thank you all very much.
Miniminx - there are so many possible distraction activities - I mainly chose food and drink, but whatever suits you, feel free to do it, dvds, exercise, whatever, just to help get through the time you need to get through…Nicola