And so it begins. 2 cycles done since yesterday : 6 to go 
docorubicin/ cyclophosphamide combined (A:C).. Today is day 15 Zero side effects which is great. I feel perfect. but the hair is coming out by the second. I can hardly brush it . It sounds so vain but this for. me is actually the worst part. I can cope with everything but this. It’s awful I admire all u ladies who can brave the shave. But I just could never do it I feel like my life is ruined I’m so sick of the crap and I’m only starting I miss my old life. My holidays. My good life I know it’s not forever and I sound so selfish but I can’t help it. 
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you are not selfish, you are trying your best take it a day at a time, step by step, treatments can change along the way as your team tailors them specifically for you, it’s hard but you will find your drum beat, treat yourself to something after each treatment a new lippy a new necklace a new perfume, a cup of tea sat outside listening to the birds, it’s a bit like going into a chrysalis during chemo but you do come through and get your butterfly wings out tge other side my hair started falling out in hospital after I was hospitalised after my first chemo. When I got home I shaved it off, it allowed me to feel in control a bit of that makes sense do ring the number on here and speak to a nurse and keep posting on here, we’re all here to listen and share as much or as little as you need 
Shi xx
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@mai3 you are so totally allowed to feel like this. Don’t give yourself a hard time. Like you I have minimaL side effects so far but I’m also cross and frustrated. Had last week’s chemo cancelled as I’m neutropenic even though I feel absolutely fine. Which is now going to mess with my May holiday plans. I shaved my hair but it’s still coming out in (short) handfuls. It’s everywhere! I want my holidays and gym classes and social life back too. I’ve already missed two hiking trips in sunny Europe because of surgery and now this. I could rail on and on about it. So feel free!
Main thing is to hang on in there and try to find some positives from it all. Weather is finally better. Birds are singing. You could feel really ill but you don’t. Find a friend to have a walk or coffee with (even if it’s take-out). Treat yourself. But don’t feel bad for being angry. It’s normal and completely allowed!
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Hi there - I was shocked when my hair started coming away in bunches about 15 days after first chemo sessions. I held onto it for my girlie Christmas do, then day after went to my hairdresser and he shaved both mine and husbands hair off for us! Felt weirdly ok after the initial shock. You learn to love yourself again I promise and I ordered eyebrow tattoos from Amazon (game changer) and taught myself how to apply false eyelashes - these little things gave me the confidence to go out . We are all here to listen and help if you need it xx
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