I wanted to share my experience in case it resonates with anyone who’s ever felt torn between different advice.
In 2023 I was diagnosed with right-sided breast cancer with lymph-node involvement. My options were laid out clearly: chemotherapy at one hospital, radiotherapy at another, and long-term hormonal treatment managed elsewhere. Three teams, three systems, and very little communication between them. It felt fragmented, impersonal, and risky.
After many sleepless nights, I made a decision that surprised even me. I chose surgery to remove the tumours and nodes, and then focused on restoring my health through an integrative approach — nutrition, physical recovery, stress reduction, and complementary therapies under professional guidance. I’ve kept up with all imaging and follow-up appointments, and I’m grateful to say that my two-year ultrasound and MRI are both clear of detectable disease.
I completely respect that most people choose the standard route and that for many it’s the right choice. My intention isn’t to criticise conventional medicine, but to acknowledge that informed decisions can look different for each of us. What matters is understanding why we choose what we do and staying engaged with medical monitoring so that nothing slips through the cracks.
I’m sharing this because sometimes it can feel as though there are only two stories told … the “success after full treatment” one and the “tragedy of refusal” one. Real life can sit somewhere in between: cautious, questioning, and still hopeful.
Sending strength to everyone navigating this complicated road.
I have really struggled with life after diagnosis as find it very difficult to make decisions with my crazy menopausal brain. I want to follow my gut, but you don’t really hear that many stories of people who choose a slightly different road! Thank you so much for sharing and huge well done on advocating for yourself.
I am really at a bit of a cross roads as am suffering hugely from menopausal effects on my brain. I can feel the stress in my body and am trying to fix this without HRT, but feel like I am just getting worse. I am trying acupuncture, meditiation, being more active, no alcohol, but just feel rubbish!
Hi @bryndle, I too followed a non-standard path although my oncologist recorded it in my notes as sub optimal. I started with EC chemo and then had surgery (choosing mastectomy to avoid radiotherapy). HER2 was equivocal so I had 9 x Herceptin. I refused Paclitaxol, and bi-phosphonates. I gave Letrozole a try but stopped after 11months after gynae issues. I have also passed the two year mark. My focus is on relaxation, healthy eating, exercise, managing my type 1 diabetes, and focussing on helping others in various volunteer roles as well as being a good friend and neighbour. I check myself on the first day of each month and attend all my scans. No-one knows what the future may hold but I too concentrate on living and living well. I have also found great support via Penny Brohn and ‘Yes to Life’ X
Hi
I was diagnosed a week ago with IDC grade 2 er 8.
I am having a masectomy but am worried about being on the hormone tablets for the next 10 years. I would rather try the holistic route.
Any advise on where to start would be appreciated.
Thank you
I think it very much depends on where you are in the UK. I’m lucky and near(ish) to London which seems super saturated with Natural Therapists. I first reached out to our local Homeopath but she had just retired and she suggested I try Iris Hay (https://www.irishaynaturaltherapies.co.uk/). I would recommend that you find someone equally as qualified as Iris as you don’t want to be attempting to navigate this on your own. She may be able to help you find someone in your area?
I think it is wonderful you have taken a positive decision and control of your path. I went a middle way and took the radiotherapy as recommended but refused the hormone treatment, I’m happy with the decision now I have taken it.
I do think every woman should be encouraged to weigh up her own individual risks and choose what is the best quality of life decision for her. For me that means healthy living and monitoring rather than drugs which can make exercise and daily living very difficult - albeit provide extra protection. But everyone is different and it would be nice if the medical profession would just recognise that and let us make rational decisions that are right for us - which can mean every treatment option or to refuse some.
I’m so glad you shared your thoughts. Thank you so much! I also had cancer in my right breast. I did surgery, chemo, and radiotherapy, as you wrote all different places. I started the hormone blockers 1,6 years ago, and I hate every day with it. I decided to take a break, I don’t take the pills, and I postponed zoladex. I’m almost a week without tamoxifen and I feel much better, I have more energy less depressed thoughts. I also have MS, so menopause is extremely harsh on my nervous system. To be honest, I didn’t even want to get started with this therapy, and I’m sure I won’t make it 5 years. I tried to hold on for 3 years, but it’s such a misery. Sleepless nights, sweating, total brainfog, extreme fatigueness… I’m scared of next week to go back to this zombie-like state with non-stop sweating.
My tumour was 95% ER+, so I’m of course scared that I will have recurrence, but it will be after 5 years… No one can guarantee anything.
I hope you will be in good health, I support you in everything, and I really consider my choices.
Hi @bryndle thank you for this post.
I am also exactly 2 years in from a diagnosis very similar to yours (only difference is that I also carry the BRAC2 Gene mutation)
I had radiotherapy and then took part in a trial of a non chemo route.
I decided to tske the hormone treatment - tamoxifen and ovarian suppression - but stopped short of an AI as I felt the possible benefits outweighed the possible risks.
I have been on ovarian suppression for 18 months and although my side effects are not awful, the hot flushes are a struggle and I do think about stopping, possibly at the 2 year mark. Alongside the traditional treatment I have changed my diet and prioritised exercise and do feel this is at least as helpful as medication, especially as it contributes to, rather than detracts from, my overall health.
I would love to hear more about your experience, what lifestyle things you do/have done etc. and also how you came to your decision.
Thanks again for posting about this xxx
Thank you so much for the link to the Homeopath.
I have my mastectomy next month and then chemotherapy.
I think i have decided i wont be taking the tablets and will be going down the holistic route.
On another note i have been getting paid in my breast but have been told that has nothing to do with the cancer.
Anyone else experienced any pain in the breast?
Thank you.
I’ve had no pain at all (ever) until the last MRI (with contrast). Since then there has been a “stinging” sensation in the nipple. It will be interesting to see if this subsides. Consultant is aware of it and is not concerned.
I’ve changed my diet quite a lot, decreased alcohol, creating food from scratch, steering clear of processed food etc - but excercise has been a problem. I snapped the ACL in my right knee 20 years ago and the surgery to fix it failed. As a consequence I have arthritic changes in my Left Hip which make excercise very painful. I’m currently waiting for that to get sorted, then I can get on with the rest of my life!
To be honest I was scared to post here at all - I thought that all of the posts were very Chemo/Radio/hormone blocker positive and that anything that bucked that trend would be frowned upon or deleted. It’s refreshing that so many women have felt empowered enough to decline some or all of the treatments offered by the NHS.
I’m sorry for the misery you’re going through. I have Lyme on top of everything else and that was a major factor in refusing the chemo - the oncologist hadn’t a clue how the drugs she was proposing would react with the Lyme spirochetes … her words were, “I’ve googled it, you’ll be fine”.
I was reading recently that dietary changes make an 80% impact and exercise makes a 20% difference. Chair yoga is popular with many of my cancer pals. I guess one has to find what works best whilst taking account of other health conditions. X
I think it was brave to share your story with us. I completely understand your point. The doctor, OMG how she can’t say something like that… at least my neurologist discussed other doctors and checked online medical forums on how MS and chemotherapy work together. It wasn’t much information, of course… But I had to continue with IV, because my MS is also sensitive. (It was my worst experience in my life. Taxol and MS was extremely painful.
How they are treating your Lyme? How are you doing with it?
I have RA and have stopped taking the medication in prep for my mastectomy. I am seeing a Dr next week to see of i can have reconstruction at the time of the mastectomy but my consultant has said it may be to high risk to do it at the same time.
I am pretty healthy but am finding it so hard to exercise at the moment. I have no energy.
If i feel like this before the op, how am i going to move my body after!
Any advice please.
I also had cancer in my right breast. I did surgery, chemo, and radiotherapy, as you wrote all different places. I started the hormone blockers 1,6 years ago, and I hate every day with it. I decided to take a break, I don’t take the pills, and I postponed zoladex. I’m almost a week without tamoxifen and I feel much better, I have more energy less depressed thoughts. I also have MS, so menopause is extremely harsh on my nervous system. To be honest, I didn’t even want to get started with this therapy, and I’m sure I won’t make it 5 years. I tried to hold on for 3 years, but it’s such a misery. Sleepless nights, sweating, total brainfog, extreme fatigueness… I’m scared of next week to go back to this zombie-like state with non-stop sweating.