I’m having trouble with coping psychologically with an unexpected positive mammogram in January then waiting. First for biopsy results, then surgery, then tissue results from surgery, then further revision surgery and now results from this. People were wonderful and super sympathetic initially- my house was a forest of flowers after my first op. Now it’s a grind, and recovering from the second op has been physically easier but not much better emotionally. My family keep forgetting I’ve had an operation just this week and am not supposed to lift, reach up or drive and I feel like they think I’m malingering a bit. All I can think about is how awful it will be if I still don’t have clear normal tissue margins when the results come back and what that will then mean for more surgery and treatment. 3 weeks seems like a very long time to wait anxiously. I want to get a treatment plan before going back to work so I’m not an emotional mess but it’s going to be problematic financially if it all goes on months longer.
I’m more noticing my totally lopsided boobs and how they look to other people. As weather gets warmer my massive cardigans won’t be so useful anymore.
Anyway, I’m feeling very sorry for myself.
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Hello, I totally empathise. I had a similar experience and the waiting is definitely the worst part. But the waiting is because they are very thorough, checking and double checking to make sure the treatmemt plan is right for you. I think it is natural that the initial shock, concern and support from those around you drops off a bit but it doesn’t mean they don’t care. It’s really hard for them too.
I found that keeping busy and finding distractions was some help. I just wanted to say that I had a single mastectomy without reconstruction. I often go out lop-sided and I really don’t think anyone notices and my remaining boob isn’t small! On the odd occassion that I think someone has clocked it they don’t seem to care. Why would they?
I do hope you get your results soon. Hang in there x
@laneycass Flat on the left & G cup on the right. It is what it is-anyone wants to stare they’ll be getting a big smile back from me as I’m alive! Xx
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Thank you both! I feel slightly more positive today. I’ve just got to enjoy the spring sun and breathe!
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Hi
I’m in a similar situation. First op showed unclear margins and cancer in the lymph nodes so now I’ve got my second surgery next week. I think the psychological impact is so much worse isn’t it. If anything when things don’t go to plan we are actually in a worse state than we were with our initial surgery. Lots of thinking the worst, lots of what ifs. My partner has been very supportive but as time passes my cancer becomes the norm and people forget what it actually means for you. I don’t really have any advice but I can empathise. We are all navigating this awful journey, hoping to get safely to our destination of recovery. My thoughts are with you, chin up and bloody well remind them that you are still going through the wringer. Much love 
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Thanks! I hope it goes well next week. Physically my second surgery was easier to recover from and I hope yours is too.
Wise words all round.