Since being diagnosed I found I have watershed things in my life e.g. clearing out a box that been around forever, not bothering with people I used to put up with. Throwing out things from my wardrobe I had kept but did not really want / like deep down. I have found this soothing, rewarding, theraputic and see it as the way things will be once all treatment ends i.e. out with the old, the rubbish, the clutter, keep only what is really worth having in life.
However, prior to diagnosis I had been reflecting inwardly on my relationship with my husband for sometime. We have been together 24years. We are married and have one child. Although we get on, he spends a lot of time at work (I accept this) but when at home on his PC or with our daughter. I’m usually excluded. He does not want to move and or take holidays. He is a good father and a pleasant man but I’m not fulfilled. I both work and look after the home. I’ve spoken to him about the situation several times but to no avail. Since being diagnosed he seems even more distant but he is sympathetic and supportive in many ways. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life like this.
Recently and totally unexpectedly I have fallen in love with a visitor of another patient at the hospital. At first they were in the background and I did not take notice him. Then suddenly I found myself laughing, joking… I felt close and at ease with them. lt was like a thunderbolt out of the blue. Unexpected. I did not see it coming, it just suddenley was. This included spending time just gazing into eacthothers eyes. I think others noticed? Given all the above I cannot see that my relationship with my partner can survive. Things have gone no further and I will not contact and this man as experience has told me it does not work and I’ll get hurt. I’m moving onto other treatment now at a different hospital so will not bump into him again but I’m left with terrible pangs, a yearning for them. Is anyone else watershedding or has fallen for somebody else whilst having treatment? 
Hi Rhubarb
I found your story so interesting. I’m replying even though I haven’t watershedded anything, or fallen for anyone else. But the fact that you have discovered you can love another in the midst of all you are going through is very heart warming and I wish you luck with your feelings and hope you can find some way to resolve your situation.
Best Wishes
Poemsgalore xx