What to do following second mastectomy - advice needed

Hi, I was diagnosed with breast cancer around 12 months ago and had to have a right mastectomy.  I asked if I could have both breasts removed, but was advised that I could not because there was no need.  To prevent me being lopsided, I therefore opted for a Right Diep reconstruction. At the same time, my left breast was reduced. The operation itself went ok, but I had major problems with skin necrosis and healing on my Diep side.
However, when the tissue from my left side was examined, it showed that I also have issues on that side and I am now in a position of having a second mastectomy - this time on my left side.
The problem is - what do I do with it?
I have used my abdomen and so cannot use it again for further reconstruction;
I can have reconstruction with tissue taken from my back or inner thigh, but I do not feel comfortable with either of these sites being used;
I could have an implant on the left, but my consultant has said it will not match my right Diep and so I could end up with a “bad match”;
Or should I cut my losses and go flat on either one side, or both?
I feel like I only had one shot at reconstruction and now it’s gone.  Why on earth didn’t they let me have both breasts removed in the first place?
Any advice would be much appreciated, especially people’s experiences of going flat, or having reconstruction with tissue taken from their inner thigh or buttock.

Hi Linda, sorry you have this difficult decision. I’m sorry I cannot answer your main questions but hope others who can will be along soon. I just wonder why your consultant is so negative about an implant? Lots of us have one implant and one natural breast (I’ve had mx with implant recon on my left and a 2nd primary on the right which only needed lumpectomy). True, they do not move the same way or match perfectly, but i didnt have the option of a flap recon. I’m very happy with how I look, you can see no difference in a bra or bikini, and for me it’s far better than being flat.  Good luck with whatever you decide. Love Mo xx