Huge cheer for you Doz!!! Well flutterbys we have something to celebrate with Doz’s news I am so happy for her.
My goodness (polite as ever!)isn’t our ‘exclusive’ club growing? I think we are bloody amazing even on a bad day! I am a victim of the Zopiclone and am going to try to come off them but doc wants me to wait till after Christmas says he will help with that but hell don’t I sleep and nope don’t feel dopey (no comments) during the day, I know it’s addictive but it got me through those sad nights of haunting my own house!!!
sinead I can really understand your saying about the after effects and no you are not moaning just venting in a very safe place, I have had the same but not thyroid problems. I can agree with the taste thing I finished chemo on New Years Eve, then had two ops then in June had rads. I am now on Herceptin and Arimidex so damned if I know which of these things is still causing my problems,I still have days where I get up so exhausted that I usually say someone put sand in my body whilst I was sleeping! On the omeprazole too have had awful tummy problems but hey ho!!! Still when you think about it we have done quite well despite the s–t we have gone through! I am slowly getting my sense of the ridiculous back and my humour has become somewhat ‘black’ due to the things we have gone through and done I think!
ami you tell your hubby be afraid we may be flutterbys but we BITE! scarecrow indeed!!!
Hey Sue much respect lovely no I think you are amazing!!! and yes I am a teeny bit jealous as I have never been able to swim!!! Well my wonderful flutterbys off now been a long day ??? Food shopping arrgghh!!! gonna do it online from here on in it is crazy out there!!! Big Hugs to all Em xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
FANTASTIC NEWS DOZ so pleased for you you may find you sleep tonight.I go to bed shattered then snap awake and it usually takes ages to get to sleep then other nights I fall asleep quickly I am beginning to think its an age thing as well with me anyway.I have been going to exercise class at the gym twice a week and do find it helps and the people there are fantastic as all have their own problems.Ia am going to miss it as won’t be able to go for next 6 weeks so will just have to get out walking as soon as I feel okay after my op.Don’t know if I would have upset stomach with Letrozole as take Lansoprazole for hiatus hernia so perhaps that is helping. Doz this is a fantastic club you started and its great to be able to voice things you probably wouldn’t talk about to anyone else but us flutterbys are supporting each other even though we have never met I feel as if you are all true friends so hats of to you all HUGS all round jmr xxxxx
Agree with you Emmy about the black sense of humour but I have to be careful as I think sometimes people just don’t get it ha ha xx
Best thing that was said to me was if they have’nt got it they don’t get it! So yes lots of funny looks when i take the micky out of myself almost like i have lost the plot (yes!) But it gets me through so sod them ! Em hugs xxx
Doz & Emmy. You’ve just made my o.h. laugh with your threats. Don’t be too hard on the him - no matter what I look like he still seems to love me anyway. Just trying to make light of me despairing of my hair. Says I worry too much. Am I vain or do I just have standards? He must love me, me thinks. He surprised me a lovely ring for all I’ve been through, then today some fab earings!! Hope you’re not feeling desperately down, Doz, about Daniel. I didn’t realise he’d gone, I’ve been thinking about you but I thought it was on the 28th, so sorry.
Sinaed - I’m really sorry to hear you’re still having side effects, it really wears you down doesn’t it? Feels like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. I’m sure if anyone on here can help they’ll do so. I must say I haven’t had the same side effects as you but you must feel very low, especially when you had hoped to be picking up a bit. Your thyroid can be a fine balance and can make you feel unwell in all sorts or areas until they get the thyroxin dose right. I know because my mum had this problem all her adult life and had to take it permanently after a thyroid gland operation. Anyhow, we’re always here for you to come and have a chat and even though our problems might all be different to yours, we still listen and try to understand so don’t hang back, come and talk to us.
Sending a big hug, Ami xx
Ha Ha Ha you fabulous flutterbys…
I soo look forward to your comments I must look a right pudding sat here… in pj’s today Grinning my head off,
Ami
Daniels date was changed that much neither of us knew when he was actually going till last week so nothing to be forgiven for hon xxxx
And yes i,m sure O/H loves you to bits and is supportive and why not… not all O/H have pretty flutterbys in their lives apart from the ones on here… A VERY EXCLUSIVE CLUB INDEED 
Jmr
Thanks for the kind words hon, I know how you must have felt now when you got your results its such a weight off our shoulders Euphoric!!! BUT I still didnt get a good nights sleep I was absolutely drained so went to bed at 10… early for me, woke at one (the loo was calling me again) then fell asleep quite quickly I try not to open my eyes too much… but usually end up banging into a door frame on the way!!! then at 3.20 woke up again and was awake for ages… didnt wake up again till 9 so a bit of a wierd night…
I do think i,ll get better its just everything thats been going on recently, and my trip will help me get some normalicy back… If I dont get chance to post again before you go in my love to you and i,ll be just one of these flutterbys sending a massive hug letting you know were right there for you and standing by for the post to tell us your fine… and you will be sweetheart xxxxx
Em…you are amazing hon a nutter maybe but priceless, you make me laugh when I dont want too you make me cry when I hear what you have to go thro and your sense of humour is second to none my lovely and are,nt we all getting there from when we first started this bless ya…xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sinaed
I hope and prey you are feeling a bit better after reading all these posts keep posting honey we might not be able to take the grot away but i,m sure it,ll help you just knowing there are some crazy flutterbys who will always be there for you xxxxxxxxx
A VERY EXCLUSIVE FLUTTERBY SELF APPRECIATION GETTING IT BACK TOGETHER CLUB!!! AND WHY NOT… LOOK HOW FAR WE ARE HAVE COME!!
even the bad times dont seem too bad anymore and I know we all still have them so i,ll never ignore that but having you all around has been a life changing thing for me to be able to voice things that ordinarilly would have been bottled up and stored… a bit like an old wine…
So here we go again cos i,m waffling now
To all you flutterbys I,m back on monday and I will miss you all but dont think your getting let off that easy I,ll be back ha ha!!!
Love and hugs as alwayz have a fandabidosus weekend and love to each and everyone of you your all VERY special
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Hi all, ami I know what you mean about hubby, mine is exactly the same I would have been so lost without him! Who knew he was such an amazing cook? it was only through having this bliddy cancer that I found that out, my fault it was always my domain the kitchen so serves me right but he does such a mean gluten free pasta dish that it is no wonder I have put on weight!
jmr we are all here and yes sending hugs, I told Doz that we were all together with her in spirit holding her hand and the same goes for you.
sinead, I do so hope you are feeling a little better to know that it isn’t you and these blasted S/E are a total pain in the rear it puts me all about some days hence the Where did I go? When Doz first posted it was like that was me writing it and some of our lovely flutterbys could write each others post at times we all have so much in common regardless of what treatment we have had!
I so hope Doz is letting her hair down and having a few glasses of wine!
Sue how are you doing? I hope you are well? I was re reading some of the posts and so agree with the free membership of gyms etc I am trying more walking now but hell girl I do still get so breathless!!! I think sometimes it depends if it’s a ‘tired day’ or not!
Well flutterbys have a peaceful weekend doing whatever makes you happy Em xxxxxxxx
well flutterbys going to have a couple of glasses of wine tonight as will have to be early to bed tomorrow have to be at the hospital at 7.30 a.m which is early for me. But seeing as it takes ages to get to sleep may just as well have a late night. Thanks to you all for being there for me and I will post as soon as I can maybe Wednesday night if I feel okay.Hope Doz is having a fab weekend and hope the rest of you girls have a nice one too love and big hugs to you all and hope sinead your s/e lessen in time mine are not as bad as they were so hang in there will post soon xxxxxjmrxxx
Hi jmr
Hope you read this before you go into hospital!
Enjoy your relaxation & wine tonight. I’m thinking of you for Monday, flutterby. Hope tomorrow flies (parden the pun) and you’re in and out in the flap of a wing. Don’t worry about posting Wed. night, just coddle yourself. And when you’re stressed in hospital, just think of us all on this site, 'cos our positive healing thoughts are with you, sent out there - wherever you are - to download into a ‘make me well’ head file!!
Big Hugs, speak to you very soon, Ami xx
Hi Emmy
We are at a loss without Doz are we not?? Really hope she is enjoying her break without thinking BC!! Yes, as yourself, the kitchen is my domain, not that I wanted to take over, just that my hubby showed no interest in cooking apart from stirring pots on the stove! I really like the kitchen & cooking!! His speciality is corned beef hash which he made in abundance every time I went for chemo! Don’t know why I shorten it to chemo, I don’t think I was on such intimate terms to call it that!! He must have felt so lost in all of this, especially since my mum died a couple of weeks before I had a mastectomy and so I was wrapped up in everything! And still he was there for me.
How scary! I too lost my mum 8 months before DX as did Doz,who lost both parents at the same time. I am beginning to believe we are all long lost relatives! I feel lucky to have found such amazing people to share with.Well off I go so tired spent the afternoon shopping and as ever spent too much! Take care ami xxx
I’M BACK xxxxhugsxxx
Had a brilliant weekend 11 of us went we took a bottle of Champagne each and over the course of 3 days drank the lot!!! Well I had a reason to celebrate HIC!!!
I shared a room with 2 others and they eventually gave us the top suite in the hotel as we complained that the first room was too small for 3 so we ended up with this huge room with 3 beds in it…(happy not to share a bed with these hot flushes ha ha!!!)the view was amazing and needless to say our room was the meeting point for champagne and nibbles each nite before letting loose on Edinburgh
Had a trip to Glasgow on Sunday… my bloody feet were killing me I forgot how much they all like shopping!!!
I did ok tho and knee held up thank goodness!
Managed to get a quick call in to Daniel in Dubai he arrived safe and sound so first part of his ??Adventure went well, he goes to Helmund Province early next week, as this week he is with the Military training for safety and security issues!! Gulp! From there i,m not sure where life will take him as yet or which camp he will be working in to start off so i,m hoping he will Skype soon!!!
I treat myself to some new perfume (Agent Provocative) and was assured by one of the girls in our party it was a favourite with the men!!! So I went to the counter to pay for it after liberally spraying the tester… do you know the guy behind the counter served everyone but me!!! It was then the standing joke of the weekend… Buggers!
Went to some super restaurants (silly prices) but hey ho we only live once! The best was Angels and Bagpipes were I tried Venison and haggis, soooo scrumptious if I didnt think about what I was eating!
But the portions were minute… bring back good old fashioned portions!!
Got home last night and slept for England as we didnt get much sleep there… its always the same when women get talking into the wee hours and before you know it its breakfast time and I was,nt going to miss my good old english breakfasts so we were up at 7.30 each day.
All in all an absolute tonic
I did think about you all and especially JMR bless her hope all is going well for her xxx and yes Em a BC free weekend for once thank god! Tho on getting home there was the letter for my app, for Living with and Beyond BC so back down to earth once more!
Told you i,d be back with avengance ha ha!!!
I,m still in my beloved PJ’s and intend to chill for the day but had to post as i,ve missed you all and was so nosey to see what you’d all been getting up to without me
Love to all you beautiful flutterbys hoping your all continuing to get that damned chrysalis off a bit more each day
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Hiya Doz! Glad you had a good time, sounds like you need a rest now! Well bless my new dentist (old one retired!) Saved the tooth and told me back tooth is cracked so he has filled it though may need to have it removed at a later date! Eeek! He did however say it is common after chemo as it makes the mouth dry, told him its a shame they don’t tell you that to start with! Well done and dusted for xmas. Hope all you flutterbys are well. take care Em xxxxx
Doz
Sounds like you had an absolutely great time! All girls together. It’ll have done you the world of good. All that shopping eating and drinking - what more can a girl want? Glad you managed to speak to Daniel and he’s OK and put you in the picture, that will have put your mind at rest.
Emmy
I never knew chemo affected teeth. I knew radiotherapy does if its in that area. Makes you wonder what else it all does that we don’t realise!! Hope you shopped 'til you dropped buying yourself something nice.
I’m off Thursday morning to see onc.!! Hope I don’t have to wait too long!
Hugs to all, Ami xx
HIYA FLUTTERBYS xxxxx
Em… i,m so pleased to hear you got your teeth sorted out… hope they behave themselves now… cant be having falsies yet eh!! Mine has settled really well and has,nt caused me any problems at all so hope yours stays the same… I know the tablets i,m on can cause mouth problems and tho I didnt have chemo it does seem a s/e from all that we go through!!! The gift that keeps on bloody giving… AAAARGH!!!
Ami… I was so sad to read you lost your Mum too and can so empathize with you as Em said it seems a real coincidence that this all happens so close to a terrible loss and apart from feeling so raw over that this then comes along to test us even further I often wonder how the head and the heart copes but it does hon, although i,d turn the clock back to still have Mum and Dad here for a while longer (but not to go through all this again) never really did get over it I just accept it and try to carry on… not easy!
I hope your appointment goes well for tomorrow honey dont you just get sick of it all 
I was on such a high after my results last week but seem to have come down to earth with a massive bang cos now I,m thinking another blasted yr to wait to see if i,m still ok… Does it ever go away??
I so enjoyed my weekend away and it could,nt have come at a better time for me but now its over I feel quite flat and a bit despondant… could be cos i,m back at work on monday and didnt get any words of sympathy from our Sister… just gave me my shifts and said see you next week and would I still be able to do a double shift on xmas eve as she cant get anyone to cover it oh well it,ll take my mind of all the last few weeks events SIGH!!!
JMR THINKING OF YOU HONEY XXXXXHUGSXXXX
On a happier note… if I can drag myself out the doldrums!!! Daniel Skyped me today woo hoo!!! I just filled up and could,nt speak He,s really enjoying his time in Dubai and has had lots of free time to sight see and has sent me pics of the area where he is staying its just something else girls… its certainly not a country in poverty!!! Oh and could I top his phone up!!! Somethings never change!!!
Well my loverly flutterbys I think I,m going to put the old PJ’s on and watch a film tonight… had physio today and knee feels a bit sore, I think I did too much walking at the weekend but its getting there at last.
Love and hugs all round hope you are all not getting too stressed out with the xmas build up… at least we should be a bit more enthusiastic this year… ha ha!!! says she with a face like a well slapped arse!!!
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Hi everyone
Ta Dah!!!
Haven’t got to go back to the hospital for 6 months! Wish I’d never mentioned about waiting in the last post as I had to wait 2 hrs before seeing onc.! When I got back my O.H had a meal cooked for me so that was lovely.
Doz - I remember reading about you and Emmy losing parents in reply to my post & feeling so sorry. Losing both yours, was literally a double blow. I was dx same time as mum, different cancer, and put off my operatation until after her funeral. She never knew about me. It all seems to come at the same time flutterby, that year I lost a sister-in-law along with friends & nearly lost my dad. It makes you wonder how we’ve all coped on here. As you say you don’t really get over it, just learn to live with it, live differently, knowing your parents are still there deep in your heart. Well, you’re back to work!! Makes you wonder if the Sister is on the same planet - you must think, “Did she miss something - does she know I’ve been ill??” Very compassionate for a nurse!! Ah well, don’t go overdoing it - you come first right now. Skype’s wonderful for seeing those a long distance, bet you felt really near to Daniel. Dubai looks very luxurious and clean. Hope you’ve topped that phone up!!
Emmy -
Have you wrapped all those Chrissie presents up yet? And are the teeth OK? Hope it’s not going to be, “All I want for Christmas……etc” It’s horrid isn’t it when you lose a parent. Is your dad still around? Mine lives from day to day. He misses my mum terribly and only has me. Talk about us believing we 3 are long lost relatives, it would be odd if we knew one another from the same hospital!!
Jmr
If you’re reading on here yet, hope you are not too sore, Hope to hear how you are picking up soon. Look after yourself flutterby.
Hugs to all, Ami xx
Hi Ami
Was just going to log off I thought all you flutterbys had finally hibernated though we had another in the house this morning?? really strange for this time of the year!!
I’M SO PLEASED FOR YOU… thats such good news and probably worth the wait in the long run :)though 2 hrs is pushing it a bit poor you.
Yes you do live differently after going through the type of loss we have all been through… Christmas has always been hard as they died mid/late December and because it was so close to Christmas we had to wait till January to have the burial, it was a very hard time for me, Christmas has always been a bit empty since as they were a big part of our festivities they stayed over with us for a few days… though now i,m divorced at least i,m in a different house so the memories are,nt so painful.
As for work I really think a Nurses sympathys are saved for patients only… tho not in my case I hope!!! It was par for course after some comments that have been voiced when others have been on sick so I expected nothing less… A different planet is a brilliant description ha ha ha!!! tho honestly I would,nt want her job in these times it must be pretty stressful!
I did top his phone up only to get a text today asking for more!!! till he gets paid, He has someone looking to buy his apartment tomorrow so was on the phone obviously for quite a while to the friend who is renting it from him… thats quite sad really as its been on the market 4 months and no.one has been then one week after he goes he gets a viewing so i,m feeling quite sorry for his friend if it does sell quick
Well i,m sure your feeling happy tonight knowing you dont have to go back for 6 months woohoo!!! Brilliant another step forward flutterby well done!
Love and ((HUGS)) to all you flutterbys hope your all well…
And Sinaed I hope your feeling better hon hav,nt seen a post from you for a while so I hope thats good… if you know what I mean xx
And JMR we are missing a flutterby hope you are flapping those wings to a good recovery xxx
Em xxhugxx
Take care girlies love Doz xxxxxhugsxxxx
Hi all you lovely flutterbys eventually escaped from hospital last night . Typical nurse couldn’t wee after they took catheter out so was put back in for 36 hours so delayed me getting home.was glad to get some sleep last night.feeling fine but know have to rest and relax for a while ha ha I am bored already.Not allowed to do anything apart from make a cuppa.Glad you had a fabulous weekend Doz and your knee held out also must have been nice to skype Daniel.thanks for your kind thoughts again.glad you haven’t got to go back for 6 months Ami. Emmy glad you got your teeth sorted everyone seems to be doing not to badly.Doz you have to be positive and try not to think of what will happen in the future just live for the day I am not thinking about next year just happy for results this year as they have made me feel more positive and I refuse to go back to the way I was.You of course have had a lot more to deal with what with Daniel going away but please try to think positive thoughts and then things may not seem so bad. Love and Hugs to all you flutterbys xxxxxxx
p.s got my P.Js on for the next week at least sooooo cosy xx
HI JMR
So good to have you back xxxxxxxxxxxx
And good to hear that your in your PJ’S ha ha go for it girl and enjoy them
You are right about thinking positive about everything I got sooo low and I dont know why with having such a good appointment??
But hey ho a year on in this damned long trawl and time to pick myself up again
Take care honey wrap yourself in cotton wool and chill flutterby Really glad to have you back xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxhugsxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thanks Doz I am lucky to have OH who is looking after me and spoiling me. Continue to think positive and all will be okay it has helped me.
I have also got a snuggle blanket so I am all cosied up on the sofa as its really cold outside xxxxhugsxxx