So, I had my mastectomy 3 weeks ago now and I’m desperately trying to find younger women (I’m 32) who live in my area or a group who I can meet up with for a coffee/chat, or people who fancy going for a walk or know of any good post op exercise classes or even fancy a glass of wine! Anything really, it’d just be lovely to meet people who have been through or are going through this that aren’t 60 plus!
I want to talk about guys, work, family, living situations, sex - all the stuff that runs through your head as a younger woman recovering with breast cancer.
I’ve searched online loads, been to numerous websites etc but all I can find is groups that seem to have lots of older ladies in it, or that operates miles away.
I live in Balham, so if anyone is in the area or not too far away please get in touch, maybe we could start our own group?
ZomersetGirl
x
Dear Zomerset girl
Welcome to the BCC forum. I hope you are soon able to meet up with others in a similar situation.
Very best wishes
Janet
BCC Moderator
Hi ZomersetGirl
I have sent you a message, I would be interested in meeting up with you and others of a similar age and I live nearby.
Lacuna.
Hi hun.
Im directionally challenged so i couldn’t say if im near. i live in leicestershire. turned 30 in may. had wle and snb in Feb. just finished chemotherapy and booked in for a double mastectomy in august. would love to meet up though x x
I’m 29 and live in Sussex so Balham is only about 45 minutes away so would be happy to meet up.
I’m not sure if you’d be interested in coming to Crawley but there’s a young women’s support group and we meet once a month. They offer fab treatments like massages, reiki, etc for a small donation cost which you can have at any time - I’m not sure if I’m allowed to post links but have a google of the Olve Tree Cancer Support Crawley and it should come up
xx
Wish I lived nearer, there arE no younger women in my are either. I am in Cambridgeshire.
X
I;m in London and would love to meet and chat about all things 30 something!
Me too gadget gal, I would be happy to come to London 
Did you go to the younger woman meet in London?
Rae
X
I haven’t been to any of the forums, i might do, if there’s another one In the South East. If you have any free dates to propose please let me know. My surgery will be underway soon but I am hoping for dates in the next few days.
Hiya, I’m I the South East and I’m going to the Younger Women’s forum in Brighton. It’s at the end of November x
Goes to show how well I read! I’ll put that date inmy diary
Hi GG,
More info here…
http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/breast-cancer-services/talks-courses-local-support/younger-womens-forums
Happy to chat to anyone on here, on PM or in person,
Jelly x
Just because someone is 60+ doesn’t mean they don’t have the same needs!
totally confused i actually disagree… being plunged into the menopause in your 30s is something we expect 20 years later, so 60+ers would have been there done that in their 50s normally. loss of fertility when you have no kids or were planning more is not something your average 60+ woman would have to consider. women in their 60s are much less likely to be single and seeking a partner (although yes some will be in that situation), but also dealing with BC in your 30s means your having to live with bc for 30 years longer than the 60+ ladies with BC.
yes there are some issues which are the same for everybody no matter what age as its circumstances like being a mum to teenagers… i was in my 30s but others with teens might be in their 50s or 60s so yes some issues are the same and are more situational but some issues will just not be an issue for your average 60 yr old.
not intended to offend just that i totally understand the need for support for younger women.
zomersetgirl i was gonna suggest the younger womens forums as i have been to the glasgow one and it was great just a pity they are just one off things as im sure many younger women would benefit from continued support… also check if you have a maggies centre near you as i go to a monthly younger womens group at maggies and it s been fab.
I also disagree that the needs for younger women are completely the same as for 60+. Certainly the financial side of things. Most 60+ women are either retired or nearly retired. I’m at a key stage of my career and facing the fact that I’ve had to go from earning £300+ a day to earning zilch, as well as being out of the loop in what is a very large part of my life is more huge than the physical scars I am facing. Although at 40 and one miscarriage down I’d decided kids aren’t for me, having my fertility, and the option of those last couple of years when some change their mind about trying for children taken away is also fairly significant.
I live in north London so would be up for a London group / meetup.
Well I am 53 - have 3 teenagers - happy to talk to younger people as well, and I have not hit the menopause! So as you see not all women in there 50’s have gone through it already! I have just started treatment and I and others should be open to the same facilities as other ages… Lucky you earning £300 a day, some of us don’t earn that in a month! People should really be careful how they address the forums on here, we should be sharing the good stories, not frightening people as I was when I was up until gone 2am when I first found out - I was looking for help and guidance and I left with more than a handful of horry stories - I have been told to keep away!
Hi ladies
Sorry can’t resist putting in my tuppence worth.
I am 65 and the needs and aspirations I have now are completely different to those I had in my 30s/40s. Had I been diagnosed in my 30s I would have been absolutely devastated. My own daughter is 30 and it would break my heart if she was diagnosed at this young age. Possibly gone would be the chance of having children, a partner and she would always be looking over her shoulder in case there is a recurrence. My own mother was in her 30s when she was diagnosed and had a mastectomy so I know something of which I speak - I don’t remember my mother any other way than with one breast, but as I got older and understood she told me that living with the constant worry about recurrence was a nightmare mainly because of worry about her kids.
I want to live to see grandchildren and even see them grow up but know that my own daughter is an adult now and can take care of herself. When you have young children they are usually your first priority and if you’re sick who will look after them. If you don’t have chilldren then as I say there is a slight possibility that the chance might be gone.
Younger women need to know that there are others out there who can help not only with the emotions but with the practicalities of living with bc.
Sorry about the soapbox.
Maggie
I am only 29 and was diagnosed aged 28. Everything Madjock/Maggie & Lulu say above is true. I don’t have children yet and as I’m getting married next year, the next step on my life gameplan was children. I know can’t have them for at least 5 years after I finish chemo because of the temoxifen and as my periods seem to have stopped at the moment who actually knows if I can have them full stop.
I think the younger women’s forum is going to be very beneficial for me as having no cases of bc in the family being diagnosed was something I’d never even thought about. I have so much to learn. Whilst I completely understand the need for forums and meetings for everyone I just don’t think that 50/60 year old women have the same needs as 20/30/40 somethings. I for one think there should be forums/meetings for every age group and then the meetings could be tailored to the needs of everyone in each group.
Jelly
x
I have just been told they are planning a day forum for younger women in March next year which would be good to go to…any one up for coming to that?
Just to add re: 30 something’s. I was diagnosed feb this year at 36. i dont have children (we were trying when i got diagnosed). I was actually put through IVF before my chemo so i now have 7 embryos frozen at a later date.
Fertility is actually my main worry… so i agree with a lot of the posts above…i honestly think our needs are different. I feel very isolated at times not having people my age in my area to talk to. The internet has been a god send
Rae
x