Hi!
I have really struggled with my diagnosis in March and although tried to stay positive through my 2 ops and now radiotherapy I am still having really dark thoughts on a daily basis!
I have tried complimentary therapies and have asked for counselling but that may have to wait because she is on long term sick from hospital!
I can’t ever see me enjoying life with these horrible thoughts! I am trying to be brave with family and friends but inside I am so sad! xx
Hi Sandra,
Sorry to hear you’re feeling like this, but you’re not alone. It’s still early days & it takes a while to get over the shock of it all & adjust afterwards.
Is there a ‘moving forward’ course in your area? I haven’t done one, but those who have reported on here have found it very valuable. Also, there is the helpline above if you feel you need to talk things through.
Hopefully, you’ll be able to access counselling before long.
Try not to be too hard on yourself, I think we all think we should be getting back to ‘normal’ far quicker than it takes in reality. It will pass.
ann x
Thankyou Ann!
I just seem to focus on the negatives and can’t get to change my mindset! Hopefully when I go back to work I will improve! I am alone quite a lot of the time and overthink! xx
Hi Sandra
It’s nice to hear that you’ve completed your active treatment.
It takes time to heal both physically and mentally. After all, this totally consumes us, while going through treatment. It took me almost a year to get through all the treatment, so no wonder its difficult to think about anything else afterwards. I’m now 6 months on, and I can almost get through a morning/afternoon without thinking about it.
Its still early days for you, but you will gradually start to enjoy life again.
Sue xx
Thankyou Sue!
It’s nice to know there could be light at the end of the tunnel! I have so much living still to do’ xx
Hi Sandra , just wanted to say I’m 2 and half years on from diagnosis now and although I will never forget what I’ve been though it isn’t in my thoughts constantly and I’m able to think of it as something that happened in the past and lock it away now, of course in the early months I was like you and it invaded my every waking moment but you do begin to move forward and naturally you will get back in to normal life and it won’t be the first thing you think of when you open your eyes anymore, life will become fun again I promise! Xx
Sandra
Do you work? If so do you haave an occupational health department? The only reason I am asking is that if you do, you could get your manager to refer you to them for some counselling.
I know what you mean I had some counselling as I was feeling that I was doing too well and was going to crash so my boss referred me and it really really helped. I think this is a feeling that we can all relate to, I would say 99% of the time I am absolutley fine but then it catches me out and the anxiety hits in, especially as I did not find a lump it was found through a routine mammo.
Sending you a hug xxxx
Hi Sandra
Try your local cancer support group for counselling. Not sure where you live but you could google it or speak to your bcn who’ll point you in the right direction.
Just know that these thoughts are normal but you’ve come through treatment now so time to go live your life. A counsellor will help you figure out coping mechasms for these thoughts.
Jo xx
Thankyou Jobey, Helena and atomicjojo!
I am a teaching assistant so I may see if the school could offer me some counselling! I do value your support and do look forward to a more normal life! xx
Hi
I finished active treatment in April this year and have found it really difficult at times, the Moving forward course is a good place to start it was lovely to be with other ladies who knew where I was coming from, lots of good information and help, my local hospital (worthing) have one in November, you should be able to find out through this site.
My Oncologist has taken me off my hormone medication until the end of August due to SE’s and I have been referred for counselling due to my anxiety levels, I am keeping fit with swimming, walking and a fitness class but it feels as if everything I do is a way of helping to prevent it coming back and keep me busy rather than because I enjoy it, my BCN nurse said counselling will help return the joy and balance to my life.
I will never forget but like you Sandra I have tried to stay positive through almost a year of treatment but I so look forward to the time when it doesn’t invade my life every day and make me sad.
I miss the person I was before BC but with time and support hopefully we can rebuild a new “normal”.
Hugs and Best Wishes
Mary x
I don’t think you can underestimate the mental or physical impact this experience has on you .While you are in active treatment you are focussed on that and recovering from each stage of the process once treatment has finished that’s when it really hits you what you have been through and you can really struggle .I think most of us have needed help in some way with our recovery whether it’s counselling ,anti depressants ,complimentary therapies ,support groups .Hope you feel better soon .Jill.
Mary and Jill Thankyou!
I think I will have to have counselling or find a moving forward session I am in East Sussex so not sure what’s available to me!
My BCN hasn’t been that helpful so will have to wait until my oncology appt in September to discuss how I’m feeling! xx
Sandra may be worth looking at what your local cancer charities offer ,our local centre has counselling and complimentary therapies for very small charge or free ,why wait til September if you are feeling rubbish ?Or go via GP .
Hi Jill!
I would go to my surgery but I get to see a locum every time! I need a sympathetic doctor but the books are closed in most of the surgeries!
If things do get so bad i will pay for counselling it’s a shame I can’t access the hospital one!
I have had a couple of complimentary therapies but they are done at the hospice which is beautiful but seeing patients makes me upset! xx
Yes I can understand that ,I felt the same ,most of the services are based in the same place as the hospice ,which is not a place you really want to be close to right now is it! It really does make a difference when you find a GP you feel comfortable really being honest about how crap you feel .I had lovely GP for 25 years retired last year ,new GP nice but a lot harder to “spill the beans” .
Hi Sandra,
Hope it helps but just did a quick check online and there is a Moving Forward course in Brighton starting on the 21st September, you can register for it through this website with Breast Cancer Care, good luck
Mary x
Thankyou Mary! I will look into the moving forward course! I so want to move on with a smile! x
Jill! I will try and change my GP just need someone who will understand me! x
It really does make a difference, there is a lovely lady GP in my practice but she only works part-time and it’s hard to get an appt with her.My GP is nice but I find it hard to talk to him about anything other than straight forward ,simple to fix physical problems.
I too am finding it hard to move on after my lumpectomy followed by chemo and radiotherapy. My treatment finished last August… I went to the go about my anxiety and he prescribed me some medication and referred me to a therapist… She has been really helpful giving me strategies to help me deal with my worries… This week I seem to have a bit of a blip… Reading the comments on here is so reassuring that it’s not just me that feels this way… I do believe that eventually things will easier and we just must take one day at a time…xx
Thanks Sas,it really does help to know other people struggle too.Did the medication help ,what was it ?Im thinking of asking for anti depressants for anxiety .