Hi Mounties
sorry you’re having that response. suggest reminding them that you are covered by the disabilities act now and that you shouldn’t be treated less favourably than anyone else. try citizens advice for more advice as they have a lot of information on employment law, additionally you could try ACAS. Both have have websites and I think ACAS have something on bullying in the workplace.
take care
Sue
What is it with the workplace? I went back to work 4 mths after mastectomy and immediate reconstruction. My deputy accused me of undermining ‘her’ authority within weeks of returning. I might add that she has a ‘close’ working relationship with the boss!
There followed months of intimidation. My boss of 9 years retired whilst I was off sick so I came back to a new one who, I believe, was promoted above his capabilities. In his previous post we had worked together very well but it turned out that he was supporting my deputy in order to keep in favour with the boss. They restructured the line management within the unit. I lost more than half of my staff who went to my deputy who got given the same title as me and the same salary. Needless to say I raised a grievance. Following the hearing I went to appeal and was given numerous promises by my boss’s boss. 6 months down the line, no promises had been kept and I was being further ostracized. Ended up in hospital with high blood pressure, atrial flutter and numerous other problems including thyroid poisoning. Up shot was that they offered me redundancy whilst I was off sick. Fought for 6 months to get a decent package and finally gave in and ‘retired’ at the end of July. I am aged 56 and had anticipated working til at least 60. I know the DDA is there to protect us but what protection do we have from women/colleagues who can manipulate others to their own ends? We are very vulnerable when we return to work. We think we are up to it but I don’t think we are. We are trying to be positive and to pick up where we left off but others are just using our vulnerability to their own ends. Perhaps Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour ought to research how many of us have had our careers ruined – not by breast cancer but by our supposed colleagues! I had to sign a compromise agreement stating that I would not discuss my ‘exit package’ so may be limited in what I can say but I’m getting really angry that so many of us appear to be suffering more from work place problems than breast cancer itself!!
Hi Rareybird
Went to hospital on Monday had examination of both breasts, still slightly sore from surgery,however
good news everything seems to be fine at the moment, mamogram in February and see Oncologist in 12 months time, see surgeon February. No medication needed as it was triple negative whatever that means.
Still dont feel that elated, as you say people stop giving their support once treatment has finished, however I do have a very good husband who is an ex-nurse so I manage okay.
look forward to hearing from you soon.
Luv ette
Hi Sarah,
Hospital went okay, no medication, mamogram February and oncologist in 12 months time. Good news
but dont feel elated. I think when something like this comes along it takes time. I have a very good husband who is also an ex-nurse and manage to cope with his help.
Luv
Ette
Hello everyone,
After my last post, I phoned my BCN and even though it was after 5pm, he picked up the phone to me. We talked a few things through and he is going to ring me back this week. He really is the best BCN you can have. On the phone, the tears flowed for a bit, so it is starting at last! I didn’t sleep last night and have done nothing but eat cr*p and drink wine (in response to the latest report that its my fault that I have BC). I had the music on loud this morning and cleaned the house. Will tackle the ironing next. Feel very tearful now, don’t know why, just feel very down at the moment.
Kat x
Hi Sandra and mounties! Sorry to hear the dreadful work stories - it’s the last thing anyone with BC needs to have to struggle with employment on top of everything else.
Ette, glad to hear that you’re OK and that you don’t have to go back for 12 months - wow, what an achievement! Can understand it feeling a bit of an anticlimax tho. I see my onc in 2 weeks time possibly for the last appointment for 6 months. For me, the end of treatment has been much worse emotionally than actually going through treatment - i was so focused on going to all those appointments, i didn’t have much time to think. keep talking about how you feel.
Oh Kat, what a shame, I was hoping you had pumped so many endorphins in your system that it was going to see you through. Your BCN sounds fantastic - mine are like that too, nothing phases them. I know you’re trying to keep busy, but do consider letting yourself have a good old fashioned bawl.
Hope to chat with you all online tonight
Sarah
XXX
Hi Everyone,
How did the online chat go? I went running last night and was a bit of an emotional wreck when I got back so didn’t go online.
I am still crying every now and then- I suppose it is pent up anger, frustration etc since June and ‘the first chance’ I’ve had to be on my own for a few hours and let it all out without upsetting husband and my boys. I feel so low and have no-one to talk to as the novelty of me and my diagnosis has worn off and because ‘I coped so well’ people can’t handle this new, crying me.
Kat x
Hi Kat
It sounds like you’re feeling pretty down at the moment. If you feel it would help to talk to someone in confidence about how you are feeling please use the breast cancer care help line on 0808 800 6000. Here you can talk to someone in confidence about your fears and concerns. The team on the helpline will be only too happy to talk to you and just be a listening ear. BCC are here to support you so please use us if it will help. The line is open Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm and Saturdays 9am to 2pm.
Kind regards
Katie
Moderator
Breast Cancer Care
Hi Kat
I was diagnosed in May Op was in June and on FEC number 5 next friday.
I am not a weepy person, I am a pull yourself up by your boot straps and get on with it. …Until now… I just go off on a crying jag at a moments notice. I don’t have to be feeling sad or thinking about anything, I just start and tears pour down my face. been doing it for weeks. OH gives me a hug and I stop after a while and feel fine again. I think this is normal…don’t tell me if its not!!!
K