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Hi Heather,sorry you are having a difficult time.I think alot of us struggle to ask for help,no-one likes feeling vulenrable or needy.Would it be easier to ask friends in a text message or e mail rather than face to face?You can take your time composing it and explain that you find it difficult to ask.Good friends should understand and hopefully offer support.
Hi Heather …how awful that you are struggling and if like me with bone Mets …mobility is a huge problem. I am very lucky that I have hubby and family nearby but its really about being too proud isn’t it?
You have to try to drop a few hints to friends in a nice way …how about going out for a meal with them and bring it up.
I understand you want to work but maybe cut yr hours and claim pip to top you up with the shortfall.
I do feel for you as in seven months I have gone from swimming, shopping and generally being a Duracell bunny to walking with a stick and not being able to drive due to Mets in femur, hips and pelvis.
Chin up xccc
Hi heather you sound like me.i do have a husband who has learnt to do things.but have never asked anyone else except our children but dont even ask them for a lot…it is a dilemma because your prob normally independent…how about online shopping.and getting a cleaner in for two hours once a week.and for other needs like someone said text your friends question to help you…McMillan helpline gives good advice.and they can advise financial emotional needs…take care Sharon x
Hi Heather, asking for help is difficult! For me, it’s because I have had such a long battle, on and off for 21 years now. I feel that my friends are heartily sick of me!
I think friends really do want to help, they just don’t know how or when. If you can ask for a specific task, particularly if it is something quite simple then I’m sure that they will be very pleased to be asked.
How friends deal with our illness is a whole new discussion! My preferred approach is to carry on as usual, my close family and friends are so good at this that I was genuinely shocked when a trials nurse asked me about my palliative care referral!! Who, me? You must be joking!
We all need some help to share this burden, I hope that you can feel you deserve it xx
I agree, you need to be specific, and if you feel guilty, try to make the request accommodate their busy lives too, e.g. “when you next go to the supermarket, would you be able to get me…?”
This article might be useful: psychologytoday.com/blog/turning-straw-gold/201106/how-ask-help