When I first went to my onc dept for my pre assessment for chemo, we were told that we must not have unprotected sex as it would be dangerous for hubby. I was also told that there was a time period after chemo is finished were safe sex must be practised. My question or questions are, has anyone else been told this? And if so for how long after chemo has finished? Cos I can’t remember, thanks ladies xxx
Hi if I remember right I was told 5 days after each chemo was never told about when finished altogether but think diff units prob do dif things I cant really think most of us where up to sex on day 5 of chemo with se
hi, to be on the safe side I was told the same thing, 5 days after each session, then about the same once finished treatment altogether, how do people get on that are on weekly regime?
although I would have to agree sex is the last thing on your mind when the ses of the chemo kick in,
we dont all experience the ses though so I appreciate everyone is different, if in doubt phone up and find out either bcn, onc, will be able to let you know for definate,
x Liz x
Oh I was told no unprotected sex at all through chemo but I just can’t remember for how long after you have finished all your sessions x
This subject was never raised with me (not once!!). Perhaps they thought I was too old (49/50 during chemo). On top of that they have therefore never discussed the down side of Letrozole for me in relation to my sex life and had to come to that realisation myself. Fortunately felt able to broach the subject with my GP who came to my rescue…not literally, of course!!! The prescription he gave me was what did the trick!!
I think it is something which should be discussed to encourage us to maintain our normal life, wherever this is possible. To be honest, I had neither the inclination nor the energy. But I know that will not be the case for all. J.
Aww jaynek we never to old I agree most of them never tell us all the se of meds and when they do my onc favourite was no I’ve never heard of that before typical blue dragfly I think tbh if you leave it 2 /3 wks that’s plenty of time as our bloods wld be ok for next chemo then so I’m sure it wld be safe enough unless u call helpline I’m sure they know
Liz I expect the weekly plp are dif as it’s not as strong as 3 weekly but saying that I’m now back on chemo with sec and no one as mentioned sex and chemo so yes maybe I’m to old lol tc all
It makes me cross that its assumed that any woman won’t be thinking about sex during treatment. No matter what the age, do we not deserve a decent and fulfilling sex life?
I went one step further when I asked about sex and they said about using protection etc, I said what about, you know, other stuff… is it a bodily fluid thing… and the nurse looked at my OH embarrased. Now *come on* for goodness sakes, they are MEDICAL people and we’re all adults. We know that not everything revolves only about missionary position sex only! What I meant was oral sex, BOTH of us. But due to her obvious embarrasment I didn’t feel able to actually say this and my OH was a bit red faced too.
Now can’t they produce a booklet about this or something, so we know. What about all forms of sex?? Oral, vaginal, anal, whatever, there’s all sorts of people and things they do that will have cancer.
Seeing as I had oral thrush 5 out of 6 chemos, my poor OH didn’t get much action at all - suspect I owe him a few 
It is something to do with the chemicals being in bodily fluids for 5 days after a chemo - so unprotected sex could cause a reaction to a man. Plus obviously not wanting to get pregnant during chemo. So 2 issues really - and I guess the latter is why it is best to avoid for a while after finishing chemo completely.
But in theory sex with a condom is fine whenever (as long as the dammed thing doesn’t fall off!!)
My chemo nurse was quite open about this, and I actually laughed and said ‘well clearly not many people actually have sex on chemo’ and she smiled and said they do. And we did as well - emotional closeness is important after a BC diagnosis if it is what both partners want. Since I finished chemo and my cycles vanished I have not wanted sex at all, so totally the opposite way to what I expected.
I was never told about any of this (apart from the being careful part). How about a good old snog? Assume that’s OK!!
Hi all,
Just for information I have put for you below the link to the area of BCC’s website where sex and intimacy is discussed, which some of you may find helpful. The helpline are also available to discuss this type of concern with you if you wish.
Take care all,
Jo, Facilitator
I’m far too old for sex - 57… No I don’t believe myself either.
Me and the old man always leave it a week after poisoning before we do anything and no ill effects for him at all. We did try a condom but didn’t like it.
Possibly more difficult for you younger folk who want to be at it like rabbits??? Go for it - it cheers you up!
Linstar
IF your man comes near you before 5 days… he deserves to have his willy drop off!
Charlotte, you heartless thing!
I wasn’t told anything in particular, and indulged when both of us felt like it, without condoms too as we have birth control taken care of in other ways.
I am pleased to report his willy didn’t fall off.
Forgetting oral sex as well - would his mouth fall off? LOL.
TMI? Ok, tmi.
Kinda difficult for a mouth to fall off… maybe it might have sealed shut instead?
Actually, for some of you maybe that might not be such a bad thing to happen to OH!!
“I was told no unprotected sex at all through chemo”
So a couple who never need to use condoms (and have never used them) have to suddenly start buying them for 6 months?!
And seeing as all the poisons make the LG area very sore and sensitive, adding creased latex is going to be the biggest pain (literally) and the whole experience has got to be a passion-killer.
I’m so glad that no-one told me any of these precautions (no pun intended) and so we have carried on as normal.
Has anyone heard of or tried Replens?
Supposed to be a very good and non-hormone vaginal moisturiser.
I’m very dry post hysterectomy/menopause and had to give up HRT as well. Thought I might try the Replens.
Old codgers have to have a sex life!
Linstar
Anyway I’ve had a very sheltered life.
I always thought that oral sex was just talking about it.
Linstar, that’s exactly what it is, isn’t it?
There’s another thread (search for “and all that jazz”) on the same subject that contains assorted tips and suggestions for things like Replens. I can’t remember the names of some of the other products, but they’re mentioned on that thread.
Well we only used a condom once - decided it felt weird as we’ve not used condoms for 10 years. Total passion killer, it reminded me WHY we were using them which was a killer for me to be honest.
And I now do not like the feel of condoms at all, it didn’t bother me when I didn’t know any better. My OH is the only person I’ve been with that I’ve not used condoms with.
And I’ve been told that whilst I’m on Taxoxifen we must make sure I don’t get pregnant, so that means either condoms or the coil. I can’t use the coil, when I was first diagnosed I went and had a non-hormonal coil fitted, it did not agree with me, my body rejected it (as it seems to do with anything put in my bl**dy womb) and I ended up in A&E one night due to cramping akin to a miscarriage.
So now the only options are condoms or my partner having the snip. Now we don’t want him having the snip because we’re still holding out some hope when I’m 40 that we *may* be able to have a baby, which is really unlikely but dont want to rule it out forever yet.
We’re going to “risk it” - seeing as we were trying for 5 years and only got pregnant once and miscarried.
But on the whole oral sex thing - go ahead, knock yourself out - ahem. LOL.