That must be very difficult for you as you’ve lost peopld to BC 
thats good that its very small. I agree about the loss of control it’s very strange for me! I had my lumpectomy on 16th December and i was out working on 20th December (the joys of being self employed with a party business in our busiest party season of the year 
) but i was stricly overseeing (no lifting) as i hate to not be in control!! I’ve done a few hours of work over the past couple of days at a few parties and rested aswell inbetween, like you I’m not one to sit around. I think mentally it’s helped me to be back to normal but I am looking forward to a nice break at christmas for a few days.
We certainly will get through it! Merry Christmas to you too🥰