Hi. I am coming up to it being a year from first diagnosis. I have not got any date for appointment yet. I went to a race for life event to support and I ended up getting really emotional. I think it is because I am waiting for the mammogram and getting anxious about that. I can’t seem to move on and not see it as anything to worry about as people expect. I am a success story as recovered and cancer is all gone. I started tamoxifen but caused lots of side affects which haven’t gone away after stop taking it so I feel I haven’t fully recovered. I feel so embarrassed about getting so emotional. Not sure how to stop
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Hi laineyh, sorry to read how you are feeling. I have just had my second follow up and I was a nervous wreck. Its a reminder of what you have been through and then the fear of recurrance. I expect we all feel the same at the time of our follow ups.
I would look at the moving forward courses. I completed it about 6 months after treatment and found it beneficial.
Hope your check up goes well and you feel better soon x
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Hi @laineyh scanxiety is real and affects most of us, certainly in the first few years. You need some help to come to terms with what has happened and I echo what @poorlyboob has recommended, the Moving Forward course is really helpful. You can find out more about it here Moving Forward | Breast Cancer Now. I shall be having my third annual mammogram in a month but have convinced myself that this is a good thing as it will prove I’m still cancer free. Not easy to do though. Please don’t beat yourself up about the scanxiety, it’s a natural reaction but one that can be eased with help.
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Hi @laineyh. I had my 1st post op mammogram yesterday. Totally fine leading up to it ( apart from occasionally wondering when I’d hear, but was aware of backlogs so was a month & half over the year).
I’ve been more worried since. I think because it was a bit more painful in the breast that had cancer, but that could be as have some oedema still. She was quite brusk and just getting on with it (seems usual and yet also odd to do a profession where empathy is lacking, but ime mammographers are like this, maybe its the amount they do or they have to switch off as know they are going to cause pain every time?). She told me 4-6 weeks till I hear which is standard.
As I went she said “see you again” to which I replied " not for a year I hope" (met with silence that made me wonder).
I’m trying not to overthink and read into signs that may mean nothing, but am one for picking up on stuff. Logic part of my brain says that interpretation of mammograms won’t be her expertise and it takes 2 experts to read a mammogram. Plus mine was not spotted on mammogram and didn’t pick up the DCIS, so I know they have their limits.
By yesterday evening had almost convinced myself I’ll get a callback.
All, I can do is get on with life and park it for now, as nothing I can do about it.
I too ended up stopping tamoxifen due to side-effects, so that adds worry. But I was also Her2 +++, and yet not offered herceptin, which I think might of been a bad move on a 16 mm lump with poor margins of DCIS. Hard not to think of the negatives and wonder if undertreated.
Despite not having much treatment, I’m just finally feeling like I’ve got more energy lately, so its been a long time getting over radiotherapy I think. Managing better at work than prior and frequent nerve and joint pains in my legs seem better this week. Ive resolved to live in the moment and enjoy my days feeling fit and do as much as possible- as you never know what is around the corner.
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Hi
All your feelings and fears are normal
I hate to think what my blood pressure and heart rate are when i get my appointments
I’m 2 mammograms in post discharge and the anxiety is very real but thankfully all clear
Tell the radiology team about your fears, take someone with you and if it helps talk to a nurse on here beforehand
Keep checking and know that this is all about remaining well
Good luck x
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I was nervous as well about my first mammogram after finishing treatment, but I told myself that my 4 rounds of chemo and 25 radiation treatments along with first few herceptin infusions had done the job. It has been 6 years now and I have just had another clear mammogram! Yaay! 
I am also still taking letrozole 
.
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I’m due to book for my second annual mammogram and it’s not an easy time. I thought I’d found something odd in one of my boobs but the cancer physio said it was probably scar tissue and felt more pliable than it was last time I saw her in February. I’ve been waiting for my letter to arrive some time in June to book for July but no letter so far, the waiting is stressful in itself. I will chase on Friday if not heard anything. Last year I had to chase and I wasn’t on the list, even though the breast care nurse said I was on their list post surgery.
I did the Moving Forward course ( would highly recommend) last year before my mammogram and several other ladies wanted to get one done so they could have reassurance that they were clear and their treatment had worked. I felt the same and so relieved afterwards. The breast nurse called and gave me more information than was on the letter, which was it’s clear and see you in a year.
@Darla49 thanks for your post, it does make me feel less worried. I was ER+ and HER2+ and had chemotherapy, Herceptin, surgery and radiotherapy.
@entropy I’ll be keeping everything crossed for you 
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Thanks @naughty_boob. Though I respect that treatment is long and difficult usually for her2, I find being a rare case of getting declined treatment for it does cause its own fears. I suppose there would be lots of options of treatment available should I need it.
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Hi laineyh
As others have said your anxiety it absolutely normal. I had my first mammogram after treatment in December 2024 and was a nervous wreck, I had written myself off as was convinced it would be bad news…… I have to say the staff were so supportive with me, they looked after me very well and thankfully… all was well. Phew, what a relief!!!
So I wish you all the very best when you go for your first check up mammogram!!
Take care, xx
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Hi, laineyh. I had my first partial mammogram (just the cancer boob) after my lumpectomy and I was doing my best not to worry about it. I had a large seroma on my cancer boob and the test hurt like hell. When I got to my surgeon a week afterwards, he drained my boob (45 cc) and I felt so much better. No evidence of cancer. Yay! Now I have my first full mammogram coming up in October.
I’m starting to feel like cancer doesn’t define me anymore. I still have my emotional ups and downs and I’m still hyperaware about my whole body. I now tell people that I’m cancer free until further notice.
I stopped my hormone treatment, too. I’m almost 68 and didn’t want to live my “golden years” with more joint pain and depression that I already have. Cancer is always going to linger in the back of my mind but the farther away I get from my initial diagnosis the better I’m able to quiet that annoying little ghost. I just take it a day at a time and let the emotions out so they don’t overwhelm me.
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I agree with former comments… you are normal feeling as you do. My recommendation would be to be honest about it to people around you.
My first annual mammogram really hurt and was done by a rather brusk and unsympathetic member of staff. My cancer doesn’t show up well on mammograms and I’d like an mri, (which has been refused) , so I feel unsure of results given anyway. I don’t know an other circumstance in which a test is done knowing it is an unreliable measure of assessment - what’s the point!
I was quite emotional and crying for no reason so I’ve started some counselling… they can’t change your situation but it can give greater insight into you and how to cope.
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I have good news, my mammogram was classed as ‘normal’. I doubt it could look quite how a pre-treated cancer-free breast would look given the oedema and maybe some fibrosis, so I think the term is relative. I’ll take it though, nice to have good news ( it also arrived on my birthday which would of spoilt the day had it been otherwise).
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Great news @entropy
I have my second annual mammogram this Friday. The anxiety has already started and I will have to wait a minimum of two weeks for the results. It doesn’t get any easier.
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Hope all goes well tomorrow
Xx
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Thank you for thinking of me @chillout365
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Good luck for Friday naughty-boob fingers crossed for you.
Hugs Tili 
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Thank you @Tili
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Good luck .
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Hi. Thanks for all your lovely messages. I had my mammogram a couple of weeks ago and the results came back all clear. I am so relieved 
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Great news @laineyh
Mammogram done, less pain than last year so time and massaging has definitely helped. Only downside is they said it will be up to 2 weeks to review and 4 weeks for my letter.
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