Well got all dressed up and went out for supper on Sat. All my food tasted horrid, spring rolls were like cardboard and the pasta tasted of nothing. The wig looked ok but now I hate it. My mouth is so sore I can’t cope with it and I am taking the same stuff as many of you for these horrid symptoms. This CMF is horrid and I don’t like it, I feel like throwing the towel in now, how much have we got to endure?
I know I am a moaning Minnie ! Sorry about that. Hair grows back on CMF so waiting for a sign there, eyelashes and brows still sparse too.
The only thing that helps is a sleeping tablet at night.
I had BC 11 years ago and I thought that was it for me. I have no children which I regret now I guess I did not meet the right person. I have worked as cabin crew all my working life I guess Rolling Stones gather no moss. I have Trevor now and we are happy but this is difficult to handle this time round.
Debra.
xx
So glad I managed to raise a smile 
.
Lori, it’s good to have you back. Gee whizz, number five!
Kate, that shampoo you have might work like fake tan - then again with all the rain we’ve had recently might end up a bit streaky!
Judy, glad I managed to make you laugh - anything for a bit of light relief in the s/e days!
Mel, I love Miranda. My OH likes watching me watching her because I laugh so much - I even cheer when she gets her man!
Amber, enjoy tomorrow evening (goes without saying). Get there in plenty time because in Manchester they came on stage exactly on schedule. Olly Murs is definitely worth seeing too!
Angie, looks like you’ve turned the corner. Hope you have a better few days!
Philomena, a meet-up next April, one year on, is a great idea. Lets get working on it.
Rod was just lovely last night. Fortunately, we were sat in pensioner’s corner so didn’t have to stand all night. Still, did a lot of singing, swaying and arm waving.
Having a night away tomorrow. It’s anniversary time. Hope the tastebuds return so I can enjoy some decent food and wine. Hope the hangover feeling has gone so I can start on a real one 
.
Moira xxx
Hi Debra, just read your post and I just hope you soon feel a little bit better! This is such a hard road to go down, much harder than I had imagined and like you I am really fed up of feeling so awful. But as the old saying goes " what doesn’t kill you will cure you" then I think we can all understand that phrase. Remember we are all here for you, and as crap as all this is, it will soon be over and we will dine out on our chemo days, hopefully. The great thing I find about this group is that we all know how crAp things are and the ability of all the Angels to make it all bearable. we all have so much to live for and at times it is hard but better times are just around that corner, that I do know.xxx
Ok - we’re all dealing with a load of crap at the monent, but life isn’t all bad. How about naming 2 things each that gave been good about today to help us get some perspective back? As an example yesterday I got a super dooper hug off my daughter to make me feel better and I got to watch a whole series of Miranda, which made me laugh. Xx
Happy anniversary Moira. Have a good time tonight xx
Just a quickly, girls.
Those of you who have seen the Robster, roughly what time does Olly Murs come on stage?
Wishing you all minimal s/e today. Xxxx
Hi ladies you make me laugh and cry but makes it easier to keep going. Some things we can’t change but you all make the road easier to travel down. What made me feel good yesterday? Andy Murray got past the first round of Wimbledon, and a good friend phoned me last night to tell me she was going to be a Granny. Hope you all have a good day. Happy anniversary Moira. I’m going to meet another one of us today. Take care Lynn x
Happy anniversary Moira
As everyone has already said we can get through this and I hope we all have some good things in life that will keep us going and looking forward to the future, this rather large ‘blip’ on our lives can become history.
Two good things from yesterday, I managed to complete and submit both mine and my husbands tax returns, and my niece started talking wedding plans! 
Her husband to be is in Afghanistan at the moment but the discussions started! Woohoo! I’m looking forward to Xmas this year as hopefully I’ll be back to full ‘normality’, my nephew should be a fully fledged Royal Marine and her hubby to be will be back home…what a lot to celebrate!
I’m off for bloods today, via lunch with some ex colleagues and friends. Hopefully I’ll be fine despite being a bit spotty!
hope you all have a good day
Kate
x
Amber, he came on at half seven, on the dot in Manchester. Finished about 8.15, then Robbie at 9.
Thank you all for the good wishes. Mel, two things to be cheerful about: the sky is a fantastic blue this morning and I’m waiting for the taxi to take us to the train station 
Morning Ladies - hope you are all well
Mel A - what a great Idea! I’ll pre-empt 2 things today - going for lunch with one of my friends today and getting dressed / putting some slap on will make me feel good today
Moira - happy anniversary
Philomena - I’m up for a AAA bash next year!
Pauline xx
Morning Ladies
Mel A - what a great idea my two things are - today is my birthday and I have received some lovely cards and pressies and the weather is lovely and sunny. Slightly tainted by the fact I will be going for cycle 4 this afternoon after lunch with 2 of my nieces.
Moira - Happy anniversary have a lovely night away
Philomena - count me in for the AAA bash next year.
Amber have a great night with Robbie my OH has got me Wet Wet Wet tickets for my birthday
take care everyone and have a good day
Kim x
Debra there is no doubt that this gets harder as it goes on especially as you have been down this road before. I hope you have better days waiting round the corner and hope too you can have your spirits lifted by even the smallest things. It is tough, I thought knowing what each cycle would bring would make it easier to deal with but its not all physical SE’s there is also the emotional and mental aspects to get through - thinking of you and only wish could make it easier for you.
Moira, hope you have a lovely anniversary!
Pauline, I too am up and dressed although I have the energy of a sloth I am pushing myself out into some fresh air. Hope you enjoy your lunch out!
Mel A, great prompt to try and keep us focused that there are good things out there to give us a boost it is easy to loose sight of things when we are feeling so unwell and low.
Philomena, another great idea - to get together !
Happy Birthday Kim and good luck today!
Hope you all have a good or better day…
Love Lori xx
Happy birthday Kim. I hope your infusion goes well.
Philomena a meet up sounds great.
Amber enjoy your concert.
Pauline enjoy your lunch out.
Lyn your friend must be so excited.
Katie - wedding plans how exciting! Does that mean a good shopping trip too?
Afternoon Angels,
2 great things today… Sunshine - welcome back it’s been so long! And the discovery of Del Monte frozen smoothies, currently £1 for 3 special offer at Tesco. Ideal for everyone with mouth problems, and they taste just great.
Glad you all like the idea of a meet up, just need to work out where, Im easy, so don’t mind where.
onwards and upwards x
…oh god I am so sick of this journey!
Best made plans - up and dressed ready to go out only to be faced with cold sweats, the runs and not enough energy to walk the length of myself. Maybe get over the door tomorrow, fingers crossed!
Lx
lori - im with you on that one, i’m sick of it too. my daughters coming up from england for the next one so at least that wont be so bad, distraction and 24 hour help. its just not coming quick enough for me.
kim - happy birthday, what a present, no 4, hope it goes well.
moira - happy anniversary
Pauline - how are you feeling now?
MelA - so positive, thankyou, my two things are my daughter visiting for 2 weeks, cant wait and i ate a proper dinner with mashed tatties and haddock and parsley sauce, first tome for over a week.
kate - busy busy, lots to do for a wedding, hope your bloods good
philomena - so cheerful
amber - hope your concert goes well
lynn - strawberries and cream? plenty of tennis for those who are fans.
feeling no better but no worse, i am struggling with this one but waiting for the s/e’s to go away a bit. is the end in sight for a day7 tax?
i really fancy a cheeseburger from the market where my daughter lives. if only…
angie xx
Hi Angels
2 good things for today, Thai for lunch with friends and Tesco Express at the Esso garage on way home from the hospital have Cadburys chocolate buttons in big bags half price! What more can a girl on chemo wish for???
Lori - sorry to hear your plans went awry, hope tomorrow is a better day for you.
Mel - yes shopping will be required. In fact I was doing online hunting yesterday for ice cream wedding cakes! Yep I might only be the bride to be’s Auntie but my suggestions are all being actively considered - or maybe they are just humouring the ‘bald Aunt’! 
Happy Birthday Kim, hope the infusion went well and you can celebrate next week when you are back to normal.
I’m up for a get together next year, presumably somewhere in the middle of the country would be most appropriate as we have John O’Groats residents and I’m south coast of England…or maybe somewhere in Scotland as John O’Groats is definitely a long way North! I hear it might have stopped snowing in Edinburgh by May 2014…
Hope everyone else is feeling a little better today and starting to see the end of the SE’s for this cycle.
Kate
x
Hiya all
Two good things about today. I’ve started to feel a bit better this afternoon and I even managed to sit outside in the sun for a bit. I just need my stomach to settle now.
Lori - I’m sorry you didn’t make your trip out.
Kate - an ice cream wedding cake sounds awesome. Helping with the plans will certainly give you something to look forward to.
Angie - I’m glad you finally managed to eat something. If this TAX has its way we certainly won’t be looking like shot -putters at the end of our chemo.
Take care ladies xx
Hi Debra,
I am totally with you on all these feelings you’re having. I have felt really down for a couple of weeks now and have also had feelings of throwing the towel in and letting nature take it’s course. I took the last tablets of this cycle yesterday and am now on my tablet free week before it all starts again next Tuesday. I sat in the kitchen yesterday morning with all the pills in front of me and could’ve cried, I really didn’t want to take any more. Thing is, I don’t want to die either so I’m trying to pull myself together and keep telling myself not to be so soft. There are lots of lovely ladies on here who are probably having worse side effects than me and are coping with it.
I think the worst thing is the not knowing. I asked my onc if they did tests after treatment to see if it had all gone and would he tell me that I was in remission. He said no, there wouldn’t be any tests, they just deal with it if you present any other symptoms.
Sorry for moaning but it helps to write things down on here, don’t want to talk to OH or kids as I know it upsets everyone, although they try to hide it.
Have spoken to my BCN and she suggested talking to a psychologist. They might help me to rationalise everything. I’m going to try it, after all it can’t hurt and it won’t have any side effects!
Karen xxx