OH pauline I laughed so much I nearly rolled off the bed. I’ve decided not to tell anyone I’m fine as I’m not. At the moment I just say well I’ve been better…
Mel x
Moira what a fab video. My happy dance is on the 1st August like yours.
Mel I’m so sorry your holiday was cut short in such a horrible way. I hope you manage to escape soon.
Pauline happy belated birthday.
I hope the chemo went ok today Philomena.
I saw the oncologist today. Bloods good to go and after describing the numerous SEs she decided to lower the dose of my next docetaxol and gave me a prescription for numerous items. I hadn’t realised how many SEs I’d had until I found myself saying ‘oh and…’. I had to laugh at the end and say ‘but I feel good today’.
I’ve started to notice that this is all starting to take its toll on my family members now. My hubby is having a relapse with his MS, brought on by stress; my 9 year old daughter got upset tonight and said she gets scared when I go for chemo in case I don’t come home and when will things get back to normal? My nana came home from hospital today after being ill herself and said that she couldn’t wait for it all to be over. It makes me think that the emotional ups and downs of late are a natural reaction to the stress which has been ongoing since January as it seems to hitting us all. I defy anyone to stay positive for this long without cracking from time to time. We’re doing amazingly well and I agree that the support we have given each other has helped us stay sane and get through it together.
Good luck to those on the chemo train this week. I hope this one is kinder to you this time Angie xx
Hey Girls I am with you there on telling it like it is as I am sure the majority who have not had the misfortune of experiencing this so close to home that once the chemo stops we will just bounce back to where we were before (except of course the immediate family/friends that are going through this with us).
Met with my surgeon for last expander fill today, he was very pleased with progress from surgery so far and commented That I looked like I was fighting this very well and was looking good (nice man!) Anyway he doesn’t need to see me again for 3-4 months now until we start discussing reconstruction so I need to start thinking about that and what road to take there. He has referred me to talk with a psychologist in the meantime I guess to ensure my head is catching up with what my body has gone through.
Pauline I hope you don’t suffer as much this time round with the stronger pain relief and mouth medication, I will be trying to get different painkillers this time too! I have also had sore feet n hands with terrible water retention, one day I hardly pee’d at all and have swollen ankles…crikey between that and all the pill popping I feel like I’ve gained a few years as this is all stuff my Mum suffers from!
Judy, we were off having fish n chips tonight too, glad I read your post later or would have been paranoid about my nose!! Hope your feeling better soon.
Started on the steroids today but took them really early so sleep kicking in now…fingers crossed might try reading for while just to make sure I get off to peepy papas!
Night night, thinking of you all.
Love Lori xx
Hi Mel,
I agree with you that it’s so hard for the loved ones seeing this day to day and heart breaking to see the effects it has on them we are help less in the fact that we can’t fix them emotionally any better than they can fix us physically all we can do is be there for each other and reassure each other that this journey will be over soon. I hope and am sure you can reassure your daughter and also hope your hubby starts to improve and feel better soon. Love and best wishes thinking about you all.
Lori xx
I thought chemo brain was really taking the p*ss this morning when I couldn’t find my glasses, I was looking everywhere but thinking, well I wore them last night. I usually leave them on the nest of tables next to me, when I go to bed. So I couldn’t understand why they weren’t there this morning. I’ve searched the kitchen and my handbag, looked all around the living room and was really starting to think I had lost the plot, until I looked at the dog. He was laid in his bed asleep but peeping out from under him was the arm of my glasses. The little buggier must have got on the sofa and pinched them, he has done it before with my head scarf or hat if I have left it in the room on the table overnight. Now I can understand that, I mean they’re material and they’re probably adding a bit more padding to his bed … But my glasses! Thankfully they’re all intact with no marks.
Cheers Judy for that wonderful picture of the dog and glasses, a great early morning pick up.
all s/e well under control today, and have had a power breakfast of expresso and chocolate croissant, I will be popping into work to his morning to hand in my 3 month sick cert and a chat. Quite looking forward to it. Although my oh works in the same place he never picks up any gossip! Ill find out more in five minutes than he has in the last 6 months.
dont think I will need to worry about sunscreen today as the sun has deserted us here in Norwich.
MEL I so agree with you with the fall out of this BC, particularly when we are having the bad days its so hard on the us all. My brother in law was diagnosed last week with a malignant stomach tumour, and I feel so sorry for my sister in particular, as we are really close and now has to worry about the two of us!
Have a good day Angels, onwards and upwards
MEL so sorry your family are having a tough time. It’s hard for all the people around us to keep positive and cope with this all the time.I hope your oh improves soon. Sending love and hugs to you all.xxxxx
I’m still incarcerated as my stupid temperature will not stay down. I keep sticking my bald head under the cold tap and then sitting in front of the fan, but its not fooling them. V fed up as I feel absolutely fine and I’m missing my entire holiday stuck in here. Still on iv antibiotics, for unspecified infection that no one can find. Have had needles stuck in every concievable bit of my body. I accept I might need to be in hospital but don’t see why I can’tjust go home and be in there. I could be there in 3 hours!! Seems so ridiculous when I’ve had other weeks feeling SO I’ll.
JUDY your dog must really love you he just wants anything of yours doesn’t he?it’ll be the wig next!
Good luck everyone with all the horrible s/es and anyone having treatment this week.
Love mel xxx
Hi Angels
Have been feeling good so out in the sunshine or in my studio. Despite trying to catch a little sun I still have a 2 tone head!! 
I have no. 5 next week so Lynn I am with you, last one is due 8 August.
Pauline - belated Happy Birthday!
Nice to catch up om everyone’s posts. Take care all xx
Fec-T cycle 5 Tax day 9
Whew, think I’ve managed to get off the rollercoaster, feel a lot better today. Been out for a walk with oh and dogs this morning all be it about 30mins but that’s a big achievement at the moment. Thank you all so much for your support which helped me get through the last few days.
Judy read your post whilst having breakfast and it just made me laugh so much. One of our dogs is a bit like yours and it reminded me of the time when he stole my mobile phone. Eventually had to ring my number to see if I could find it and low and behold it was tucked up in his bed under his blanket.
Pauline, definately with you on the eejits there’s some butes about. Cankles are definately in this summer, at least for us. I too have been sitting out and enjoying the sun, using factor 30 and have a nice tan only wish I could wear a bikini in the garden and take full advantage but that’s way too scary a picture.
Lori, Peepy Papas… Love it, wishing all the best for today
Mel A, hope your oh improves soon and your daughter is ok, it’s such a scary world for us and our families right now even though we all try to stay strong for each other. My eldest granddaughter who’s 6, was with me for part of my last chemo and took it all in her stride. We are totally open with the kids, cancer has unfortunately became part of their lives too but we talk about it so its not the big scary word that the older generation have made it in the past. They also have a friend the same age who has recently completed chemo after being diagnosed with Leukemia which has helped them accept my situation.
Philomena, chocolate croissants mmmm! My breakfast was definately boring. Sorry to hear about your brother in law I really feel for your sister, so hard.
its overcast this morning so no sun bathing, Iam a bit concerned about my affected arm and sunburn . I tan quite easily so don’t burn but does anybody know if the heat will have an impact on the risk of lymphodema as I had total clearance on that arm. Oh back to work again today but have my sister comming to stay Sat so counting the sleeps.
Wishing you all a minimal s/e day and good luck to all those on the chemo train xxx
Mel, sorry your still stuck in hospital, you’ll have to plan another break away, hope you escape soon xx
Glad you’re feeling a bit better Amber. It’s awful when you’re down.
Big hugs to you Mel. I’m sure you’ll escape soon.
Philomena I’m so sorry about your brother in law.
My oncologist told me to stay out of the sun, but I need some vitamin D so will sit out for a little while but factor up. Amber a booklet I have on lymphodema does say to avoid sunburn.
I’ve been pretty open with my kids about the cancer as I’ve gone along and tried to explain things to them. The best explanation I’ve managed is comparing it to the film ‘epic’ where the baddies tried to take over and destroy the green leaf men and the environment, but the chemo is helping the green leaf men win by killing off the bad guys. I’ve upped my fruit and veg intake significantly and I’m trying to get the kids to do the same. I told Hol that the green leaf men need that fruit and veg to help them. I’m hoping that helps, but I think she’s also finding it difficult that we just can’t do as much as we did before. We ended up laughing and I said I was asking santa for a haircut this Christmas.
I had to laugh on Monday I went to see a medium. I donned my wig and put makeup on so it wasn’t obvious that I was a cancer patient. The first message I got was the question ‘have I changed my hair?’ and that it was good that I’ve only just started to take good care of myself lately(whilst circling her face to indicate makeup). This really amused me as I like my comfort and never really wore make up until recently unless I was going out. The medium looked really embarrassed about saying it. She said the lady (Andy’s nana) was touching her head as if trying to preserve my hair. It really amused me My dad and grandad came through too. I was really glad I went and it really raised my spirits.
Love and hugs to everyone suffering from chemo SEs, emotions and temperatures. Hope they pass quickly. Xx
http://www.ted.com/talks/william\_li.html
Some of you might find this video clip interesting. He talks about cancer fighting foods.
Cycle 5 Herceptin/Docetaxol
Morning Angels. Mel how scary sweetie. I know and trust my hospital and BC nurses soooooo much as they know every little individual ache and pain Ive been through. Can you contact your own chemo suite for reassurance from time to time. Keep posting so that we know your ok. If not were all coming up the M5 in our PJ’s to get you. Take it easy. X
Yesterday I phoned the chemo suite as I had a prickly rash on my hands and then my lips went numb. Was told to get to the local Drs straight away. Checked me out and everthing ok he thought another possible side effect to Tax. So I was given antihistamine tablets and sent on my way. Phew! Still got it though as he said taking any antihistamines will make me very lathargic and tired and not to drive if so. Anyone else had a rash? I’m going to start taking the tablets tonight in the hope they help me to sleep and get rid of the rash at the same time.
Oh nearly forgot. Woke up yesterday to a lovely sunny morning but looking a little worse for wear. So decided to make an effort on the face and spent nearly half an hour in front of the mirror with lots of makeup and was pleased with the final result. Popped the kettle on and came on here to read the latest posts. Got to Moira’s post and clicked on the link to the youtube video. 5 minutes later my makeup was on my knees in about six tissues. LOL. I am now telling all family and freinds to watch it as it may give them a little peek into our world. Hope your all good and SE’s are doable. Lv n hugs. Sandy. x
Sandy I love the image of a bus load of bald women in pjs coming to fetch me made me smile, and I needed it as have just had complete meltdown. Dr came to see me to say antibiotics not working as had high temp again last night and infection markers in blood have gone up again. So they are adding more wide ranging antibiotics to iv, whereas they were hoping to move me to tablets. Just suddenly felt really scared when he’d gone. What if these don’t work either? I can sort of accept the idea the cancer might kill me, but supposing the chemo does? How stupid would that be? I suppose its being here miles from home and only oh for support( although he’s been great) I just fell apart. Had to find a corner in an empty room to cry my heart out. Nurses very kind but what can you say really?
Have asked if they can transfer me and they’re going to investigate but it looks like it would have to be an ambulance because they keep saying I could become very Ill very quickly. Just very scared. Oh on way. Glad I have you lot!
Mel x
Oh Mel you poor thing, it’s just crap being in hospital but it really is the best place for you, fingers crossed that they find out what’s causing the high temperature and the right drugs to bring it down. It sounds like they’re trying which is good, I bet your Oh is well fed up too. Thinking about you xx
sandy I had a rash which was really itchy around my neck and on my hands but it went with piriton and the antihistamine they prescribed.
Mel I would have been killing myself laughing with the medium, at least she’s cheered you up which is a good thing.
Glad your over the worst of it amber, you’ve done well, day 9. amber the dogs had my phone in the past too, I blamed my daughter and was calling her to high heaven, I rang her up to give her a peice of my mind but got the shock of my life when the phone was ringing from the dogs bed!
Oh Mel, there’s only one thing for it, we have to come and get you! Forget the bus it’ll take me too long, watch out for the helicopter landing and the baldy headed shot putter in her pjs running towards you! Seriously sweetie stick in there I realise how awful it must be but we are all with you, hopefully they’ll get you sorted soon. Sending you a massive hug xxx
Mel I’m so sorry you’re having it so rough. You can feel so isolated in hospital as it is, so I can imagine how awful it must feel in a place away from home. That was one of my worries about going to Plymouth in August. Unfortunately hospital is the best place to be in your situation and you will get through this. We’re all behind you. If we’re all migrating to Devonwith our bald heads we might have to perform our own version of the happy dance song though. The ward wouldn’t know what hit them! Love and hugs xx
Well Mel the idea of all us chemically unhinged shot putters descending on your ward doing the happy dance should be enough to get your doctors to release you. Or the thought of the same Angels wearing numerous pairs of glasses on various points of our bodies! Or Judys dog wearing glasses and answering the mobile. Any combination should be enough for immediate release on mental health grounds!! Seriously though all of us are with you the whole way.
onwards and upwards xxx
Realised when I wasn’t following some of the comments that I had somehow missed a whole page of posts. Mel - hope you are bearing up and the thoughts of dancing shot putters coming to your aid has put a smile on your face
Also loved the video clip.
Was just reading a thred on here about the tatoos that are used for lining up the radiotherapy. Given the position of my scar I am really set against having any permanent marks/constant reminders that will be visible when wearing V neck tops. I think there are alternatives to permanent tatoos but they mat not be offered or you might be talked out of it. Anyone had their planning meeting and have any thoughts or comments on this?
Carol x
Hello Angels. I have been reading your posts with interest and enjoyment since I joined the group in early May. As I live in Botswana and so far away from all of you, I have been reluctant to add messages as I didn’t really feel that I belonged to your UK group. However, since I am going through the same journey as all of you wonderful ladies, I just felt compelled to write today. Thank you so much for sharing your innermost feelings, for making me laugh and cry, for giving me hope and for the daily words of encouragement and cotinuous advice on how to get through this sometimes dreadful walk! I am half way through my chemo. Have had 4 sessions of Red Devil and next Friday drive five hours to Johannesburg South Africa to start my four sessions of three weekly Tax. Only after that will I be given surgery opinions. Some days I feel like this journey is never going to end. As most of you Angels are a few weeks ahead of me you will be doing your happy dance long before me. When I am struggling I try not to forget the suggestion to find just two good things that have happened in the day. I’m rather scared for my next course of chemo as many of you have found it quite hard. I am really feeling for Mel sitting in hospital today and so far from home, but how good to have all the Angels keeping you company and describing how they would like to fetch you. Thank you so much ladies for your daily messages. Of course, I should add that there is one thing that I’m not short of here and that is sun! Even in the middle of winter we are having lovely hot sunny days. Hope you all have a good evening. Julia