I have my breast clinic appt tomorrow and honestly I’m a complete mess. I’ve had a couple of wee meltdowns and just can’t seem to keep my mind off it all. So in a way I’m glad the wait is nearly over but now I’m worried I’m making the wrong decision in going alone. My husband isn’t the biggest fan of medical stuff and my friends are working or out of town and it would feel unfair to drag them into Glasgow at that time of the morning.
Edit - just had my appt, had mammogram then extra more in depth mammograms but doctor said just skin issue/scar tissue that’s not healing as quick due to location. Still a bit shell shocked but relieved it’s all over. Thank you all so so much for your support! I’d have lost my mind without it x
Hi 66cherry,
I would suggest taking someone with you,even if it is for morale support.I went alone thinking i would just have the mammogram and results 2 weeks later.I was told on the day they thought it was cancer,which it did turn out to be.By no means am i saying this will happen to you,but in hindsight i wish i had taken someone with me.All the best for tomorrow, remember wven if it does turn out to be breast cancer,there are so many options for treatment available now xx
I would definitely take someone with me if at all possible. It may even help your husband’s peace of mind to hear things first hand.
I totally understand your current distress. Waiting and not knowing is by far the worst place to be. Once you have the diagnosis and a path forward things do improve. That said it is a rollercoaster journey, but you will get through this.
Sadly I live in Devon, couldn’t be much further away, or I’d come with you.
Good luck for tomorrow and wishing you all the best for the coming months xx
I agree that if it’s at all possible then it’s best to take someone with you. I was told it was cancer on my first clinic appointment. My husband came with me and although I thought I had taken in everything I was told it soon became apparent that I hadn’t remembered quite a lot and had even totally made some bits up in my mind!!
Definitely yes, as you say you are a complete mess as I was and I didn’t take a thing in, just sat there like a zombie nodding. I took my husband but sadly at 84 all he said afterwards was “what did he say, I couldn’t hear a word”. So on my results appointment after the surgery my eldest son insisted on coming with me -he’d had cancer and understands what you are going through - he asked all the pertinent questions and when we came out he could explain to us both the next step and that “all edges were clear”. Once you’ve had this appointment you will be able to get your thoughts in order and although right now this might sound stupid but it will be easier to handle. Please let us know how you get on and remember we are all here for you and we’ve got your back. Big hug x
Please take someone with you.
If its good news then you can have a celebration on the way home.
If its not so good news it really helps to have someone by your side. My partner, also not so good with all things medical was with me when I was diagnosed last year. He asked all the things that I needed to, whilst I was just not taking it in.
I had my second screening during lockdown and was told not to bring anyone though a couple of the other ladies did. However my friend dropped me off at the Hospital and picked me up afterwards which was good because it was about an hour drive home and I had had my history taken by the BCN then a breast exam a mammogram an ultrasound scan another mammogram followed by a vacuum assisted biopsy then a consultation with the BCN who told me that it was almost definitely cancer ( albeit very small and early ) . It was about two and a half hours and very full on - I like to drive and I’m sure I would have been able to get myself back again safely but it was a relief not to have drive and to have my friend’s company though after the first couple of minutes and a few initial tears we talked about other things. I don’t know about taking someone in with you but maybe to pick you up afterwards - unless you are on public transport . Even if they don’t tell you or you are negative it’s quite tiring both emotionally and physically , though I have to say the staff were lovely.
I actually often prefer to go to appointments alone anyway ,the only problem I had with my partner not going was that it was not real for him. Initially he panicked and was very upset but after that because he had not been involved in the appointment although he knew it WAS real on some level he still didn’t believe it if that makes sense . As far as not taking it in that wasn’t a problem for me - it’s still etched on my memory now , also I’m a Nurse so I had an idea of what I wanted to ask . Whether or not you take someone in take a pencil and notebook and write things down and also any questions . You could also contact your BCN afterwards if you need to ask anything and they will make time to go through it with you .
We are all with you in spirit if not in person so let us know how it went - we’re here whatever the result .
A definate yes, if possible. I fully regret not taking someone with me. They had to repeat themselves a few times as I was in shock with diagnosis. Also pen and paper to write notes as there could be a lot of info. The nurse and doctor were both lovely and took their time. Very comforting and reassuring. Best wishes x
I’m a nurse too so usually am happy to just get peace and quiet to read my book while waiting! But I have been getting more worked up, especially reading others stories and knowing if it is something they might be able to tel me there and then rather than coming back for results.
Husband has a routine appt first thing too so have agreed he’ll come after which will spare him some of the terribly boring bit but means he’s around if needed later on xx
Thank you that’s what I’m afraid of. I know most likely I’ll be lucky but it’s the what if I’m not and suddenly have to start processing lots of difficult info. Pen and paper is a good shout too, usually I take notes on my phone but I might want physical notes if it’s that bad.
I’m so sorry you went through that alone; it sounds awful Husband has a routine appt first thing too so have agreed he’ll come after which will spare him some of the terribly boring bit but means he’s around if needed later on xx
If it’s good news I’ll likely have to go to work but he will be good at making sure I stop and have a hot drink and something to eat to calm the f down before dashing off!!!
Glad you have decided to meet your husband afterwards.
I take notes on my phone at all appointments & have questions written there to remind me too. All consultants have been absolutely fine with this.
Its a very worrying time & i understand why you are finding it difficut. Do you know what yo expect at the appointment, so that you are prepared?
@clarahippy please do take someone it’s incredible how much you don’t take in at these appointments, apparently the facts are that you can only take 20% of the information and it really helps to have somebody there who can hear perhaps different information that you have heard. Also I found that when I was doubting myself my partner would relay something positive that the surgeon said that I had forgotten. Also that person could take notes. It is good to also have a list of questions as time goes very fast there. Good luck.
It’s good that he will be around to support you afterwards and I hope that everything goes well . Sometimes being a Nurse I do think I can handle stuff and I can never fully turn my professional head off but at the same time you really can’t be your own Nurse ! Xx
Yes, def. have someone with you, it’s a lot to take in, i remember the consultant saying to me do you understand what i’m telling you, i just drifted off. Luckily my husband was there. Wishing you well. x
Absolutely have someone with you and ask the chaperone to help you too
Please write down your questions and ask as many as you need and ask them for any news, results etc in writing too
My hospital has an app and all my letters and results get shared in it
I’m one of these people that prefer to go myself.
I had to go to Breast Screening in Irvine.
My husband was in the car waiting. My choice to go in myself. It was when I had to wait 10 days and go back up to Irvine for results of my biopsy I just took all leaflets and write down the date of my lympectomy and lymph nodes biopsy.
I did take hubby in when I had to meet my oncologist at my hospital after Crosshouse had signed to back to DGRI. MY PROBLEM IS MY HUBBY IS DEAF. But having to go to Edinburgh for radiotherapy my hubby was my rock. But hopefully you won’t need anymore than your appointment to say it’s clear. Good luck
I was advised by a GP friend to record all my appointments on my phone. Its amazing what you miss and means you can try and concentrate on what is being said. I found it easier than writing. My very best wishes going forward.
Husband has a routine appt first thing too so have agreed he’ll come after which will spare him some of the terribly boring bit but means he’s around if needed later on xx
but he will be good at making sure I stop and have a hot drink and something to eat to calm the f down before dashing off!!!