I’m not doing so well at having fun
Not getting on so well with my OH
Long story (our dog is a problem and is unpredictable, it’s totally his dog and has gone for me a few times, he is struggling to get rid of him and I’m struggling with him not doing anything about it. Add the pressure of the tests and it’s not good. I think he’s really depressed and I dont know what to do. It’s taking all my energy to do the new job
He’s not happy about the new job, thinks it was a stupid idea and I’m too stressed which I don’t think I am but I just can’t cope with lots of crap on top of it if that makes sense. Argh ah well it will hopefully work itself out x
Yay re your heating though ?
I don’t know what he is expecting of you re the running. I wonder if he thinks ‘if we just do the things we used to it will just click and everything will be back to normal again’ as he does seem to keep pushing you with it. Did you feel OK afterward? better for trying or upset as you’re not quite back where you were?
Thanks re the job I know you’re right,I think he’s just at his limit re the stress of everything.i tried to make him come out for a walk with me tonight to try and start some exercise going as I thibk that would make him feel better but he had got a painful lump on the Base of his foot which I think is plantar faciatis so he didn’t want to.not sure what else to do other than to never tell him my problems or worries again lol. I honestly think if we can remove the dog it will sort it but not sure anyone will take him xx
Yes I’m really sad for him re the dog too, not least because he prefers dogs to humans. However I’m not sure how he will feel if the dog hurts me more than he has already! Thanks for the suggestion re rolling pin. I will suggest it. Maybe it is a midlife crisis. Although I think partly it’s just too many rubbish things all together quite young, both our mums died of cancer within 9months of each other then two years later our brother in law (his best mate) died in an accident then I get breast cancer and then my was ill two years after that and required lots of care and then passed away, and we have the infertility thing and I’ve got lymphoedema as well. All in all its quite a lot. I know it’s not as bad as some people, and we are really lucky in lots of ways, but I just don’t know if losing the dog is a bridge too far for him. However I can’t live with it Ny more so it’s one or the other and that is horrible x
Sorry I meant to say hurrah hurrah hooray hurrah for your penultimate jab. You are brilliant and nearly there. Sorry it’s hurting blooming thing! X
Yeah I bet. We are sp lucky to have people like you working in the NHS x
No not at all. I think mine reads weird looking back at it. I genuinely mean it. It’s such a hard job thank God for all the people who do it x
How are you feeling after the injection now? Z
Yes it’s nice to not have to worry about work. And after the way it’s been sounds like a break from it is just the ticket. Have you got anything planned? Or just not rushing around for a few days.I have time off coming up three days next week and two the following. Will be nice to be off x
Sounds like a good plan.
I’m sure you’ll feel better after the injections finish x
Ah I’m glad.im off for a few days now too whoop whoop.
Also had my results. Womb isn’t cancer hurrah. He wants to do another test under general to see if it’s a polyp xx
Oh no what’s going on? Are you ok? Men!!! I am about to leave mine to spend lots of time with my family on my own and not really have a birthday as he hasn’t sorted the dog out.
I’ve been reading about the laproscopy that I will have next. Totally would prefer to stop having things done lol x
He’s just being moody and feeling hard done by! Also I am going away for the weekend ( his idea!) with my eldest to an athletic meeting.
Sorry you are having a hard time. Don’t know what you can do about the dog. It’s funny, if I remember right he was worried about your health being affected if you changed jobs, but he is leaving you at risk with the dog. That is just such a man thing. No matter how much we might love them we are often miles apart.
Don’t worry about the laparoscopy.
X
Yeah it’s funny isn’t it. He can’t see it. Hey ho. I know he doesn’t mean it, but then part of me can’t deal with it, if that makes sense. A break will be good. As I said before I think this has just been too much for him. So need to keep that in mind. Re yours I wonder if it’s a similar thing,and it just comes out weird. Some time away will be a nice break for you too. We just need to stop worrying about them xxxxxx thanks for listening as ever xxxx
Oh I’m sure you won’t! Its weird how superstitious you get isn’t It? Hope it goes well xxx
Ah what a shame!
Typical eh? Can’t be helped though. When are you back in work? I’m enjoying being off lol x
Go back tomorrow. Surgery is on 12th so need to let them know. Typical when I have a new job. How are you? X
Wow, last one! Can’t believe it! How are you feeling? It’s weird stopping I find. On one hand you’re so happy but then there’s the comfort of the feeling that treatment is preventing recurrence…
Fab news re your youngest ???
Are you ok? Sound a bit flat? 10 days off will be good, sorry am being thick what is a low hb? x
Ah that makes sense hb lol. Maybe the supplements will work. Deffo work a try.
You are allowed to feel like this. I think it’s really normal. You are not going to just slip back into your old ways and it’s hard. It’s just not a straight Road my love.
He doesn’t help by adding a layer of criticism really does he? I think it comes from a place where he just wants you to be the old you too. So you both want the same thing. But he hasn’t been through what you’ve been through so instead of seeing the trauma and barriers you’ve experienced he can only think it’s something that you’re doing to yourself. I think its hard when people can’t see the affects visibly. It also feels like he takes a tough love approach as he thinks it will motivate you, but you are still healing and so it has the opposite affect as you have enough to deal with. God I’m just wittering aren’t I? I just think he means well but his methods are a bit rubbish. Which means you need to be extra strong and by that I mean don’t beat yourself up for not being ‘back to normal’, allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling, if you repress it, it will build up and get bigger. If you acknowledge it and recognise it for what it is, it will be easier to move past it. And you will move past it, of course you will, but it needs to be in your own time and onyour own terms. If there’s anything I can do let me know xxxxxx
Hooray! Well done you!!! I’m so pleased.
I’m sure you will feel better moving forward. I know what you mean re people forgetting. It’s easier for them than us though eh?
No movement on the dog. I went round to my cousin and saw her and my aunt, drank a couple of gins and went on about it and now I feel guilty talking about it. Makes me hate myself. I wish I was nicer and didn’t blurt things out to people then regret it
But he’s doing the whole ‘lets deal with one thing at a time’ surgery is weds. I know it’s not a major surgery but I don’t want it. At least it will be over quickly and then it’s easter and I can stop feeling so blooming miserable!
Are you going to mark the end of the injections in some way? My cousin said I should have a party for my five years post treatment, and to stop waiting for things to be better and just enjoy what I have now x