I am Deb’s husband Ian. I just wanted to post a short message to mark the passing of my darling wife. I hope it is not against the rules for a partner of the recently deceased to post here.
I am not a great one for words, unlike Debs who could express herself with a turn of phrase that could be wise, succinct and hilarious all at the same time. She was a lousy speller though.
In all aspects of our life together for the past 13 years, Debs has always looked after and cared for me and her kids. In the battle against this cruel disease she made it so much easier for me by ALWAYS being strong, whether she was laughing, crying or pi**ed-off. We were a partnership in everything but she carried the greater load.
When she was in campaigning mode, she always did it with a view to helping the little old lady, as she put it, who would never dare question or kick up a fuss.
The only time I have ever felt I needed outside help was in the past four days when the brain mets seemed to have come back with an incredible and devastating vengeance and robbed her most of her ability to talk and otherwise communicate except through those beautiful, blue twinkling eyes.
Debs was initially given about a year to live and when we married we never dared dream we would celebrate our fifth anniversary. For this, my eternal gratitude goes to the medical teams at the Treliske hospital and in St Ives - our GP practice, the district nurses and all other support teams.
Debs had her two daughters and her son-in-law by her side. The disease was advancing so rapidly They travelled the hundreds of miles to be with her and arrived with just hours to spare. I must thank the Macmillan nurse for being so honest and, well, blunt when she told me we had maybe a couple of days rather than up to a couple of weeks left with each other. She remained conscious just long enough to know they were there and to whisper a couple of words of comfort and love to each of them. She then slipped into a state of unconsciousness until almost the very end.
Five minutes before she passed away, in a final massive effort she opened her eyes so we could each gaze into those gorgeous baby-blues and say goodbye and profess our eternal love. So typical of the woman’s determination and courage.
Debs died at 2.47am Thursday 17th December in her own home.
I will love you forever Debs. Thank you for the absolute honour of being your husband and friend.