Feel like I been hit by a train

So I went today expecting to just be told when my rads start but been totally side swiped. Cancer in 4 out if 5 lymph nodes so everything has changed. Need more nodes removed with drain surgery on 7th September… need a ct scan to make sure not spread also 6 sessions of chemo then rads then tablets. I went today expecting to be told clear margins and no lymph node involvement and feel like my whole world has caved in ???x

Sue, I am so sorry to hear that and I don’t know what else to say really only that you are in my thoughts and sending a big hug to you xxx

Oh Sue, so sorry to hear it wasn’t what you expected, what a shock for you. 

Sending hugs

ann x

Hi Sue,sorry you have had bad news,nothing we can say today that will make you feel any better apart from that many ladies on this forum have been in same situation and its a tough road but eventually there is light at the end of the tunnel- just takes a bit longer to get there .

I wish i could find the rights words to comfort you, but I really don’t know what they are, except to say  that I have 3 friends who had breast cancer all of whom had extensive treatment all of whom are still going strong 7 years later.  I know it sounds completely trite but it is true it’s amazing what they can do now.  I am saying this having been told today that I have to have a mastectomy, and that at this stage they do not think there is any lymph node involvement,  in the next breath the consultant said they cannot be certain.  While I was axpecting it,   I am still in shock.  I just want to curl up and vanish. I know I cannot and I know I have to be brave and tell myself it could be worse I have to keep going for my children and grandchildren, but just tonight I am having a night off and feeling sorry for myself, I shall eat and drink whatever I want and hopefully get up tomorrow ready to face whatever is thrown at me.  you are absolutely entitled to feel as you do, i don’t know about you but for me it’s the total loss of control,  there is nothing I can do about it.  The only thing I think I can do is keep as well and strong as possible, so I am in the best condition I can be to face the future.   My thoughts and prayers are with you

Omg sue im so sorry to hear this, ive been thinking of you all day, from what ive seen you post you are a very strong lady, you can do this, we are all be behind you, big hugs too you xxx

Debbie xx

Thank you all for your kind wishes at the moment my head is shot but give me a day and I am sure I will start to feel more positive again xx

That bloody train seems to come along a lot with this dreadful disease. Stay strong and positive if you can (easier said than done I know). Sending hugs xxxxx

 

Hi Sue

 

Really sorry to hear your news. I’m still a total newbie to all this breast cancer stuff so I don’t have any words of wisdom or useful advice to impart but you’ll get through this. We all will and we’ll all be here to offer each other whatever support we can. Well, as much support as is possible over the internet. I know even when I don’t really have time to post here or respond to people (sorry about that, life just gets in the way sometimes) I do find it a comfort to have a quick read of the forum in the odd snatched five minutes I might get. 

 

Stay strong Sue xxx

Oh no Sue, so so sorry to hear you did you get the news you were expecting. But once you get your head around this you WILL cope. We are all in this together and you have been around for me and I will be here for you.
Be kind to yourself. Sending hugs and positive thoughts.
Shirley xxxx

Sue

 

I am so sorry to hear that you did not get the results you were hoping for.  I know it might not feel like it now but once you have had chance to take it all in and you get your new treatment plan you will be able to move forward.  This is doable and you can get through it, it might be worth going on to the Going Through Treatment section where there are threads for chemo and the lovely ladies on there will be able to help and support you

 

You are in my thoughts tonight and sending you a hug xxxxx

Sue sorry to hear that your results weren’t what you were hoping. I know from experience that this does really rock your whole world.
I went from it being a cyst to pre cancerous to grade 2/3 and that’s when it all caved in.
But … I have had further surgery as margins weren’t clear and I had nodal involvement so I had 6 cycles of chemo and 20 rounds if radiiotherapy and will take tamoxifen for 10 years. It is doable, it’s tough at times but join the monthly chemo thread as there will be ladies like you going through the same.
I finished chemo end of April and rads end of June. I’m now taking time to recover and get my head round things.
Take each stage at a time, don’t google and know that you will come out the other side. Take care. Xx

Hi Sue,

 

I was in your shoes roughly this time two years ago. Consultant was convinced there was no spread to nodes after several biopsies and ultrasound seemed to indicate clear. I was gobsmacked when I found out at my results meeting that one node had a large macromet and my tumour was 4cm instead of 2cm and that it was now chemo instead of just going straight to hormone therapy as I’d been lead to believe. Never thought I’d get to the other side and enjoy life again but I did and I am. And so will you. None of it was as horrible as I imagined. 

 

Your team will make sure you get the best treatment plan for your particular needs and there is loads of support here from those who have been through it all and those who are going through it at the same time as you.

 

Indulge yourself this evening. 

 

Ruth xx

My tumour was grade 2 and originally thought to be 37mm but was bigger as I was in shock I didn’t even ask what size when he told me my scans indicated no node involvement guess them bc cells are sneaky little buggers x

Oh sueW, I’m so sorry to read this and sorry you didn’t get the results you were expecting. I can Imagine you feel the rug has been pulled from underneath you. Take time to process it all as you need to. Focus on the next step. X

 

Thinking of you SueW…big hugs xx

Thanks all I think I have said every swear word I know tonight but determined to feel better tomorrow x

SueW
Not the results you wanted but at least you can and are going to be treated!
Lady, you’ve got plenty of YMCA to do even though right now you are probably thinking f…YMCA!!! I really do know how you feel and I cried, ranted and raved at the surgeon, the nurse, my friend and then went to hers and cried non stop for 2 hours. In the end she shut me up with a whisky or two! It was so surreal! But after that day I got my thinking cap on, pulled myself together and started to plan and prepare and do some research into my treatment plan!
Every day got a little bit easier and yes, it will be a journey but it’s a journey to get us well again and I’m trying to think that whatever treatment they give is to help us to get better! Easier said than done but we can do it!!! We are all joined together for all the support we can give to each another and will all get through this! It is pants but at least we can be mended. Lots of love.xxx

Good morning sue,

 

Just wanted to give you a morning hug, hope you managed some sleep last night and feel a little better after  that bloody train, i had abit of a rough night myself last night, im all good, but im now worrying about my hubby after some not good results.

 

I half expected to find you as an early bird having coffee and bananas with me ha ha.

 

Debbie xx

Sue, I’m so sorry to hear you not great news. But remember, you’ve been through all of this so far with strength, bravery and a great sense of humour and you will get through this next lot of treatment the same way.  You’ve got this! 

 

fight on black.jpg

 

Massive love and hugs xxxx