Bit of a long drunken post last night eh? Sorry! No hangover though! Think it was cos it was v expensive red wine! I was up late as you can see but about 2 hours of that was tidying up and washing up cos I hate getting up in the morning to devastation! Nothing broken this morning and everything away where it should be so can’t have been too bad!
Think I’m gonna go for feasting pre next kimo and take my chances cos I know I wont feel like any of afterwards and the kids will probably have eaten all the chocolate by the time I feel like eating it again! Good luck for your bloods and chemo Lorna (my bloods/Onc appt is at 10.30 tom and kimo at 1.30 tuesday so much more civilised!).
I know what you mean about the flat bit Caz, I think as soon as boxing day was over I felt like xmas had never happened! Hope you enjoy the film this arvo.
Me and OH went out to look around some sales earlier and ended up spending £120 on a new dinner service (excluding cutlery!!) cos the one we liked wasn’t in the sales (typical!). Its a lot of money but we entertain quite regularly and decided to call it our anniversary present to ourselves as we’ve been together for 15 years on tuesday and the only dinner service we had was one he had when we met!
Hi
Just a quickie ( said the bishop to the actress ) the film was great, really funny, lots of good jokes for adults too. Well worth going to see.
Then went to Frankie and Bennies and had rack of ribs - delicious - ate far too much, now vegged out on sofa.
Hi everyone, sounds like Christmas is over and we’re back on the chemo-roll, hence the flat feeling - I am getting FECced again on Tuesday so won’t be partying at New Year, more likely to be fast asleep with steroid and Neulasta dreams, great!
Had my last alcohol tonight as I think alcohol the night before FEC might increase the SEs.
I have eaten SO much, daren’t weigh myself til after chemo is over and I can do something about the weight gain! Although the good news is that like Ostrich I have a bit of bum fluff on my head too!
Love to all
Irina xxx
Hello All…how are those waistlines? Lucky for me I can’t eat more than a few mouthfuls at a time as I feel so bloated on this TAX, but thankfully my tastebuds seem to be able to tell the difference between sweet and savoury once again!
Cranberry juice is my ‘thing’ at the moment - I usually hate the stuff, but I am drinking it by the pint glass! Oh yes, and Green & Blacks Chocolate…nice and bitter.
I’ve had a couple of glasses of red wine, but it tastes so horrid I think I will stay off the alcohol til the end of kimo…oh my god…we can ctually start thinking about the end in real terms now. Irina - by Tuesday evening you will be able to really see the end - wow!
I have slept like a baby the last 36 hours yesterday I felt like I had the worse dose of flu ever and just about made it up and down stairs. Today I’ve got up and taken the car into get serviced, and 4 Legs and I walked 3 miles home…albeit slowly!
Hope the rest of you who’ve not been on for a couple of days are still in celebration mode and not suffering…
It’s good to hear that you all mostly had a good Christmas - so did I with my parents here. I managed to cook up a feast so we now have lots of lovely leftovers to munch.
I’ve just had bloods done ready for FEC5 tomorrow - I’m actually looking forward to it because once it’s done there’s only one more to go - yippee!! I’m soooo looking forward to January, especially the end of when it will all be over - thank God!!
I’m possibly also going to see Take That in Cardiff in June (it depends on whether a friend has a spare ticket), which would be fantastic. I’m also planning lots of little and big treats to celebrate The End of Blo*dy Kimo. There’s Burns Night, my birthday on 2/2 (I’ll be 44), and 3 holidays hopefully, plus I might still do a pink party for my friends but I think it depends how tired I am.
It really is bizarre how slowly and quickly this time is going. Sometimes it seems forever, mostly when SEs are kicking in, then when (if?) we feel better time just whizzes past and it’s bloods time again. Let’s hope it all whizzes past for us all now and we successfully cross that finishing line.
Glad it was expensive wine Ostrich… and Happy Anniversary to you and OH x
Hi Bella … yep I am sort of looking forward to No.5! see the end in sight. thinking 6 weeks and it will be out of my system!!! and perhaps hair will grow (proper hair) some of it can stay away tho if you know what I mean :o) Does your friend have another spare ticket??? LOL … Burns night… are you scottish Bella? My Dad is… My Birthday is end of May… so hair hopefully+ will feel good by then… 41 next one… and I’m looking at hols too now… something to look forward to… thinking of Dubai … as my eldest was born there and always said I’d take him back to see it… left when he was 2 (changed in 13 years!)
I seriously think some wires have crossed in my brain… chemo brain! I go to say something and another word altogether comes out… same with typing, fingers hit wrong keys (alot more than is norm… which is quite a bit usually!)
Well meant to be writing an assignment on group dynamics… god help me… better get stuck in and get it done before next poison!
Have sis coming over tonight for a few glasses of champagne as my early New years eve… to celebrate the back of 2008!
It IS going to be a good 2009…one of my daughters has just announced she’s getting married again,(horrid, bitter divorce from 1st hubby who couldn’t keep his pants on when he was away from home!) and they have set the date for October, to allow me to get over my treatments and hopefully have some hair again!..two things to look forward to now…(going to Holland in March…assuming oncs allow it, and they don’t really have an option!..to see my favourite band)
Blimey Pheebs I haven’t walked 3 miles in months let alone doing so after tax!
Hi Bella, will keep fingers crossed for you that you make it to Take That!
Hope you are ok Caz and Cat, Soo and Avonlea, x
Who are you hoping to see Narnia?
Hope I haven’t missed anyone.
Just had bloods done for 4th FEC tomorrow, hopefully there was some blood in those tubes and not just alcohol!!!
Sat and watched, PS I love you! with my BF last night - bit too corny for me but was nice to snuggle under the duvet on the sofa with BF and drink vodka and eat pringles! Tonight I am having a bath and doing my jigsaw whilst drinking lots of non alcoholic liquid in prep for tomorrow.
If I don’t get on before here’s hoping you all have a brilliant New Years Eve if you are not suffering too much with SE’s or are between kimos.
We are having 2 friends round for drinks but mine will probably just be ginger beer as its the only thing that keeps the ickiness at bay so intending to sleep lots during the day to see if I can stay up until midnight and not feel too bad (steriods don’t keep me awake just make me fat - got weighed today and I have put on ten pounds since my DX - way too much sitting on my ar*e and eating too much!)
I’ll be 40 in March and have to say where as I wasn’t previous to BC overly thrilled with the idea now I can’t wait to get to my birthday!
Hi everyone - quick message I’m afraid as with hubby at home have had little access to the computer. Not looking forward to second shot of chemo during a school holiday as children so tiring to deal with but hey ho. What a lot of posts to catch up with.
Good luck tomorrow Irina and Bella and Ostrich - and to Lorna on Weds and Cat on Fri. Cazz are you partying this week 2 - I seem to think so, so good luck.
Good luck with your scan Soo - thought the chemo was this week - two weeks of that long journey for you though. You had a really rough ride with the SE’s this time. Glad to read on Facebook that you are feeling better now.
Pheebster - well done for escaping the hozzy - sounds like you have been having a right old time of it too. Hope you are feeling better.
Lorna - don’t envy you the assignment at all…
Fantastic news Narnia re your daughter’s forthcoming wedding - something to look forward to.
I’m sure that I will have missed someone so my apologies - all wired and mad as a hatter from the dexamethasone - 8mg this am at 10am and another 8mg due at 10pm tonight - oh joy!
Hope to get on before New Year but if not wishing everyone a very happy evening and celebration of better health and the imminent end of chemo in 2009. That should probably be the other way around. Thank you all for your support and friendship on this thread. It makes the whole thing so much more bearable.
So many new posts here. Nice to see what you have been up to.
Pheebs- just one thing my kimo nurse mentioned to me not to drink cranberry juice during kimo and that is the only food she mentioned not to take… sorry .but i just want to let you know this not sure if they are right or not… but i better let you know.
I am going to have 5th Fec tomorrow too - got a bit cold feet now to be honest- 4th one was not too much fun. Going to take me sleeping pill and go to have an early night
Good luck to all the buddies who s going to have another one this week… hope it goes well
Ostrich…we’re off to see Marillion, they have a fan convention every two years and this time it’s at center parcs in Porte Zeelande in Holland,three days worth of our favourite band with 3,000 other marillion fans!
Avonlea - thanks for that. I will check with my onc on Friday. luckily i only got the cranberry juice drink…so likely it is fairly weak stuff.
Hope all goes well for those partying over the next couple of days. And glad to see you are at home Tanya. How do you cope taking your dexa at 10 p.m? I have to take mine morning and lunchtime and still I can’t sleep!!
I am going to TK Maxx today to get some new cushions for the sofas and some lampshades for the bedroom…4 legs is going to Granny while we shop!
Have a nice New Year all those who may not be on in the next couple of days. I definitely wont be sad to see the back of 2008 and think I will shelve the celebrations to the end of January when kimo comes to a close.
On the plus side 2008 brought me the friendship of all you lovely ladies, without whom this would have been so much more difficult.
Hope you enjoyed TK max… Pheebster… and got what you wanted!
Hi Tanya… hope you are well… didn’t get the assignment done … naughty girl!
Ostrich, Bella and Irina Hope all went ok for you
Caz and Liz good luck
Cat … are you ok???
Everyone else hope you are OK
Just back from bloods at Hozzy! and they let me leave and said would phone me later (always usually stay and get results) and guess what… Can’t have Kimo tomoz! first clerk rang and said it was because I am changind from FEC75 to FEC60… (yippy… because of the tingling…neuropathy) and because is hol week the script for pharmacy couldn’t be done in time!! O but still come in at 8.30 for PICC tomorrow… it’s a joke I got there at 8.20am this morning after scraping inches of ice from my car… to then wait and hour to even be seen! … I get weighed EVERY time… but good news is NO weight gain this time… haha… and all those mince pies! but have put on a total of 8lbs since starting the Kimo… well I thought about it and thought why do i have to have picc tomorrow… so called back… they said O too busy next week so you have to… I was peeeed saying can’t I just have FEC75 tomorrow… I wanted to be done by 21st jan!!! was told… O no it’s not just the pharmacy… it’s your blood… too low at 0.8!!! so dame have to accept it… and a week out now… but hey a week more to party! I begged to not go tomorrow for picc said I will use it for wine on NYE if you put in tomorrow! well just had a call back saying OK we will wait and do picc next Wednesday!
This is just a quick message, apologies for not having been online at all to share in the Christmas good cheer. My thoughts are with everyone having a chemo party this week. I’ve been having a bit of a rough week. I’m OK in myself, the Tax SEs haven’t been too bad on the whole, but my mother has been staying for over a week and it’s been Hell. She’s a spoilt petulent woman, will be 80 next year, and always needs to be the centre of attention. Anything that’s happened to me has always been turned around so that she takes the spotlight and although the misfortune is mine, it’s all about how upset she is and how it affects her. I think with my bc she hasn’t been able to turn it around to be all about her, so this week she’s done her level best to provoke a reaction from me. She’s been spiteful verbally, short-tempered, bad-tempered, nasty, and yesterday after I woke up from a nap, she was horrible and I snapped and took the bait that had been laid out for me. When I asked what was wrong and why she was so angry it opened up the chance for her to tell me how selfish I am, how I’ve spent my entire life accusing her of things, that I’m a liar, evil, you name it, I am it. We all know how tough this chemo is, and I was just too tired emotionally and physically to be bothered. She’d waited until I was at the lowest low which came yesterday morning when I woke up to find almost all of my eyelashes have falled out, and then she went for it. In the end I told her she could fcuk off, can’t deal with the emotional blackmail and abuse, so she sulked for nearly 24 hours in the guestroom. No amount of effort on my part of James’ made any difference. All she did was give my son present after present after present, knowing that we try really hard not to spoil him.
Anyway, I’m rambling…I just haven’t had the energy to post on the thread because I didn’t want to bring everyone down with my seemingly constant moaning. On the up side, James cooked Christmas Lunch and it was excellent (especially compared to the test run which was not the best) and he’s really making an effort to support me.
Sorry this is a moan and that I haven’t asked after all of you individually. I want to echo what Pheebs said above: I hate that any of us have bc and have met in this way, but I am glad to know you all and to call you friends because I value each and every one of you so much. One for all, and all for one, and all that jazz!
Cat, you poor thing, its cr*p when we don’t have good relationships with those we should and even worse if its a parent (and a bleeding selfish one too boot if you ask me). You must be truly angry and devastated that she can only think of herself instead of her daughter. I suppose one could try and psycho-analyse her behaviour and say maybe its fear but at the end of the day it shouldn’t be up to you to try and work out why she is the way she is and sort her out - she needs to sort herself out and come back to you a supportive mum. Big hugs and love to you (((((((((((((0))))))))) xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Lorna, sorry to hear about your chemo being delayed, its a bummer because we try and plan life around this bleeding chemo and want to know an end date, I would be right fed up if it got delayed, even by only a week - I want to get to my last FEC and start looking forwards! Good news that you got the line delayed though so here’s hoping you have a glass or two (or 6) tonight and enjoy looking forward to a much better 2009!
Hope everything went ok for those other ladies partying yesterday and anyone else this week. Good luck to you Soo, don’t envy you all the travelling though.
My 4th FEC (how much better does it feel to get past the halfway mark?) went okay once they finally found a vein! When I arrived they had a bowl of hot water waiting for me to plunge my hands into to try and get my veins to play ball and had assigned me the kimo sister to find a vein. After 2 very painful stabs where the needle kept getting stuck and no amount of pushing would make my veins let it in she finally found a vein in my good arm so thankfully no chemo in my mx side this time! After that the kimo went in nice and quick and me and OH sat eating choccies and cakes that the kimo nurses had been given and were trying to get rid off!
Not feeling too bad today only thing is yesterday I noticed brown spots have appeared on my palms and soles of feet. They are very deep under the skin and range from one on a finger to about 5 on my thumb and from pin prick size to a couple of mm across. I also have a bruse on my spine at the top which wasn’t there before and I am sure I would know if I hit myself there. I mentioned the spots to the kimo sister (forgot the bruise) cos I hadn’t noticed them or they hadn’t been there when I saw the Onc on Monday who said she hadn’t seen them before but it could be a SE from the 5FU as it can cause skin discoloration but she had never seen it in spots before. That was that. So I am not truly sure whether I should be concerned or not or whether I am changing skin colour and might wake up black tomorrow.
Oh and my spikes of my own hair left from before are falling out fast so I am starting to look like a white (argh) fluffy 40 year old baby! My eye lashes are departing a bit too fast too Cat and even with mascara they look a bit straggly (as do my eyebrows without eye pencil). I did try putting some false eyelashes on but it looks like I have lid liner on so I will have to do a full eye makeup job to wear them which I can’t frankly be bothered with just to go to Morrisons!
Hope you all have a brilliant time tonight or a SE free day tonight and lets hope 2009 is a happy and healthy year for all of us, thanks so much for your friendship and support, xxx
Just to let you know FEC5 went surprisingly smoothly and it now feels so good to be on the home straight. My Onc has sent off for my radio planning appointment and has given me a script for Tamoxifen and told me to start taking it the day I start radio. It’s so good to be moving on mentally and I hope you will all get to the same place very soon.
Lorna - I’m so sorry you’ve got a delay - I know I’d be totally peeved if that happened to me. It’s all about the mental battle really, isn’t it?
Cat - I’m sorry your mother has been such a pain - good grief girl you really don’t need that abuse at the moment. When does she go? I bet you can’t wait to see the back of her!
As to the rest of you, I can only echo the sentiments of others - I also wish us all a much better 2009 - good health (most importantly), the back of kimo, getting our lives back and starting to enjoy ourselves and having fun.
Cat - special mention for you - sending hugs (((((((((((())))))))))) bet you can’t wait til she goes home, hope she doesn’t spoil tonight for you.
I would like to wish you all a Very Happy New Year, may it be better physically and emotionally and although it hasn’t been agreat 2008 (although some of it was good, just the last bit crap) it has brought me the friendship of all you lovely ladies. And although it would have been nice to meet under differant circumstances I don’t think it would mean as much. You have been a tower of strength, a lifeline and a bloody good laugh at the times I have needed it most, so thank you all.
Have a great evening and I shall raise a glass and toast you all tonight.
Hope your chemo goes ok tomorrow.