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Pat, haven’t had a normal bra on since November (hole in back makes it impossible still!), so I’m well in the know re: those ‘shelf’ support top thingies!

Glad to hear that the rads bit is so much easier though. Can’t wait to get this next op out of the way - I must be halfway now having got the mastectomy and chemo out of the way. Off to iron my jimjams in a mo., better have a try on and see if they still fit!

Nice to hear from the missing Somerset girlie. Bet you kept slopping your cider over the keyboard!!! Please, please, please, do not have that LD back reconstruction - this is the voice of experience!

And why was it when we had ‘normal’ hair it forever needed a trim, and now it’s taking forever to emerge. (Probably 'cos I’m checking it every 10 minutes eh?!)

Anyway, we all sound in good form. Love and hugs to you all. xx Jacq xx

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Hi Jacq,
I have it on good authority they can use my tummy for reconstruction- theres plenty of it as Thomas was nearly 10lbs when he was born-everything else shruck except that!
I’ll heed your words of advice on LD back reconstruction!
On the hair thing… mine used to be trimmed every 3 weeks as it was so short and now… it just wont grow fast enough!!! aarrgghhhhhhhhhhhhh!
hey ho, better go and see if i fancy any tea…
love
loulou xx

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Body clock all out of sync! Fell asleep this afternoon for 3 hours, so Mr. Sandman probably won’t be visiting me tonight.

Finished last chemo 3 weeks ago, and still feel like crap. Can’t walk far without wanting to collapse with aching legs and lack of breath.

Been on sofa for the last few hours and feet are throbbing. Just looked down and ankles have really puffed up - is that what yours are still like, Pat? Is this normal?

Have to go on rabbit food tomorrow, 'cos it aint just the feet that are puffed up. But what else is there to do except keep opening the fridge? Sick of reading, sick of watching tv, and sick of sitting.

Still not got date for op., they’re supposed to ring me this week - we’ll see … back throbbing … and, as you’ve probably sussed out by now, am totally peed off.

Where is everybody anyway?

Love from humpty Jacq. :frowning: xxx

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Hi ladies, how you all been? Humpty Jacq, lol! Yep, the achiness and breathlessness does hang on, I’m over 5 weeks post-last Tax and still ache like anything. It’s a deep muscle ache as well as joints, seeing onc on Fri and have a list a mile long of questions to ask - she’ll love me! I hope you get your op date soon, mine was the other way round but when you’ve a schedule of treatment and one finishes, you’re eager to get the next one out of the way. Still, you’ve got the chemo out of the way - fantastic feeling knowing that. I didn’t really get too excited on my last chemo, but when the 3rd Thursday came round I was ecstatic that I didn’t have to go for more! My ankles swelled big time, and now it’s on and off but still happens. I haven’t had sore feet or hands as such, just patches of soreness. My big toe on right foot throbs at times and fingers occasionally have funny pains. I guess it’ll all settle down eventually. Rads going fine, actually feel quite down and teary at the mo, not sure why. I spose it’s all part of the process but want to be back to feeling like ME again. I must be a late starter as anger seems to be setting in now too. Oh well, I’m sure it’ll pass. Hey Lou, glad you’re ok and good news re: recon. The velcro comment is so true, my dark and white fluff looks exactly like velcro! It’s taking forever to grow, altho OH says he can see a difference every day… Well, hope sun is shining wherever you lovely ladies are, how’s Lyn, Nicky and all? What will we all do when this rollercoaster ride is done? love and big hugs Pat x

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Sorry ladies but I’m about to rant. At the waste of time appt with the onc 2 weeks ago he said next appt in 6 weeks to consent to rads. The appt arrived today - for 2nd NOVEMBER! Couldn’t believe it. Phoned the hospital and had to hold for 20 minutes to get through to anyone. Needless to say I have managed to get it brought forward to the beginning of June. still not really happy as I had to cancel a course in March but onc said I would be fine to go one the next one at beginning of sept. That is starting to look doubtful now and I stand to lose 400 pounds. Rant over.
On a lighter note, my hair is growing quite quickly now (my Dad says look what it’s rooted in!) and so a friend bought me a hair brush with bobbles stored in the handle! That gave me a good laugh. Decided I can’t use the white ones though as they won’t show up in my grey hair!
I hope that evryone is ok.
Nicky x

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Hi Angel 1,

Thanks for your good wishes! All went well, ufff.

Fairly new to the forum, responded to your message by sending you a personal message so not sure if you check your inbox.

Have one more week before next chemo and started getting butterflies in my tummy…

Hope all is going well for you and if you would like to drop me a line it would be great.

Kasiax

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Hi there all

Just had 4th Tax, 2 days ago all went well. Very tired today but will be better tomorrow if its the same as last time. Taste has nearly gone so will be like that for the next 7 ish days, but its bearable and could be worse. Glad to hear your coping Kasia the next dose soon comes round before you know it you will be at the end. I ve got a scan on Monday for onc to decide wether to give me one or maybe two more Tax, crossing fingers its been doing its job.

hugs
Ange x

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Hello lovely ladies!
Been offline for a while-partly due to getting some work done last week and partly keeping myself manicly busy before last chemo so I didn’t dwell on it…however made it.
Thought I would be doing cartwheels down the ward on the way out but was so shattered having been there from 9.30 til 5pm(bloods borderline again!!), that it was all I could do to crawl out!
Rough night last night-worst yet, and still feeling s**t this morning, but steroids and anti-ems kicked in by lunchtime so feeling better now apart from sleepless again. OH on alart in case I decide to have a fainting spell again but so far so good! Got my fingers well and truly rapped at hospital for not getting checked at A&E after last incident with bathroom sink…something about platelets during chemo? But as I pointed out I am still here! Though I have to say that since the swelling went down I have been left with a ridge above my left eyebrow,which is a mere shadow of itself!
One good thing though, although I was getting physically sick feeling at the very thought of the cap, it appears to have worked as my hair has stayed put apart from a bit thinner on top, and most folks have said they wouldn’t have noticed…roll on December til I can get my colour done again…30 years of being blonde and I can’t get used to being mousey!! Glad to hear that you are all getting some growth now!
Just got to wait now for app with cons onc then referral for rads, but been told that will likely get started by middle of June so am going to enjoy the respite once the SEs of this one are over.
Anyway ladies off to try and get some zzzzds-can’t do bedhopping now as eldest daughter home but it is nice having her around!
Love and mega hugz to all,
Lyn xxx

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Chemo brain has well and truly taken over! I went out with a friend last night and after a lengthy discussion about puds and drinks i went and ordeed at the bar. The look on my friends face when I put her coffee down in front of her was a picture but I really couldn’t work out what I’d done wrong until she said “funny looking orange juice”. At least I got her pud right!
My taste has eventually returned - until next chemo on Wednesday.It seems such a minor thing but I’d sasy that I’ve found that the worst SE. I guess it shows that I’ve got away quite lightly compared with the rest of you.
Have a good weekend all. had thunder storms and it’s currently heavy rain here. Don’t think we’ll be siting out a lot this weekend.
Nicky x

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Hi all!
Sleepless in Scotland again! On the plus side the steroids definitely give a lift but useless for getting any sleep!! aaarrgghh
How many still to go Nicky? I finally got my high tonight at finishing so celebrated with a cava! Really enjoyed it and no ill effects!
Jacqui, hope you are feeling better-any news on your op? The waiting is a real bummer!
How are the rads going Pat? Any SE with them?
Have decided that we can’t afford having older daughter at home…after the incident with the fish tank, my supposedly intelligent daughter tonight, being very helpful, would put on the rice to steam in the microwave, in my brand new Pampered Chef steamer, EXCEPT she forgot to put in water…and burned the a*** out of it…what hope have I got with chemo brain???
On that note…
Off to try and get some sleep,
hugz,
Lyn xx

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Hi ladies, how’s everyone doing? Good, I hope. Lyn sorry you’re not sleeping again, it’s a pain but at least it doesn’t last too long. The rads are going okay - went to diff hospital yesterday as had to see onc as well. Was at hosp from 10.20 and left at nearly 3pm! Waited almost 2 hrs to see onc for all of 2 mins! Ah well, she says all is going well, skin is holding up quite well, must be the buckets of aqueous cream I’m slapping on. Tiredness seems to be kickking in a bit now but, apart from that I feel okay, bit weepy lately. Will start tamoxifen tomorrow - I’ve been invited to an on old schoolfriend’s 50th , we all hit the big 5 0 this year, so looking fwd to that. Don’t want any SE to interfere. Lyn, poor steamer, poor intelligent daughter! What are they like - they want to help but… 6 wks post-chemo and chemo brain still alive and kicking, in soooo many ways!!! Hope you got some sleep. How’s Lou, Jacq, Nicky and all? Sun shining so wiil nip to shops before rain starts again. love to all, Pat x

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Seems to be a regular feature for me just now…birds starting to sing outside and still wide awake! Think it will have to be a sleeping tablet tonight?
Have been a bit wary since having the faint last time as i had taken one then and don’t know whether it contributed.
Don’t know about lovely weather Pat, we have had howling gales and rain for the last 2 days but hopefully a bit more settled today-a walk might help turn the old brain off! Isn’t it frustrating when you wait for hours for apps then you are in and out in minutes? But glad to hear you are coping well with rads-I was told too that tiredness would be the main SE with them.
Apart from sleeplessness, the only thing bothering me as usual is down below, which has ceased up completely, despite meds and taking linseeds which I was assured would work…HA! Semtex again I think!
I suppose I could go and do some ironing, which is threatening to meet me at the door…but then again…??
Cup of tea and my book is preferable!
Hope all other ladies well…Nicky, Lou, Jacqui?
Hugz,
Lyn xx

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Hello all,this seems like a friendly thread,can I join you ?
I finished chemo and rads last June and still having sleepless nights even after taking pills to help,I am really getting fed up as im tired all day.
I would be nice to have a friend in the same boat if there are any,
Perhaps more excercise would help but my joints and muscles get very painful suppose thats the Arimidex.
I had grd 2 bc, no node involvement,WLE,thrombosis and seroma,I get anxious of it returning without me knowing as this one was detected following my very 1st mammo I had no lump to feel so how lucky was I!!
Sorry to go on but thanks all for listening
Take care all
Jackie x

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Hi Ladies, Oh Lyn, where did the sun go!!! Bucketing down here on and off since early morning. Have we had our summer already?! Welcome Jackie, lovely to have a new lady on here, all are welcome. Lou (tillie) started this thread a few months ago and I’ve found it so comforting, funny, informative and everything else! The ladies on here are great and if you need to have a rant, rant away! Know what you mean about constant worrying but it’s just something we have to try and deal with, not easy. Lyn, have you tried movicol, it was the only thing that worked for me. Well, went to schoolfriend’s 50th party last night and it was lovely. It was also a party for her Dad so most of the people there were 65 plus. The dj was about 65!!! and played a good mix of new and old - and the more mature couples got up and did the waltzes etc, it was lovely to watch. Very nice to get back ‘out there’ again. Hope all are ok, despite lousy weather. Speak soon, love and hugs Pat x

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Hello all! Welcome Jackie - great name! Sun’s out now!

Yep, got my op sorted for lymph nodes’ ousting - 2 weeks time - 1st June.

Got my worry hat on … wasn’t nervous about mastectomy last year, but am this time. Didn’t know what was in front of me last time did I? Thought I was just having a mastectomy, an ‘easy’ recon., and that was it - no thought of back complication, chemo., further op., rads., and drugs.

Just hope the top doc has his cancer magnet at hand when he goes in this time!

Crash diet for the next 2 weeks - if I keep saying it, it just might sink in that it’s what needs to happen!

Gawd, I hope I have nice people either side of me when I’m on the ward this time - I pray I get somebody with a sense of humour and not a moron. Jeez, as if that’s all I’ve got to worry about!

My girls and I have just visited my dear old mum in her nursing home out in the sticks, and my 8 month old granddaughter met her great gran for the first time.

First time she’s never screamed her head off with a ‘stranger’, we even put her on my mum’s lap. She was fascinated with my mum, and kept putting her hand on my mum’s arm - it was so sweet - 'cos my mum has really bad dementia and doesn’t even know me anymore, but amazingly kept trying to make noises to the baby.

Sod it, that’s started me off again. Pat, where do all these tears keep coming from? So emotional lately, it’s driving me mad. Watched Titanic for the upteenth time yesterday, and stil wept out loud for the last hour - ridiculous!

Lyn, 6-12 fat, dried apricots with a hot drink - enough said - the eagles will land! And opt for the book and creased clothes any time.

Love to all, xx Jacq xx

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Hi ladies, and welcome to Jackie-yes is is a friendly thread and like Pat I have found it so much comfort over the last few months, regardless of what mood you are in!
Thanks for the tips girls-Pat have tried movicol, but got with it I couldn’t swallow it for gagging so will try the apricots again.
Still sleepless and that was with a sleeping tablet! Poor oh suffering as well as I can’t bedhop now so he was away to golf today absolutely shattered, and in bed by 8.30-wimp!!
Off to see doc today as I have developed a discolouration in the area of the WLE and SNB, and don’t know what is causing it-hopefully something and nothing, but don’t you find that when something like that happens your mind starts playing silly games again?
Anyway, back to bed for a while, and hope for some shuteye!
Hugz,
Lyn xx

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Hi all, especially Jackie.
Lyn,it must feel great to finish chemo. I start cycle 7 on Wednesday. 2 cycles/4 doses to go. Last dose should be 5 weeks on wednesday. It seemed like such a long time in December and now the end is so close. Hope that the eagles have landed. I was offered chocolate flavoured movicol by my GP. Even as a chocoholic that didn’t appeal. Too late to tell you but at chemo they changed ondansetron for granisetron and I had far fewer problems. Hope that you have managed to get some more shut eye.
A friend has promised that when all treatment(including rads) is finished she will treat me to a meal out any where of my choice. Dangerous promise! Have decided to try out a new restaurant in the village so that we can both drink as I will splash out on some bubbly.
Jacq incase I forget to say it nearer the time, fingers crossed for your next op.
The weather has been terrible here too. Spent the weekend in the caravan but it wasn’t really ideal weather.
Take care all.
Nicky x

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Hi ladies, how’s everyone? Weather’s rotten, blowing a gale this morning when I went to hospital, how wig stayed put, I do not know! Clutched at it a couple of times but, when I’d been shopping I didn’t have a free hand so stuck sunglasses over wig and prayed!!! After rads appt which was really early, went to office and did a bit of data input for a while, just to get my hand back in there. Was sposed to have been referred to occy health 2 wks ago, but it hasn’t been done yet - urghhh! I’ve got 4 weeks to go on my sick cert and sick pay will run out then too so really wanted to get an appt sorted, told manager and she’s said she’ll sort it. Think I’ll only do a few hours at first but I think it’s time.
Jacq, glad you have your op date, it’ll be here in no time and then you’ll be back home recovering. Where are you having op and are you staying in overnight?How’s the back? Don’t get me started on crying, when I read your post (re: your mum) I had tears in my eyes! I’ve only just started on the tamoxifen so, once that kicks in I reckon I’ll be a gibbering wreck and the men in white coats will come and take me away… :frowning: Seriously, I think that as I’m coming towards the end of active treatment, and maybe relaxing a little bit more, it’s just all a bit overwhelming. Also, on the forums there has been a lot of bad news lately which is upsetting for everyone. I’ve warned my colleagues that when I return to work I’ll either be a) stripping off including wig when I get the many hot flushes I get throughout the day or b) blubbing at the drop of a hat and at the most inappropriate of times. They won’t let me near any patients I’m sure!
Nicky, the chocolate flavour movicol sounds gross. Lyn, I hope the apricots worked.
Jackie, is the arimidex similar to tamoxifen? I’m not really ‘up’ on all these different drugs they give us after treatment.
Hope all are doing well, will check in later love and hugs Pat x

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Afternoon all, so good to see all the supportive posts, Lou started a great thread here!
I can understand why you’d want things to go well on your next admission Jacq, you deserve it to go well!
Useful for hear how you are doing with rads Pat, I’m waiting for a start date but the waiting list is 8-10 weeks here in Brighton! I wonder if your hormones are playing havoc with your emotions? I’ve had a few weepy spells but nothing that doesn’t settle.
Had a crap week last week (week 1 after final Tax), felt really wiped out and spiked temp on Wed so spent 3 hours in A & E before getting to bed at 2 am as bloods were low but ok only to repeat the whole affair on thursday night when WCC had crashed so in I stayed! Had hideous 18 hours on the Assessment ward, hell on earth then thankfully transferred to a Oncology ward side room and everything!
May have been an infection in my wisdom tooth that set it off, but temp has settled and after 3 days of IV antibiotics I made a bid for freedom this morning. Can’t believe I miss my PICC line but I have more needles in the past 4 days than in the whole of chemo! Left arm feel like a pincushion!
Consultant said I was the first one to develop neutropenic sepsis since they started using GCSF routinely for all breast patients, just my luck!
So moral of that tale is get ANY dental problems sorted before chemo!
Really glad to be back at home and feeling better,
hope all having treatment this week get on ok
Gill x

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Gill, how rotten for you! I only visited a&e once, and that really was enough. Glad it’s all settled down now, and your tax is over. 8-10 weeks is a long time, but once you get started it’ll go really quick. All the best, Pat x