@Jess_ sorry to hear about your father and I hope he recovers soon ?. It’s a difficult journey, isn’t it? I have help from my close family and access to an amazing medical team and facilities (thanks NHS:heart:) However, when I’m down, when I have doubts and questions and whenever I feel anxious, the support I receive from my pink sisters is the most important - here in this forum, other forums, my Maggies’ support group and all the lovely ladies I’ve been meeting along this journey. It’s like I discovered a lovely secret power group of women who really understands each other and are always willing to help. It’s definitely one positive thing I take from this journey - There are 2 pieces of advice (given to me right in the beginning) that I always follow: one is to always let my medical team know if I have any side effects and or struggles (physical and emotional) and take the medication as prescribed (even without symptoms), the second is to manage energy levels using the spoons of energy method (give priority to exercise/movement daily, for other tasks know your energy is finite and learn to stop). If you are struggling inform your team or GP. Try a support group in your area, or a Maggie’s or Macmillian’s centre near you and exercise/move daily for 1 hour. Try meditation, breathing- there are several apps available - I use Headspace. Don’t count on sunshine ? (if you are in the UK) and prioritise yourself - all the best 
Thank you for the links @Geo23. Sorry to hear about your struggles and I hope you can find some good tips in the forum. Keep shining 
Thank you @rachel60 for your recommendation. Not being able to cold cap is a bummer…but I love your attitude ?. I’m only washing my hair the day after the cold cap/infusion - so 1 wash every 2 weeks…?
@Guida aren’t we all doing amazingly given how difficult this is.
I do wash twice a week which Paxman website (which I found really useful) says it is the maximum. i was the day after and the day before but I’m on a weekly dose at the moment.
But I think as long as it doesn’t get all tangled its fine to do what feels best.
more power to you! X
Hi rachel60
I’m too losing my hair on the crown & on one side at the back. Doing cold cap too. Had hair cut shorter, hoping it will help with the cold cap. Losing my hair is my biggest fear. Call me vain, but that’s how i feel.
Good luck, keep posted.
XX
@janeymay60 Your attitude is fantastic ‘take each step at a time’ and if I remember well you say to do this journey as a job. That’s how I’m trying to deal with it. I really believe that some hair loss will be part of this journey with chemotherapy, some may loose some and some may loose it all, it’s something that we have to deal with.
@rachel60 allergies suck, I have quite a few already and am more likely to have issues. Luckily your team have adjusted your medication to mitigate any further problems. They are a clear lot! Added to shopping list :epsom salts.
@Guida @Great advice
@Jess_ Sorry to hear you have struggled. It’s OK to vent. We’re hear for you. Hope you Dad is better soon.
@kar3n I too cut my hair shorter 10 days ago, my chemotherapy was delayed and surgery done Wednesday, but I know chemo is down the link in a few weeks and I will experience some hair loss. I felt that I had taken some control.
@kar3n I totally get you. Its not vain at all. The way I’ve explained it to people who have said I’ll look great bald, in a wild wig or it will grow back (!) is that this is a big visible sign of what we are going through and the shock our bodies are putting up with. Its attacking our identity. I also try to remember that its also attacking those cancer cells too so lets hope they are really hurting!
this article is perhaps worth reading
apple.news/AjMAGyM4VTZqHPHcQH96NvQ
ps I won’t look great bald. Probably like a half roasted King Edward ?
rachel60 Love your attitude. Really scared now to wash hair. Got it done at hairdressers last Saturday. Only got to rub head & hair is on my fingers !!
Thanks for your response.
xx
@kar3n make sure the cap is the correct size. If hair is falling on crown and back it could be that it’s too small. Check if the inner cap touches all the scalp. I use a medium inner cap and a small outer cap and I also add a swimming cap on top. I got this tip from the facebook Paxman group.
Hi Guida
Thankyou. The nurse did have problems fitting it, tried a small, then a medium, didn’t think it felt right, also another patient had the same problem, our hair wasn’t wet afterwards, where as, on my first session it was soaking. Will make sure on next session.
xx
@Jess_ hope your father is doing better. I’ve been losing my hair the last couple of days, but yesterday when I washed it I felt like half of it came away. It’s so distressing!
I have my next EC treatment this morning and I’m feeling really nervous and upset as I was really ill with it last time. Fingers crossed I can get stronger anti sickness medication and then I may feel a bit better! Please send good vibes for the next four days ?
@Cali thinking of you today and sending good vibes in your direction. Another tick 
in your treatment ?. Drink plenty of water ?
Hi Cali
i do hope your treatment isn’t as bad as you think, and you sort the sickness out. So far that’s not something I’ve had, but who knows what might come. I’m just going to start the second cycle of three lots of Paxitacel, and my hair is definitely starting to come out now. I had it cut very short a couple of weeks ago, but all the same felt a real sadness when I saw lots on my pillow this morning.I’ve just ordered some scarves and hair caps- not sure I want to go down the wig route, but I might change my mind.
I really admire everyone on this thread- you’re all going through so much, and the positivity is wonderful. Inevitably there will be down days, and I’ve been feeling very fragile and anxious about what might come over the next months, but reading all your supportive words definitely helps. Bigs hugs to all of you - we can do hard things!
???
good vibes Cali ???each cycle can be different so keep drinking the water and if you antisickness meds don’t work ring your team they will tweak again if needed ??Shi xx
Totally freaked out. Hospital have just called to say I’m due chemotherapy this wed! Very confused as my oncologist definitely said she would request to delay it for a week to 19th and as I left the hospital my breast oncology team appointment was changed from 12th July to 2nd August so I presumed that was my chemo start date!!! Turns out that was a clinic appointment (breast care nurse has just said). So I’ve never received an appointment for chemotherapy. I told her I wasn’t mentally or physically ready to start chemo this wed. (Rash hasn’t completely cleared). She said she’ll request to start on wed 19th but needs to confirm with doctors and will call me back tomorrow. She said will request doctor to look at my rash again this week and get my bloods done again. Feeling very confused but scared and know I don’t feel ready to start this Wed.
Plus all my family are going to Spain from August 6th and I’m relying on my friends snd you pink ladies for support. .
@Beeza66 So sorry to hear this uncertainty. Its exactly what you don’t need!
I had a similar experience when I started. I had my oncologist appointment moved forward because she had a free slot and she said my first chemo would be in a few days. I said I’m not ready and she very gently said yes you are.
i think looking back I was never going to feel ready but I started and in so many ways it felt so much better because I then knew what it was all like. The nurses were so kind, nothing too much trouble. Can you take someone with you? That really helped me.
i don’t know whether any of that helps. And it does sound like you are still needing a firm date. The only thing I can say is certainty of knowing what chemo is like has removed alot of anxiety.
we’re here for you - great thing about this group is supporting each other with the ups, downs and sideways.
hugs
xxx
Dear @rachel60
Thank you for the guardian article link you shared. I’ve just read it. Like she did I’m dreading losing my hair and see it as my “crowning glory.” As I’ve grown older my hair is still thick and long, straight but slightly wavy and fair (not yet grey) and I’ve got visions of growing back scrawny thin, grey curly hair.
As women, of course, we place a lot of importance on our hair - just look at all the salons around - and yes it is very much part of our femininity and personality. Men will never “get” it.
She’s right though - to survive this is first and foremost and it’s sometimes hard to remember that when we look so distastefully “different” in the mirror.
I’ve already got a wig ready and I’m getting my hair cut shorter and in a style like my wig tomorrow. I know this will be traumatic but my real friends will stay by me whatever I look like.
Hi @Guida and @Artylady @I like your words of encouragement. You’re right, this group of fantastic women is a lifeline. It’s surreal we can’t see each other’s faces or message each other personally outside the group, but I find sharing this and encouraging each other has become an important part of getting through the rubbish.
@Cali how did it go? How are you? I’m rooting for you xx
Sending love to all. X
Hi all - found out my chemotherapy will start on Wed 19th July and I’m petrified.
Hi @Beeza66 it’s normal to feel scared. I felt the same. I also suffered from anxiety and felt quite lonely - still do some days. Speak to your team and your GP if you need. There is help available so please ask. “This treatment is important and it will kill any cancer cells” - try to focus on that. It’s good that you are starting it and the sooner the better . I hope the rash has gone and the cording on your arm has improved. EC is your red angel ? and you can do this. I was told that there is a shortage of staff for this Friday and my treatment may need to be postponed ?. I feel really down today…