@wjs exactly the same with me, dry cheeks.
I am having the last one on Monday 
For some reason a corner of my mind is thinking that they may say - āoh lets give you a couple more cycles of chemotherapyā 
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@pat haha I know what you mean. I canāt quite believe itās nearly done. Itās only because Radiotherapy is busy planning my next treatment. Got my CT scan Monday for that so itās all moving forward for the next stage. Good luck for Monday, hope the final side effects arenāt too bad.x
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@charlie22 so sorry about your Dad. Thatās incredibly crap and unnerving. Hang on in there x
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Thanks Charley Iāve just applied aswell 
little boost x
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@wjs @nicd congratulations on finishing. Take care of yourselves itās an odd time. Wishing you a speedy bounce back x
@wjs they reduced me to 80% and most definitely it made a difference. The nurse assured me that it would be as effective. I feel happier that Iāll get to the end now. I wouldnāt have if it had stayed at 100%. Iām just hoping that I donāt have an allergic reaction with the final one. My friend had a reaction yesterday and it sounded scary. X
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@wjs I see the surgeon on Wednesday. Iām not sure if heāll give me a date then for the surgery or quite what to expect. Certainly it doesnāt look as if thereās going to be any lolling about with nothing happening 
@pat good luck on Wednesday. Hopefully youāll get a date and you can then focus on getting the next stage done. My radiotherapy is likely to be beginning of Nov.x
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@pat the physical bits yes as I had my lumpectomy first. Will just be whatever medication I have to go onto.x
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@wjs Thatās good. I had the chemo first so feel I still have a long way to go. They told me a whole regime of tablets and 6 monthly drips and things lasting up to 10 years 
. I have entirely wiped it all from my mind at the moment.
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@nicd congratulations for getting over this hurdle - I hope the next steps are kinder than what youāve managed to conquer so far.
@alig1961 eyeliner I think is the way ahead! I bought false eyelashes but I still have a few of my own left and have been practicing eyeliner 
. Great to hear you have 2 days in London booked - how lovely to spend quality time with your daughter 
I know itās not a holiday but a change of scenery will be lovely. Pleased to hear this round is more manageable than previously.
@charley thanks for the link.
I had time with my son and family Friday night - the little one is 13 months old and gorgeous - they live a few hours away so that time is so precious . Also in my last week of chemo - call with onc tomorrow, bloods Tuesday and number 6 Thursday. Felt really good this last week and be great to get this final one done! @donna_51 I like how you described how you start to heal as your hair doesā¦ that makes sense even when there is other treatments to go this rubbish feels like a big deal.
Enjoy your Sunday all - must get to watch a few more movies - doing yet another jigsaw!
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Iām very grumpy today. Hubby was due to go to see Man United today so I was looking forward to a nice afternoon alone. Iād planned my telly programmes and the snacks are in the cupboard. Heās decided he isnāt well enough to go, he has had a VERY nasty cold, so thatās fair enough, and heās worried that if he goes it will set him back for looking after me after chemo 
So, my daughter is going, as usual, with her partner which means we are having our grandaughter. Not quite the Sunday I was anticipating. I feel guilty as she is adorable and no trouble but I find that nowadays I just canāt be bothered with anything I know when she arrives it will be absolutely fine, and I could have said no but then I would feel even more guilty. God Iām bonkers.
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Hi All
I hope you are having a restful Sunday.
I just wanted to message as Iām fibding it really tough at the moment. Ive 3 more weekly pax and I am really struggling to bounce back now.
Im just feeling more & more exhausted / rubbish after each weekā¦
Ive a (newly turned) 11yo and 9yo - im trying to be a ānormalā mummy but im failing massively.
I know its not forever and hopefully ill feel better as i move out of the chemo phase but at the moment i just feel so bad for my kidsā¦
Anyway noone can help really - just need to keep going & get through the next 3 weeks
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Hi @bettyb24
Well done you for doing a great job so far ā¦ā¦ it must be so difficult with young ones at home. You are not failing - youāre tired. Be kind to yourself. . It sounds easier than it really is sometimes.
I just have my husband and myself and thinking about other members in your household must be super hard. I canāt offer words of wisdom but there are others on here that are probably better placed to. All I will say is that children are far more resilient than you think (mine little angel is grown up now!!).
Remember youāre a good mumā¦. sending hugs to you to get through this as easily and quickly as possible xx
@pat the afternoon wasnāt what you planned - hope you got through it ok - my hubby had the footie on most of the afternoon- I planned to be in the garden but it was too cold - so jigsaw and footie it was
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@bettyb24
Iām so glad youāve poured your heart out on here. I hope itās made you feel a bit better. I know when Iām having a bad time and Iāve used this forum the ladies havenāt let me down.
I have one daughter who is 15 and i feel that Iāve ruined 2024 for her. I know there is nothing I can do about it and I know she knows that, but when youāre exhausted you donāt think straight and you can feel so guilty. If you werenāt such a fab mum those thoughts wouldnāt exist. Your kids will bounce back, like all of ours. All of our children want us well so we can make lots of happy memories when we get through this. You will be normal mummy again. Try and be kind to yourself because what you are feeling is normal but if you dwell on it, it could pull you down more. The counsellor Iām chatting with says that cancer brings with it a lot of grief around loss, loss of identity, loss of connections, loss of opportunitiesā¦ā¦ā¦we are exhausted at this stage but weāre heading in the right direction. Be strong, you have got this. Maybe consider the McMillan counselling sessions if you havenāt already.
Big big hugs lovely. Xxx
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Hi @bettyb24
Iām sorry youāre having such a tough time at the moment. I also have 3 paclitaxels left and a 8 year old and 6 year old at home. It is hard. Really hard. But youāve got this. Youāre so close to the end of chemo. Youāre not failing at anything - your kids are loved and thatās the most important thing in the world. I know the guilt and the worry can be overwhelming, but children are so resilient and Iām sure they will be so proud of you and how fabulous youāre doing.
Thinking of you and sending you strength, positivity and a virtual hug xx
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@bettyb24 Iām sorry to hear you are struggling at the moment.
I think most of have at some point or another, with guilt, despair and hopelessness featuring large at some points.
@alig1961 @rrey I canāt add anything to your wonderful posts 
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@collywobbles - it was actually fine, of course. Granddaughter was adorable of course and she had a nice long nap this afternoon Hubby was quite pleased he didnāt go to the match as they lost, got someone sent off and played rubbish! So whatās new?
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@charley22 Iāve been thinking of you. Hope youāre ok 
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