May i ask the ladies on here. Did u have to wait a week for the path report to see if ir nodes were clear post surgery? I was told by the surgeon in the revovery room that all nodes clear. They told me before surgery i would know that day before they discharged me. Xx
I have just had a lumpectomy after being diagnosed on May 22. I wasnt one of the people who got cancer and like everyone else thought it couldn t happen to me. Li ke you I hated telling people and felt very angry and distressed. I exercise, eat well and a.m slim and there is no family history. It felt like I’d failed somehow and could have avoided it if I just knew what had gone wrong otherwise I could get it again.
Friends said encouraging things but I felt like saying you wouldn’t be so cheerful if it were you. The sorrow and shock of suddenly being pushed brutally into the world of a cancer patient is horrendous. It is so isolating and friends and family can only understand so far. I’m still coming to terms with it and now think of my breasts as unexploded bombs. I can t stand the idea of people pitying me so put on a cheerful face, so much so that friends say I’m brave. have no choice. This is not something I can hide from. But inside I’m in meltdown and feeling desperately alone.
The surgery was t as bad as I feared and not that painful but I’m now waiting for the results of the test results …the worst is the waiting and fearing the worst. It did get better when I got more information but I still need a treatment plan.
Let me know how you get on. Like you I have a teenager doing exams though my parents are dead so I’m glad at least I don’t t have to tell them.
Just had a Sainsburys meltdown,how am I supposed to decide what to cook for tea amidst all this?Doesnt seem fair, should have been be allocated chef, personal shopper and house keeper on diagnosis rather than given form for free prescriptions…
I had a spectacular meltdown in Sainsbury’s shortly after my dx over some chocolate biscuits!! I had a desperate urge for a certain brand but the woman in front of me took the last pack Disaster and I started to snivel. A kindly shop assistant, who clearly thought she had a mad woman in the shop, went in the back and found me a packet! To cap it all, when I left the shop I couldn’t remember where I’d parked and had another snivel, lol. Suddenly spotted it out of the corner of my eye and literally ran over, locked myself in and had an even bigger snivel! All seems rather funny now but at the time it just seemed too much, on top of everything else. OH was nonplussed at his normally sensible wife behaving like that over a chocolate biscuit, can’t blame him really! Now when I’ m having a bad day, i tell him I’m having a ‘booby’ day and to ignore anything stupid I say or do. It seems to work quite well, lol. Sending you virtual hugs. X Francine
Thanks Francine and Jill for sharing that. I had a low Friday night. I too have been having tearful moments too. Love your phrase that ur having a booby day if you feel its all getting too much. Think i might use the same phrase! Xxx
Yes, I have a snoring husband too!Hence posts at 5 am this morning also due to dreading appt with surgeon today.Hope your appt not too horrible.Jill.
Thanks Sazza for the tip for extra bin bags! I havent reveived any emails/calls. I think I would just be direct too with a sense of dark humour. I would say to a cold caller. Hey look im really sorry but i’m going to have to terminate this call. The Grim Reaper is knocking at my door!!! Goodbye. I would do love to say that to an insensitive cold caller. Hugs Dee xxx
A friend of mine had macmillians call round a few weeks ago, told her about the pack you can get for symptoms etc to look out for. She explained about my diagnosis and said yeah great, the told her it was ‘free’ then asked if she’d like to donate- yes she did I’ll just go get my purse- to which he explained it would have to be a direct debit of min £5.00 as they didn’t do lower! - she explained her finances didn’t allow it but would happily put some money in a box - needless to say this dude wasn’t happy at all!
As much as I’m grateful for macmillians and did speak to them on first diagnosis I must admit I was quite shocked and upset to receive an email about gifting them in my will, call me over sensitive but I thought that was a step too far! - and should my time come I’m sure the mortgage company will beat anyone to the post so don’t expect much left! X
I have 2 different email accounts to avoid this. One account is for personal correspondence and the other one I use if I sign up with anything. There are a lot of companies out there that always ask for your email address before you can access the site and they sell your email address on. I’m sure compare the supermarket is one of those sites because I used my second address to get a quote for a family member’s car insurance and I then got emails addressed to him in the subject header. The second email address is always full of spam; my first address is not. x
Insensitive is right Sazza. We’ve all got plenty of life left in us and thats worth remebering when u hit the bad days or moments. I give monthly to the Royal Marsden as thats where i’m being treated. As u enter they have a wall of cells for each day of the year and you can sponsor a day for yourself or a loved one and they write your name up. I sponsored 11th March the day of my op and the day that hospital saved my life. My mother was also treated there so her birthday is up. Its such a great way to donate and my mother would have loved it. Xxxx Wish all hospitals could be like it!!
Hi Heather
Sorry to hear about your hair. Even though you were expecting it I’m sure it was a bit of a shock. Clearly it has brought out a hidden talent in your husband! Don’t supose he’ll be giving up the day job any day soon! I’m still waiting for Kettering to organise my follow up endoscopies, 6 weeks down the line. My BC surgeon is fed up and has been on to them to tell them to hurry up. Will be another 3 weeks or so before the BRCA test results arrive. I had one counselling session but decided it wasn’t for me. There was a lot of counsellor ‘speak’ and she’d clearly gone thro it many times before. I’m sure some people would find it helpful but it just doesn’t do it for me. We had a nice afternoon in one of the Osprey hydes at Lyndon yesterday, watching them coming and going on the nest. We need a better pair of binoculars I think. There were some very keen ‘twitchers’ there who seem to know the identity of every bird out there! Anyway, hoping that your chemo doesn’t go too badly. I’m strongly considering not having any more surgery at the moment, as I don’t feel either physically or emotionally up to it. Will discuss it with the surgeon when the BRCA test is back. Sending virtual hugs to everyone going thro treatment. Xx Francine
Heart goes out to you Bernie. I’m halfway through rads. Chemo can be tough going. Sending you a massive group hug Bernie xxxx
Hello Ladies, I am a 40 year old who was diagnosed with stage 3 ductal invasive breast cancer. Still can’t really believe it to be honest. I had more biopsys done from a smaller lump (which I didn’t know was there) they also took some more lympth node biopsys. They said this would need surgery first. Any idea how long I will have to wait?? Thank you 
Thank you.
MadAnge. So sorry to hear ur news. You are similar age to me. I waited about a month for surgery. Hope this helps and this forum is brilliant so do post anytime you want advice, help or just simply a hug. Dee xxxx
To all those recently diagnosed (Jill1998, Madange and everybody else) so sorry to hear your stories.
I was diagnosed in Feb and felt the same, how was I going to deal with it, how will I tell people, how will I cope…so many emotions to process and no idea how to do it.
I didn’t even tell many people I had gone for the biopsy so when I was told it was grade2 IDC and not a fibroid my immediate concern was for my family and friends and how they would take the news. I’m naturally quite pragmatic so went into robot mode for a week or so just reeling off the facts as I knew them until they gave me my final treatment plan. I think it was about a month between diagnosis and my first surgery.
My advice is do what makes you feel comfortable, this is your body so take your time getting coming to terms with and your head around and understanding each step of your dianosis and treatment as and when it occurs. You’re breast care nurse can also give you excellent reading material for when you are ready (I didn’t do this at first and regretted it later) as there is actually quite a lot of information available, I just wasn’t ready to read it at first as it made it more real for me.
This forum is exellent for practical advice so use it as often as you can, I wish I had signed up earlier!!
I hope you all manage to keep your spirits up as much as possible and find something to laugh at daily, sounds like you have amazing support so I’m sure that will make this whole nightmare much easier to bare.
Stacey xx
Morning all,
Wiffle sad u dont gell with your BC Nurse i found this too she wasn’t that empathetic. Asked to be changed to another nurse as these are your first port of call if u have probs later on after u finish treatment. The helpline on here is invaluable when u have that situation. I was lucky as my surgeons and consultants are fab so dont really need the nurse and now i have been moved to the young womans deadicated breast nurse and she is brilliant. Really important you get this sorted out. I was lucky my anasethesist and surgeon and day surgery nurses were brilluant as I had a phobia of surgery. My old BC nurse wasn’t sympathetic at all and this didnt help. Without my fab aurgical team could not have done it. They cured me of my phobia too!
Jill good luck with ur surgery too Thursday will be thinking of you and let us all know how u get on. Dee xxxxx
Hi Jill1998 it was a nickname for me at school. I was one of the Mad ones I have calmed over the years though!! I guess in a way this stuff is making mad but in a different way xx
Hi Abby63
Welcome to the BCC Forum.
Your post from 14/06/15 at 9.39am has now gone live on the forum following your user name change.
I’m sure you will find lots of information and support here from fellow members.
Very best wishes
Janet
BCC Moderator
Different mad!At least it’s a change!