Zena, I remember you were having an MR. Are those the results that you have just received? I’m here if you need to talk xx
Yes jo , I spoke to her at this morning and she told me about more nodes and big tumour - no plan yet need ct scan needed but I’m so angry at the wait jo my kids are so little and I’m so scared of leaving them. Xxxx
Zena, Moijan’s words are very wise and she has put things in a very clear way. We all naturally think the worst so that we are prepared. Things will hopefully fall into place once you get your treatment plan but the waiting and uncertainty are what causes anxiety.
I am still waiting too and feel frustrated and angry at times but in the grand scheme of things, the wait probably isn’t that long it just seems it to us. It means that you have time to be thoroughly investigated and so your treatment plan will be the BEST for you. I know that’s a small constellation for how your feeling right now. Oddly, waiting does give you time to adjust too.
Stick with it, keep ranting and chatting on here. You are certainly not going anywhere yet so try and focus on now rather than the what ifs of the future. You haven’t been told anything to suggest that you’re not going to be treated with curative intent you just haven’t been given any positive information yet.
Treatment is better than it ever has been and there is lots of promising new research in the pipeline. Keep going Hun. xx
Moijan and Jo
Both your Messages have given me hope back and stopped my uncontrollable crying .
I have Just had a call for a ct scan today at 5 and a bone scan Monday at 12 … so my waling on the phone to bcn must have got here moving- she said ;your back on my radar - I did wonder why I had dropped off it …? but at least I’m back on. I did say I would takemy kids in and they could explain to them why I had been left so long between diagnosis and T plan …
moijan your story is the one I cling into at times like this but I do know you are rare …,but it has inspired me and your positive understanding words … I just hope I get to do the same for other ladies down the line . How are you doing at the moment and any news on you ? Xxxxx
massive thank you for your messages girls xx
Aw Thank you Helena, you are truly a gift to us on here x I’m really really bad today- it was so hard when she told me this morning to hear worse news ,I could have scremed down the phone . I went into this howling thing for an hour ( worried my neighbours would call police ) I was so loud … all I could think of was the end …
The X-ray just called and said about my 3 scans - and my v pillow was just delivered and the man was like " errr you ok " I said yes just a bit ill ( understatement of my life ) but had to come out of that dark place …
I praying for got ct and bones as just a few more years would mean the world to me .
I know we are all in this place and sometimes it’s so hard but thank you for being there I couldn’t do it without you ladies actually xxxx
Good ct scan .not got … and only 2 scans . I’m not the best touch typer ( as you’ve probably noticed) xx
Zena … so sorry to hear your news but my lump was 4cm with another lump behind adjoined so total of 5cm … not once have they said “big tumour” to me so please please stop panicking about 5cm. I don’t even know about nodes test so I could be in exactly the same position as you.
As the other ladies have said, treatment for bc has come a long way and is very treatable. Take comfort from moijan and her inspirational words.
Many hugs for you today … Sarah xxxx
Thank you Susan ( only joking ) Sarah ?
Thank you though - and yes I remember Hun . Are you still waiting for biopsy results then after the op ? Xx
Hi Zena, yes still waiting … I went on Tuesday for results but they weren’t back so going back on the 20th ? xxx
Oh yes - gosh - you went in and they didn’t have them… I’m sorry you’ve had to wait longer … they should have called you .
My bcn has just called and said I’m going on tamoxifen Monday and after ct they will look at op or chemo … thank god I rang this morning or I’d still be waiting-
Maybe give them a call Sarah to see if they in.
Sorry i for that my head is do all over . I’ve never been like this before and don’t like getting things wrong . It’s my job to remember things about people so it’s strange I can’t now ? Xxx
Lou, pink , Alex , Claire , Steph , Janey , Laura , Anne and anyone else I’ve not caught up with for a while … it would be good to hear about thoughts and feelings today for everyone?
Ps Yay Helena nearly at the end im so happy for you and will enjoy your champagne fuelled posts im sure lol xx
Glad that you’re getting somewhere now Zena. I wish that I had been given Tamoxifen after my op and waiting for chemo. It feels like nothing is happening at the minute. Hope you’re feeling a bit better and you will soon be able to tick the CT scan off your list xx
Hi Zena,
Thank you, but not so sure I am that rare! Xx and not everyone feels able to post their history.
When I was going through a similar situ…I posted on websites at the time…asking if others had had similar - and had lived for a long time!
i got quite a few ladies come back to say yes…and some had even more l/n with cancer in than I !
When you are feeling a bit better, you could start a thread asking for ladies who have had similar, to post…my guess is that most ladies on bcc dont see this thread, as they use other threads, some dont even post anything…they just look through…of course it can feel very daunting to start that kind of thread …and it makes you feel a bit exposed , but you might find there are ladies out there just like me.
glad my history helps you. As Jo said( I think). You will go up and down…thats quite normal. And I see you have been helping/supporting other ladies tooxx
take heart, my guess is you will be helping other ladies for quite a while…!
hugs,
Moijan???
Yes I do Jo , Tho I think they are just giving it to me to shut me up … as they don’t know if chemo or op as need to see scans before … yes more waiting . Are they waiting for you to heal more Jo ? Why no drugs yet , it’s so different for each of us.
That’s why during the waiting it’s helped me to get stuck into other holistic treatments and eating better , keeping my mind of the fear of results thing… your nodes were clear I thought or are you still waiting on oncology? X
I’ve got 2 sentinel nodes involved which were removed at mx. Originally ultrasound showed normal nodes so I don’t know how many are affected. I have to wait 6 weeks post surgery which I am now and I’m seeing onc on Monday and then waiting for a chemo chair. Apparently, it’s busy at the minute ?
That’s make me feel even better moijan , I will think about trying to start that thread …are you feeling ok as I know you are going through it again Hun ? X
What s a ct scan like ?? Do I need anything? I hated MRI coffin feel , not to mention the noise … what’s a bone scan like too ? Xx
Zena, CT is a lot quicker than MR and not as enclosed. Your head will be outside the gantry at all times. You will probably have something to drink before the scan and an injection of an x-ray contrast agent that might make you feel warm and you might get the sensation that you’ve wet yourself. It’s what I used to do. CT that is, not wet myself!!
Haha peeing myself after 3 kids is a regular occurrence lol … ( well only a bit - and after sneezing or laughing a lot )
Guess you know being Mum of 5 ?
Ok that sounds ok . Are we naked ? Is it cold - I hate cold ? X
Hey Zena
ive just caught up with this thread… i was heartbroken when you were struggling with the results. I have to say, anything is better than this period of time! I’m absolutely hating the waiting, the million different appointments, the depressing conversations with consultants and my bcn.
In the end I was diagnosed with stage 2 idc with multiple tumours…My MRI picked up other things in there too, I think dcis… but I’m having another ultrasound and biopsy on Tuesday. I had a sentinel biopsy/removal on Monday just gone so been just recovering this week. They took all 3 out to test… results in another weeks time ?
Also had an appointment with fertility clinic this morning, with a view to start having injections to preserve my ovaries throughout chemo and freeze eggs. Can’t believe I’m even having these conversations but hey ho! I’m ststuikg to become very matter of fact about it all. I’ve gone cold. Like I can’t cry anymore.
Think I’m starting chemo in a few weeks, after 2 sessions I’ll have another MRI to see if it’s working… then a lumpectomy or mx at the end of possibly 6 sessions. Why can’t I just have a mx now and just have rads?! I don’t want bloody chemo?
Like the other ladies have said, they will absolutely tailor your treatment, bc is not a death sentence anymore my lovely. Just think that at least they’ve got it now…
lots of hugs xx
That gobbledygook meant to say ‘starting’ !