I’ve had 2 lumpectomies and am about to have a mastectomy on left side this coming Friday (13th Sept).
How have others dealt with this?
I’m dreading looking down or in the mirror and being flat on one side. Your boobs define you after all. I’m feeling fear, anger and my mind is all over the place right now.
On top of all this my sister and I have planned the holiday of a lifetime on Dec 2nd to Australia and Bali visiting family.
Each time I have any contact with my surgeon it seems there’s more bad news. Obviously I won’t know what the post surgery treatment looks like yet (radio/chemo or both) until possibly weeks from now, which narrows the recovery time ahead of the holiday.
It’s all so time sensitive at the moment and extremely frustrating to say the least.
Welcome to the forum @trees1 . Sounds like you have had a really tough journey so far . Hopefully someone who has a mastectomy will respond to your post soon and share their experiences . Best of luck with your op on Friday and I really hope you get to go on your holiday to Australia . Best wishes Jill
I was exactly the same as you fearful, frightened and anxious about my surgery. I had a right Mastectomy on the 13th Aug and still very much recovering.
I would say the surgery wasn’t as bad as expected, however my recovery was much longer as I had suffered a hematoma after which meant I was back in theatre 10 days after my first surgery.
I would suggest prepare yourself as much as possible - anything like batch cooking ahead of the Op, getting some books to read, stocking up on supplies and getting a V pillow helps you be more comfortable. I was lucky and had my family round to help with cooking and cleaning which hugely helped in first few weeks.
Im slowly getting use to my new breast - it’s certainly still hard to look at myself, however it reminds me how lucky I am to still be here. I hope in the future I will be confident with my new body shape and it doesn’t define who I am.
So sorry that you are facing this. Like you, I had 2 lumpectomies followed by a mastectomy. Bad news at every turn No chemo or radiotherapy as risks outweighed benefits. Just hormone therapy for 10 years. Reconstruction wasn’t an option for me and I didn’t want it anyway.
The feelings you describe are not uncommon. I had similar feelings and 4 months on am still struggling with my new body and the effects of a bumpy uncertain journey. I’m having counselling at Maggie’s which is really helping.
If you’re not having a reconstruction, or having a delayed one Flat Friends is a great, supportive group with lots a great advice on living flat. https://flatfriends.org.uk/
You could also call the helpline on here or look into Someone like me where they link you with someone in a similar situation.
Good luck with the surgery which probably won’t be as bad as expected and I hope that you manage to have your holiday.
Oh wow.
Thank you for your kind words. I will definitely be ensuring all housework/laundry etc is up to date and I’ve got enough food in for a while.
Do you feel confident that it’s not noticeable to others I wonder?
I was dreading my mastectomy, couldn’t even look at photos of them before I had mine and I couldn’t have an immediate recon due to Covid/lockdown. I was very lucky with my surgeon, had no complications and he’s left a good scar which has healed beautifully. Due to how well that went I’ve decided not to have a reconstruction in case I’m not so lucky 2nd time around, and I know it will most likely be more painful. In fact I would prefer to be flat on both sides ( I don’t have the same thinking about my boobs defining me though?). What I’m trying to say is it’s really not as bad as I was expecting x
I agree with all what has been said.
I had a double mastectomy without reconstruction due to the nine-week wait that would have entailed.
I was really scared and anxious that I wouldn’t be able to look at myself and would not be able to get through it.
Six weeks on and I love it - I genuinely love it and don’t miss my 34g breasts one bit. Obviously I’d rather not lose them in this way, but I love how I feel.
I didn’t expect to feel like this and even my kids think the scars are nice and not scary!
How all goes well for you xx
I’m recovering from my mastectomy on 5th August and was wondering if you have been given the option as I was, to have a tissue expander put in ready to have reconstruction later. I was amazed post surgery to find I wasn’t totally flat as the surgeons had put some saline in during the op.
I had an implant reconstruction but there is still a size difference between my breasts. If I’m honest it’s not bothered me too much as I have been wearing baggy clothes. I have also bought the M&S Breast form which I will use when I’m wearing something tighter xx
Oh not been told about a tissue expander. Thanks I’ll mention that. My surgery has been cancelled as surgeon wants an endoscopy done first now. More waiting
Surgery has annoyingly been cancelled, as my surgeon now wants an Endoscopy done first. So that’s on 17th Sept, then wait for results etc etc. More time narrowing towards holiday date of 2 Dec. Sooo frustrating.
I hope the surgery went well. I have no advice to give, except to say: Hang in there… somehow we get through the storm. My own double mastectomy (3rd surgery this year) will be November 12. I will have immediate reconstruction and have been told I should be ok to travel long haul 6 weeks after unless I get an infection from the implant. That happens in 4% of cases apparently.
At any rate, my point is this: it’s a long way to december. So hopefully most will be done and dusted and you will have an amazing time. Sending you a hug
Hi. My surgery is now 4 October, so wanting to get that over and done with. Thanks for your kind words. I want this holiday to go ahead more than anything right now. Xxx
A message via the NHS App which I received at 7.22pm last night has left me absolutely furious. The reason being is it’s given me a breast care centre appointment on the exact day I am/was due my Mastectomy. It doesn’t mention nil by mouth, nor surgery, nor any reason, so now I’m thinking the worst as in they’ve found more cancer from Endoscopy on Tuesday so want to discuss the alternative now ie Chemo to treat whole body instead of surgery??? It’s now the weekend, so no redress until Monday. Called 111 which McMillan nurse suggested, but neither has access to my records to see what this appointment is for. I’ve been so positive from the very beginning when my initial consultant told me the treatment should be all finished within 10 weeks, I booked my and my sister’s Australia flights leaving uk 2 December for 6 weeks, however as time goes by the chances of going are reducing hence will lose thousands as wouldn’t cover me for cancer on insurance. I’m getting more and more anxious especially getting this appt and now not knowing what exactly it’s for. The Endoscopy on Tuesday was horrific. The consultant was the most coldest so-called professional without an ounce of bedside manner and whilst I was distressed just carried on as if he was rodding a drain. Now after biopsies marked urgent I get this appt., with no explanation at all which leaves me worrying now until Monday. So angry. Computer generated no doubt. Soo frustrated right now.
@trees1 I am so sorry to hear that you are having such a hard time.
I’m due a double mastectomy thursday, it is so stressful waiting for it.
Ive had several reminder texts about telephone appointments that i knew nothing about. I asked the breast unit and they said its a new system where the Breast cancer nurse puts a reminder on the system to call you and doesn’t realise that you get a text too. Not very helpful as its stressful waiting and not knowing. It may not be the same for you - but hope your surgery date isn’t changed.
I received a confirmation letter for my surgery appt, a pre op appointment and an appt to go in the day before for the dye injection for the sentinel node biopsy.
I was also told the grade (1) from the biopsy and thats its likely i wont need radiotherapy or chemo, but cant be guaranteed until the pathology results from the surgery- but im quite hopeful.
Take care and hope you get your answers soon
