Hi there,
Having had chemo, lumpectomy and RT last year, I now need a mastectomy, scheduled for 31st August.
Am trying to get my head round it, and especially trying to think through what I can do to make myself feel better post-op, especially before I’ve healed enough to wear a full prosthesis.
So I’d really appreciate any tips on good bras, good clothes to wear, recommendations for swimwear, etc.
I’m tall and fairly slim with a long neck, but with broad shoulders and big arms (and a big bum, so worried about the lack of proportion!) Not particularly big-breasted to start with, around 36B-C. But I don’t usually wear high-cut tops as they don’t suit my shape.
So am trying to work out, e.g. if I don’t wear a bra will it minimise the difference in size, then maybe wear a ‘tunic’ that flares from just below the neckband? This is the kind of thing I’ve always avoided as it really accentuates my pear shape! Also thinking: scarves, shawls, high-ish camisole with shirt, layers?
Seriously any tips at all, re: hospital stay, what it’s like wearing a ‘comfy’, anything… all gratefully received!! Thanks!
Wearing the cushion has its drawbacks but I pinned it into soft vests and wore open shirts or jackets on top. It was ok while I healed but I would suggest smock tops that are all floaty to cover your essential area and you feel cool in this heat! Anything with a yoke is good and if you’re not too large you can even go without a bra or cushion in this humid weather. Leaving hospital I would suggest something baggy not clingy so you can feel comfortable without worrying too much… At home I wore a dressing gown until I gained confidence!
I had my mastectomy in February and enjoyed the winter layers to swirl around me as I got used to my new shape. I found contemporary scarves a real boon to swirl over my missing chest and help with my confidence. Now I have a prosthesis and good bras and I feel extremely confident when I dress. I did try adapting some of my old bras but they were too revealing and the worry would be if my prosthesis slipped out…!!! So, I invested in proper mastectomy bras with pockets (Amoena and M&S have been great for me. I started with secret support tops, moved onto soft cotton sports bras and then finally the really big investment of pocketed bras!) and even though they are sensible they can look like another layer under tops. Mine are very simple and without adornments so if they show I feel fine.
I’m sure your BCN will support you too and other women here. Given your size and height you will have to rethink your overall look. That can be quite challenging but I started with just one or two outfits where I had practiced bending down and how I looked at every angle. I then did look for some new clothes because like you I had to balance my smaller chest with my ever growing girth. (It’s still growing now…!!)
Now I feel I have an array of summer outfits but I dread the really steamy hot days when I would have just worn a little vest! I manage with cooler cotton flowing tops but the loss of vest tops is my only sadness. I will not have a reconstruction and am happy with my ‘false’ chest look. I really hope you feel confident and comfortable with your new body. It may take time but I’m sure you will get to a point of acceptance too.
Good luck and if you ever want to contact me again, please do.
Best wishes from Welsh girl x
Hi Ladies,
I had my mx last September and was advised to get some good non wired mastectomy bras with a pocket ready for when I was able to wear a bra.
I also bought some M&S sport bras which are very comfy to wear with your ‘sponge bob’.
The best advice I can give you is have a few tops that button up the front because its not easy getting things over your head when you first come out of hospital especially if you have a drain. I also bought front buttoned pj’s which I lived in for the first week.
I had to take a bra into the hospital with me so that they could fit me with a sponge bob before I came out although I didn’t wear it for a while.
I’m a 36G cup so a little bigger than you but I can honestly say that I have not had to change my clothes too much. I am still wearing a lot of my pre mx clothes but sometimes have to be careful if the neckline is a bit low or gapes, then I wear a lace topped camisole under which normally works quite well. I do have to be careful because my prothesis is so big that if I bend forward and my neckline is too low then everyone gets an unpleasant eyeful of scars etc!!!
I also like to wear patterned tops to distract the eye a bit.
Hopefully you will not have to go and buy a whole new wardrobe…unless you want to!!!
I am deciding at the moment whether to go for recon or not. I am having a prophylactic mx on the other side so can be totally flat chested or have a nice new pair of boobies.
Hope this helps,
Love
Jane xx
Thanks Welsh girl and Jane. This is really great ‘inside info’. I am making a note of everything so I can properly start working out my plan of action once I get back from hospital! Please keep these tips coming, it is great to know what has worked for other people!
I am tall and broad shouldered with b/c cup boobs and after mx gave taken to wearing a lot of boat neck & cowl neck tops. Going for the ‘layered’ look with vest tops under shirts is good too.
When the weather was cooler, I wore a lot of pashmina type scarves knotted at the neck and so could go braless without the one boob noticing.
Hi,
I had my mastectomy in April and heres my tips!
bras and tops were difficult while the site was healing- although you do have a dressing on at first and most of the area was ( and still is) completely numb. Its not the flat side that matters it just looks wierd having the other one hanging down unsupported (mine are quite saggy!)
I bought an expensive post surgery bra which was a waste of money as the sides came up high and hurt under the arm. I ended up wearing a tightish camisole with the softie pinned in when I had visitors. I then moved on to one of those camisoles with a support shelf (m&s)- buy a roomy size and you can pop the softie between the shelf and outside layer. You will have to step in and out of it as youre arm will have limited movement at first. I kept getting stuck in my clothes and shouting for my husband for help!
I then moved on to this bra eloise.co.uk/mastectomy-bras/non-wired/anita-nastasja-ultra-light-bra-white
I love it because you can wear all your low cut tops and dresses and it just looks like youre wearing a camisole under.
I did have to sew a bit of elastic at the back so it was very loose at first. (you can buy bra extenders on amazon)
I’ve now bought other bras for a bit more shape and support.
Dont worry once you are in a bra you will look totally normal from the outside. Even with a softy and especially once you get your prosthesis. I am surprised how low I can go! you certainly dont need high cut things.
A really soft pashmina is great for the hospital, sitting up and cuddling. I wore mine for about 2 weeks after- hides everything.
I genuinely dont think about it at all now - In fact I frequently go around one boobed in front of friends and family.
I bought the goddess bikini from here aboutthegirl.co.uk/swimwear
its expensive but it looks fantastic
Be prepared for the constipation! Glycerin suppositories are fab- Relief without the stomach cramps.
I cant think of anything else,
good luck,
Naomi
My advise is to be comfortable whilst you are healing. My BC nurse seemed very keen to get me back in a bra for some reason which is still not clear to me. Go braless at home whenever you can, your family will soon get used to it.
I recently bought some strappy tops with built in pocketed bra from Nicola Jane, I wear them all the time with a loose shirt over the top, on hot days I wear a foam swimming prothesis as I find it cooler than the silicone one.
I have to be careful as my Mx does notice if my neckline is too low, this is because the site of my cancer was high up on the chest wall by the breast bone so I have a dent there,but no one seems to notice it but me. I just pin shirts closed at the top to hide it if I’m at work.
I bought some post surgery bras from Asda which I wore for the first six weeks after my mx with my softie. I bought a couple of loose boat neck tops (with some nice necklaces and bracelets to cheer me up) and I found these easy to take on and off.
Six weeks post op I took some time getting my prosthesis right, I saw the breast form fitter a few times. I went to a specialist shop to be measured for a bra. I would recommend doing this if you can because you will get advice and the staff can make a note of your requirements so you can ring them up after that and ask them to post items to you. Also, it gives you confidence if you get your bra and prosthesis right.
I did have some trouble at first even in high neck tops because my prosthesis is quite big and heavy and it pulled my bra down if I bent over and if my top gaped you could see right down to my scar! I sorted this out by securing my tops with body tape. If you are smaller breasted this might not be a problem.
I thought it might be helpful to post information about BCC Lingerie Evenings.
Best wishes,
Anna BCC Facilitator
Searching for suitable bras and lingerie after breast surgery can be a frustrating and difficult experience. Breast Cancer Care’s lingerie evenings help take the stress out of shopping for such items, providing you with tips and guidance on what works well for you, all in a welcoming and friendly environment.
Breast Cancer Care staff are also available to chat through concerns and feelings about body image following surgery.
Lingerie evenings are for women who have had breast surgery and are looking for support and advice to find bras and lingerie that are right for them, at any stage following surgery. They last around two and a half hours and you will usually be in a group of around 20 women.
We’ve got sessions coming up in Newcastle, Chichester, Liverpool and Glasgow.
Thanks everyone for all these fantastic tips - this is more and better information than I could possibly have imagined!
Got my M&S camisoles ready - I didn’t realise they did a specific ‘post-surgery’ one until I looked online. Was really impressed it’s cheaper than the normal ‘secret support’ ones, and they automatically remove the VAT at checkout, and waive the delivery charge!
Unfortunately I had it delivered to store for collection as it was quicker and one when missing in transit so I had to re-order, but to their credit the local store phoned me up as soon as they realised to stop me having a wasted journey, and gave me the number to call, and I got the automated email confirmation of the problem AND someone from their Direct team tried to call me and emailed me when he couldn’t reach me. Excellent customer service, just hope they get it to me on Thursday as they’ve said.
Am just over 3 weeks since my mx and although not had a lot of pain when i wear bra it’s really rubbing and gets irritated and feels chaffed (funny word). It has healed well but still a bit tender. Can i use any cream on it like e45? Or does anybody have any advice it’s getting to the point it’s getting on my nerves.
HI, just to add my twopeneth! I am a 36D and just about got away with sloggi tops or cheaper equivalent from other stores post surgery until I felt able to wear more usual bras. I didn’t wear anything at all for maybe two weeks or so - I had my mx in April this year. When I was bra free I wore patterned tops and pashminas and it helped me a lot until I got used to the new me.
The other brill thing I found for when you start wearing your bra of choice with prosthesis is double sided lingerie tap - its about 4 quid from john lewis. I was reluctant to give up some of my favourite but lowish tops so I just wear them and stick the bra or teeshirt to my skin - the tape is invisible. As my chest is fairly concave at a fairly high point it stops the concave bits showing if I lean forward - makes me feel better.
Our house was like piccaduilly circus for weeks afer my op and only 1 man out of all the visitors actually stared at my empty chest. I am planning to have words with him now I’m feeling stronger cos it was very horrible at the time, but that was the only bad experience I’ve had.
Just about to start going prosthesis free again for radiotherapy!
best of luck, Nicola
Hi. I had my mx at the end of Jan and from the three days post mx I always wore my prosthesis during the day. To start with my softie with cami tops and within two weeks soft bras. Agree with Nicolas view on tape. It really does help. By the way I have just completed rads and have worn my usual bra and prosthesis throughout without any problem. Perhaps I have just been lucky but I can recommend the radiance gel sold by the Penny Brohn centre as it seems to have worked for me. It is expensive but definitely worth it so far.
Hi, it is very normal to still be tender after 3 weeks, don’t forget you are healing inside as well. I bought post surgery bras from Asda-£6. when I felt ready ( my MX was April) bought a couple of glam MX bras and cammi tops but still wear my Asda ones as they are so comfy.
Carol