Hiya girls hope your both ok,
Jill. glad your feeling much better , and good on you for going commando with the hair, mine also has come back a mix of very dark brown and also some greys, i had a few highlights put in a couple of weeks ago and it was fine i had last chemo mid january so only 3 and a bit mths . Mines also come back quite thick too.
Fi, Ive also been feeling a bit down last couple of days , lately it seems to get to me most at night, proberly because tthe days are busy and am occupied, its blooming hard sometimes just to slot back in to normal life, and i still get tired a lot too.
Well i had the result of my recent smear test today and it was normal, so thank the lord, at least thats one less thing to worry about.
Take care both of you
Chat soon
Love Lindiloo xx
Hya Girls,
Just a quickie as I am just on my way into town so will come back on later. Just wanted to check you are both OK. Hope you are feeling a bit better Fiona, and have rested. Good News Lindiloo about the smear, really pleased, great news. My BCN came yesterday, she was here 3 hrs so we had a really good chat, and I felt better afterwards, she is very good therapy. Going to have a natural dye colour on my hair as she said it is ok after 6 weeks, think it will make me feel better about myself as grey seems to drain me a bit.
Know what you mean about slotting back into normal life, we have been on a rollercoaster journey for a year so it will take time, I have learnt now that when the energy go awol then I rest, says she off to the shops again!!! lol
Well girls I hope you are both having a good day, and I willl chat later.
Love n Hugs
Jillxx
Hi Girls
Glad to hear your still feeling better Jill. I too have a very good bcn - it makes a difference.
Lindiloo - really glad about smear - one less thing for you to worry about it - god knows when mine is due. Sorry to hear youve been feeling down too - I think we are just going to get periods like that and will have to roll with it - hopefully they will get less as out energy levels etc get back to normal - its not easy tho to get back to normal - cos nothing will ever be normal for us again will they?
Work still very busy for me so no rest time - I am really tired already and I have to work till Monday evening - boo hoo!! Suzie away to London on Monday tho so I can have lots of long lies next week and catch up a bit - am gonna need it.
Off for a wee relax and wind down before bed - my head is still spinning with work things!
Take care girlies
Love and hugs to you both
Fi
xxx
Hiya girls hope your both ok,
Just wrote a post and lost it urghhh, dont you hate that
Jill, so glad you feeling much better and had a good chat with your BCN, it can realy help if you can talk through all your worries and emotions. I dont know about you both but everyone i know seems to think its time to put it behind me and get on with life. (Yeah Right it aint that easy) i try not to mension BC anymore cos i know people will tell me i have to be positive (which i am most of the time)and not dwell on things, they also tell me i read to much on the internet and dont think i should still be comeing on this site anymore. I know they mean well but they will never understand the emotional impact BC has on us will they. I also understand though that it must be a strain too on them if we keep talking about it, Its bloody hard sometimes though isnt it because we are the ones liveing with it. Wish the docs had a cure for our thoughts lol sometimes i think they tell us too much nowerdays, ignorance is bliss i think.
Fi, you sound as though youve been realy busy again , hope your feeling a bit brighter now too , think we all need a bloomin good holiday lol, Hows your dad settleing in? hope hes enjoying his new home ,i expect hes made new fiends there too , i know my mum did when she moved into shelterd houseing as there was lots of stuff going on if you wanted it.
Well girls, was realy peed off that andy came bottom in eurovision , didnt deserve that lol think we realy should pull out in future , its a joke isnt it !
take care girls and chat to you both soon.
Lots of Hugs
Lindiloo xx
Hey Lindiloo
Know what you mean about everyone thinking we should move on - I have had that too - but it really is not that easy - they should bloody try it in our shoes. On the other hand, with me working in a hospital - there are still people coming up to me and saying lovely things and that I look so well etc. I had a shower tonight when I got home from work - and I dont know about you - but I still get a shock a lot of the time when I shower or moisturise - and you shower the breast you have, and must have kind of forgotten about the other one - wash it and get a shock to find its not there - is that just me???
Work has been hellishly busy - both emotionally and physically - 4th day on tomorrow - tonight was the first night I have got away on time - its just crazy. God knows how I am going to get out of bed tomorrow - hence showering tonight - am going to have 15 mins longer in bed in morning - like that will make a big difference???
Jill - hope you are doing ok???
I have missed out on cracking weather here last few days - it had better be nice this week when I am off - grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Love to you both
F
xxxx
Hey girls
You both ok???
Maybe u both busy with half term
Sending you both hugs ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Love
Fi
xxx
hiya girls hope your both ok,
Sorry i didnt get to post yesterday, Havent been on Pc much as arm pain giveing me a lot of trouble , i rang my Gp this morning for a appointment but they didnt have any appointments for today (typical) anyway Dr rang me back this afternoon and after a long chat about symptoms hes booked me in to see him tomorrow afternoon. The pain in my left arm is realy painfull when i move it a certain way and aches the rest of the time, and my wrist on other arm is giveing me problems too i only came online last night for a bit but after useing the mouse on keyboard for a while my wrist was so painfull i had to come off. I wake up with a pain in my wrist and other arm bloody acheing. Its realy getting me down now and have been getting a bit tearfull last few days with it. Im praying its just something simple but had it about 7 weeks now and its not improveing , but you know what its like now after BC you convince yourself it could be something sinister when things dont get better. Im so fed up with it all at the moment ,like you both i just want my bloody life back ,(pain free) sometimes i think i feel worse now than before treatments. Sorry girls for being on a bit of a downer Dr will hopefully put my mind at rest tomorrow .
Hope youve both had a good day , anyway keep your chin up (listen to me lol)
take care
Lots of Love
Lindiloo xx
Lindiloo
So sorry your feeling so lousy - as you say - every ache and pain we think is something sinister. I too feel like an old woman - aching joints - wake up during the night and feel like an old woman because joints etc are so stiff. As you say - before dx, I felt fit and healthy - its the bloody poison and radiation they have used to get rid of the bloody disease that does this. I am sure you have nothing to worry about L - but easy for me to say I know. Sounds like nerve pain or something like that. Please try and let us know how you get on at doc tomorrow
Thinking of you
Much Love
F
xxxxxxxxxx
Thanks Fi,
Saw the Dr this afternoon and he gave me a through going over , had me doing lots of different arm lifts and movements in different directions, he spent 30 mins with me which was nice of him , there was one where i had to put my thumb out to the side and see how far i could lift my arm , i only managed about 6 inches untill i got pain, he said i had inflamation and the fluid gets trapped round the muscles. He has given me a cortisone injection into my shoulder ,and it has definately eased somewhat (thank the lord) he wants to see how i go over the weekend but if i am still haveing bad pain by monday then he wants to refer me for Physio. As for my wrist on other arm he says i have a superficial thrombophlebitis caused by the chemo (bloody chemo ) and has given me Hirudoid cream and high dose Dicloflex tablets to hopefully dispurse the clot , so am hopeing all will do the trick lol, cos it is realy affecting the things i can do without bloody pain, more so my job as homehelp because i ofen need to move furniture, turn mattresses ect and i just cant do it right now. It is a bloomin relief to know what is now at least ,
What you been up to Fi, did you say you had a few days off, hope the weather is nice for you, bit overcast here but warm, have you been at the Gym or swiming lately? i know what you mean about being up in the night (me too oh for a whole nights sleep wouldnt that be nice) How are you getting on with the counselling now i hope it is going ok. Hope your dads settled into his new home.
Jill, hope your ok and come back on soon.
Take care, and look after yourselves , chat later
Lots of Love
Lindiloo xx
Hi Lindiloo
Really glad you seem to be getting things sorted - sounds like you have a great GP - not many of those around.
The cording on my right arm has been getting a lot tighter lately so I have started doing my exercises again - along with back exercise - AND relaxation stuff from my counsellor!!
Weather has not been good on days off but never mind. I am on a night shift tonight - yeuch yeuch and yeuch - I HATE nights - but it is only 1 - the first on in about 10 months. We have been really busy at work and having m ajor staffing probs so we are moving to another area of the hospital next week as a temporary measure - god knows how thats going to work out - and I am working the day of the move!.
Dad has settled well into his new home - its lovely and peaceful - but he still has his old routine so apart from a nicer, quieter place, his life is unchanged.
I am back to the gym and swimming - saw physio about my back and she recommended I go back to gym - its tough going tho but will stick to it.
Jill - really hope you ok
Take care both of you
Love and hugs
Fiona
xx
Hiya Fi,
Hope your night shift went ok and your not too knackered,sounds like you are going to be extra busy at work over the next few weeks, no rest for the wicked eh lol. Glad that your dad is likeing his new flat and has settled in ok.
Getting a bit worried about Jill again hope she is doing ok and is mabe just haveing a break from the forums.
Yes my Gp is very good bless him, i saw him over at the sheltered houseing place where i work today and he asked how my arm was , the injection has helped but still got some pain still so he said to come up to the surgery next week and we will start some physio, so hopefully im gonna get sorted. Sorry your haveing problems with cording , bloody desease eh just when you think your getting on ok something happens to knock you back a bit again.i guess we may never be completely right dont you think? its gonna leave us with something no doubt.
Are you at work over the weekend? Glad to hear your back at the gym and swimming ,i think swimming is proberly the best exercise of all dont you.
Well Fi, hope you have a good weekend not sure what im doing yet depends on hubbys shifts so chat tomorrow and take care of yourself.
Lots of Hugs
Lindiloo x
Hi Lindiloo
I too am a bit worried about Jill again - hope she is ok.
There are not many good Gp’s around are there - mine to is very good.
I agree with you that we will never be ‘quite right’ - as you say - bloody disease will always leave something with us. God I only have to sit down for half and hour and I am bloody stiff as anything when I get up - I know I am 40 now but bloody hell!
Night shift was night shift - knackering. I am not at work over weekend. Just waiting for Suzie to come home later tonight - hopefully by 11pm - hope I am not past sleep by then.
Enjoy your weekend whatever you do.
Lots of love
Fiona
xx
Hiya girls hope your both ok,
Well girls what did you think about the nancy result, i picked Jody right from the start she just seemed to be your typical nancy i thought, Jessie was very good too last night though, so bad luck for her. Then it was over to Britians Got Talent (must get a life lol) awh, i picked george too lol, i like him bless him he got so wet then had to do it all over again , thought he was brilliant for his age, I liked the 4 girl violinists too they were very good. Well guess its bloomin Big brother next on the tv list lol.
Haveing a lazy day today ,hubbys at work so dinners cooking, cleanings done so now putting my feet up. Have you been up to much? Hope Suzie got home ok Fi, did you manage to stop awake lol.
Well take care and chat soon
Lots of Hugs
Lindiloo xx
Hi Lindiloo
Good ya for picking Jodie and the young lad. I must say I did not like Jodie that much - thought she was way over the top when she was talking etc - but hey ho. You shoul dmaybe try betting next time!!
Yep - guess I will be tuned in to channel 4 thursday night too - saddo!!
Its peeing down rain here now - managed to get the grass cut this morning tho.
I am doing an extra shift tomorrow at work - regretting saying yes now tho - I am still exhausted from night shift.
Suzie got home fine and nice and early.
Speak to you soon
Love
F
xx
Hiya girls,
Hope your extra shift went ok today Fi, and your not too knackered , wish we could hear from Jill just to know she is ok , hopefully she will be able to come back online soon.
Had a bit of sad news today, one of the ladies i work for died this morning , she was 94 bless her so a grand old age, but i still find it hard because when you visit people for a few years in their own homes you get very attached to them , although i love what i do, i sometimes find it a bit depressing too, especialy now. I expect you feel the same with your job sometimes as well .Life eh?
Glad to hear Suzie got home nice and early ,bet your glad to have her back home with you. My son will be back home on the 18th after hes finished his month working in devon, so will be nice to have him back for a bit.
Guess il be tuneing into Big Brother too apparently they are going back to basics this year, so will have to see who they have put in the house this time, i read somewhere theve all got asbos lol so not doubt will be interesting .
Well take care and make sure you put your feet up tonight Fi ,lol
Chat soon
Love Lindiloo xx
Hi Lindiloo
So sorry to hear about your old lady - even tho she was a ripe old age I completely understand what your saying about getting attached. Work like ours can be depressing - but dont you find at times like that in the end it makes you thankful for what you have?
Extra shift was hellish - and today was too - been going into work at 730am - meant to finish at 8pm but its been 9pm or after yesterday and today - with no real meal breaks. The patients we have (especially patient I have been looking after) are so highly dependent and very changeable - I just have not stopped. Its what I am trained for, and makes the shift go quick - but am getting tired - numerous people commented today how tired I looked.
I am off tomorrow, but its a bit of a sad day - as it should have been mums 70th birthday. Dad and I are going to grave where we scattered her ashes, going to plant a rosebush, and lay some other flowers - so its gonna be emotional. We will then go out for lunch tho and toast her. Its just yet another hurdle we have to get over. I am hoping to get up and go for a swim before I go to dads but not sure if I will be able to get up on time as really tired.
I too wish we would hear from Jill - really worried about her now. Its strange how we have never met but I do think about her lots, and you if I dont hear from you. If your reading this JIll, hope you are well and just having a break. Lots of Love xxxx
Well spose I will go and try to wind down.
Take care for now Lindiloo
Hopefully I will get home on time for bb starting on Thursday - altho not going to hold my breath.
Bye for now
Love and hugs
Fiona
xxx
Hiya Fi,
You must be realy tired with all the hours your putting in at work, and not right when you cant get proper meal breaks, sounds like your still very short staffed at the min, it must be hard going for you especialy after all youve been through, you do realy well to do all you do, but sometimes i think employers can take advantage of us a bit, i hope it will ease up a bit for you soon .
I hope today went ok its bloody tough sometimes isnt it, its lovely that you and your dad are planting a rose bush for your mum , birthdays and aniversaries are always a difficult time .
Hope you managed to get your swim this morning too, but if not, i wouldnt worry about it too much, cos sounds like you could realy do with some extra sleep,
Jill realy hope your ok pet. xxx
Take care both of you and chat later
Love Lindiloo xx
Hi Lindiloo
HOws your day been?
Today was emotional as expected but ok. We did what we had to do and the sun shone for us so thats another hurdle over I suppose.
It started off really grey here but its beautiful now - went for a walk to asda with Suzie.
Did not manage a swim - stayed in bed longer instead - def needed it but could have been doing with long. Back to work tomorrow day shift then night Friday - nightmare - and I know its gonna be as busy.
Hope the sun is shining for you too
Lots of Love
Fi
xx
Hiya Fi,
Hope your ok, good luck with your night shift later, hope its not too busy again and you manage to at least get some proper breaks.
The weathers been glorious again here so am hopeing the weekend will be the same so can get out and about. Was working this morning then me and mum went up the cematary to put flowers on dads grave, we go there every friday ,we all miss him so much .
My middle son (who is 24) is comeing down with his girlfriend on the 29th of this month so looking forward to that ,havent seen him since christmas as he lives in lincs.Hopefully the weather will still be nice so we can go out lots lol .
Well Fi, hope you have a good weekend , have you got any time off hope so.
Take care and chat soon
Lots of Love
Lindiloo xx
Hi Lindiloo
The gorgeous weather is passing me by - its really foggy here on coast - but just 40 miles inland my friend is basking in the sunshine.
Night shift was night shift - but its the quietist shift we have had in a long time - altho that also made it very long!
Going to my friend Sarahs tonight as it is her birthday - we might go to a quiz night - but shes still trying to get tickets!
Have a nice weekend.
Still worrying about Jill
Lots of love
Fiona
xx