the hospital say YES!!! can go to mobile unit tomoz - i cant believe how happy that makes me today - little things…it means i will be home tomoz by 4pm rather than 10pm -
My docs is just minutes from my house - so i wandered over by myself - as for OH i give up - did tell him i might as well be doing it all by myself!! I think cos so far i’ve been lucky and am ok in between (relatively) I sort of shoot myself in the foot re help.
Didnt get to see Mamma Mia at cinema yesterday - there was a massive queue!! So we all went to the pub for a girly drink - two of my friends are having their 1st baby’s soon - so the chat was all about that which was great - no mention of th C word - very normal and had a laugh too. Got home after OH too - girls stayed in with the dogs - just acquired another black Labrador (3 yrs - she was going to be shot cos shes no good as a gun dog !!! Im a soft touch I know)
Got my lazy weekend planned - bought some new books to read - get some shopping today - so staying at home. doing nothing.
Soz you didnt do so well yesterday - hope its better today - I try not to think too far ahead i must admit - although we are trying to plan a week away in Ireland in Oct after chemo and before rads - Theres a massive horse fair in Galway - so if we can find a cottage at a reasonable rent we might get away which will give us something to look forward to.
take care I must do some work today…hopefully…the enthusiasm’s waning
Hi Girls
I’ve been reading your posts with interest you both seem to be having problems with the OH’s makes you wonder why we needed men in the first place doesn’t it! though I am lucky to have one who is caring but then there’s a big difference in our ages to you young things.
You both seem to be coping well with your treatments despite the side effects I rally admire the way you are both going through it and keeping the spirits up. Leesha the Dogs trust site have cottages on for holidays and they seem quite reasonable I know cos I looked for when we went to the Peak district with our Heinz 57. My daughter has a gorgeous black labrospan it was supposed to be pedigree black cocker spaniel but the father is definitely a black lab and it does show in Milo; the court case against the breeder is in August as he charged her £400 and gave her a pedigree certificate. still that’s by the by; how’s the hay making going?
I’ve been busy working and seeing family and friends my 9 week old grandson is growing quickly and is gorgeous and I’ve to make a fairy princess castle birthday cake for my 7 yr old granddaughter for next weekend so life isn’t dull. Healthwise I’m fine apart from being bright red from the radiotherapy and the heat is making my clothes a bit uncomfortable but I’m fine.
Kinden sorry you seem to be going throught the mill but now you’ve contacted the helpline you’ll feel more settled I’m sure i hope all goes wwell with the rest of your treatment. Hopw your sister did well in the run.
It’s a shame when sisters are’nt nearby when you need them to just be there mine lives up north so isn’t as far away as yours and Leesha’s so she was able to come down and give me a hug and words of comfort when I felt really down.
Leesha don’t work if you don’t feel really up to it I did as I thought since I was caught early and it wasn’t big I was ok but it was only the week after the radio finished that I felt really ill and had a really terrible cough couldn’t breathe etc the doc said I’d been foolish to keep working through and had overdone it and wasn’t helping my treatment so please be careful.
Take care both speak to you soon must get my shopping list for this cake sorted!
Maggie xx
Yes, just finished first week of rads. OK so far, boob a bit red and hot and nipple swollen but other than that, not so bad. Travelling is a bit of a bind - 36 mile round trip. After treatment today went for lunch with my 2 of my sisters-in-law - was nice to just mooch round the shops and do ‘normal’ things. Didn’t buy anything, though there were plenty of sales on. How’re you doing? Are you up to anything over the weekend?
Lovely to hear from you again Maggie and Claire. Maggie it sounds like you’re really enjoying your grandchildren, good for you. I hope the cake goes well. Claire it’s great to do something ‘normal’ and not talk about bc at all sometimes isn’t it?
Leesha - hope your chemo went well yesterday and that you’re not feeling too bad. Galway is beautiful. I went there as a backpacker about 15 years ago, and took the boat to the Arun Islands, where there are no cars. I met a South African girl, Australian girl and Canadian girl and we all talked about the differences between our countries over a few pints of the black stuff, it was amazing. Will you take horses with you?
I am ‘coming to’ after the last FEC. Been much more in my head this time, headaches and hurts to move my eyes, sensitive to light, hence lack of posting. Also feel really tired + every time I try to rest, someone turns up or phones! Starting to have night sweats, haven’t had a period since 20th June so it looks like I’m into my first menopause (onc said periods likely to come back during rads then have another menopause on tamoxifen - oh joy). Still freezing cold in the day time, though it’s hot + sunny outside.
Got a children’s party this afternoon, and a surprise 40th bbq tomorrow, so it will be nice to do normal things.
Soz been offline - having laptop cleaned - 3rd FEc went well - having it done at mobile unit is brill (if having treatment can be expressed that way) I was in and out in 2hrs got cup og tea & cake very relaxed. Was home by 4.30 much more relaxing and less tiring. I did make myself take it easy all weekend - refused to drive anywhere made OH do it all… so feel better now - head bit fuzzy & hazy today - am working but only a bit at a time - at least i can pick it up & put it down…
Well hay still hasnt been made - the bolke didnt turn up on Thursday and now its rained so will have to wait bit longer - who cares I dont!
I agree with the resting bit - i tried to have time out in my room quietly - then my girls decide they’d rather sit with me upstairs - and seemed quite put out when I told them to ‘push off’!!! I dont like it too noisey at the moment.
Hope the party’s go ok
Hi there
Glad to know you’re all ok. Claire how many rad sessions have you got to have? Keep putting on plenty of aqueous cream I put it on 3 times a day and it did keep the soreness at bay I still got red but not as bad as it could have been they told me I could put it on about an hour before I had the radiotherapy to help. so i did cos my appts were usually around 4pm so I put it on first thing then about 3 and then last thing at night, I also only wore a crop top type bra as anything else irritated. It’s nice to chill afterwards whether it be retail therapy or what and do something nice after all it gets tedious towards the end so you need something to pep you up.
Kinden
Hope you enjoyed your BBQ and kids party and hope you’re feeling a bit warmer now hopefully it will pass as the treatment concludes.
Leesha
Glad to know you’re taking it easier and not doing so much work stuff the hay! you’re more important. Has your OH got used to the idea now that he’s got to take on more in the way of family responsibilities I sometimes think that the men think they’ve done their bit once you’ve conceived and the rest is up to you.Totally different if it was them in your shoes!
Anyway take care all speak to you soon
Maggie
Actually Maggie - I think part of the problem has been me - by not admiting when things are tough he thinks its all ok - so this time i’ve told him when im tired - this week has been harder tiredness wise i must admit. Not had the pain in the arm from the inflammed vein this time - just achy shoulders & neck plus a pain in my calf (why there i’ve no idea) got up this morning and it felt like i’d pulled a muscle - still achy but got no worse. So yesterday i actually told him how knackered i felt and did get bit emotional - he was quite good - when he got home he got his own food and did nt wake me up - I got up this morning to a clean & tidy kitchen - it was like having a little tidy ‘elf’ how lovely. Its the little things.
So when asked to pick our eldest up on sat night there was no moaning (it was all no trouble at all) Long may it last!!
The bit i really hate this week is the fuzzy head - not being able to think straight…
Hopefully by weekend will have more energy - I did feel better tis morning when I took dogs out for a walk - so think little stroll each day is called for.
Just checking in to let you know I’m doing really good. FEC 3 has been much easier that FEC 2 was for me, and I’ve been out a lot, enjoying feeling well.
Am dreading starting TAX next week though. OH still wants us to go to the UK the following week, but I’m not so sure. Chemo nurse says it’s a really bad time to mix with others, and I’m not sure I want my friends from home to see me looking like a freak etc.
Also, have found out that OH has joined a number of dating sites, and still thinking what to do about it.
Hi Leesha
Glad to know that things have got better with your OH and hope you feel better soon how much longer on the chemo have you got and will you be having radio then?
I think walking the dog is very therapeutic I walk ours every morning first thing before going to work it seems to wake me up properly and I’m more set for the day it probably helps to clear the fuzziness too.
Kinden
Pleased to know you’re getting on so well; you may find travelling to UK a bit of an upheaval it’s bound to be more tiring than when you’re well, and I wouldn’t worry about friends seeing you looking like a freak as you put it (though I’m sure you don’t) if they’re good friends they will understand what you’re going through and think nothing of your appearance.
I would ask your OH why he feels the need for going on dating sites and it doesn’t help your morale or to cope with things if you’re worrying about that.
I’m good at the moment still have to watch what I’m wearing if anything is too tight around the arm then it goes numb and my boob goes rock hard but otherwise everything is hunky dory and I’m back to living a normal life. Long may it continue!!
Hi all - stupidly worked all day yesterday!! (needed to earn some dosh) but added going shopping for food on top of it…needless to say cream crackered again!! Lazy day today then,.
Maggie - glad normaility is reappearing…reassuring too…I’ve got three more FEC then 15 rads… getting there slowly ut surely… Three weeks seems to go by more quickly each time…
As for OH…well each time hes does something nice and i think great…he manages to upset the boat again… had major hissy at him on SUnday…In fact managed to tell him that his bags were on top the wardrobe and if he didnt buck up he might as well pack them…cos I felt like i was doing this all by my self so I might as well carry on. And like a bloke hes not talked about it and is carrying on as if I didnt say anything. How the 'h**l do you get them to talk?
Kinden I really feel for you…you have to try to talk somehow…I wonder if my relationship wasnt that good before the cancer so its really showing the cracks when the pressures on. I will be truthful I am questioning whether I want to be here in the next five years? If anything having cancer has highlighted that I have a right to be happy and sod everyone else. Usually I’m the less selfish one who puts everyone else first. I told him all we seem to have is the kids and what happens when they leave home?..to which his only answwer was ‘they wont leave home’!!! says it all doesnt it.
Hey ho - rant over - hope you get things sorted… why dont you send OH to UK with children and you have alzy quiet week?
take care all xxxx Leesha
Feeling much better - amazing what a good rant can do. OH been much better this week. much better it now the hols so no rushing around taking then to and from school. Much more quality time together. They are both off to pony camp next week - which fits in well with 4th FEC on friday - so next week am only responsible for me.
Works pretty mad at the moment too … got extra to do…but have said wont do anything next week. So trying to get it all done this week.
Hopefully talk to you soon
I’m doing good. Have been out a lot over the last week, and have toilet trained my 2 1/2 year old - she’s done fantastically well, with no accidents so far.
Have had 1st TAX today and feeling ok so far. Will rest as much as poss. OH being really good, so will make hay!
HI KInden - glad to hear things bit more positive -
Would be nice here if august had less rain!!! My girls are off to pony camp next week - which handily ties in with me having chemo on friday so no one but myself to worry about next week - really nice - but i will miss them you get used to having them around especially in th evevnings. but dont tell them that! Looking forward to being able to go cross country with them on the thursday. So am off now to docs to get bloods done…lets hope they are better at it this time …!! then off to work.
Have terrible diaorrhea on TAX, opposite to FEC, started at 2am! This morning, I sent OH out for some Immodium and he got IBS relief - how complicated can it be.
Pony camp sounds great, and great timing for you too - hope your bloods are ok and they find a vein easily. My bloods were massively up yesterday, but that is because on TAX you have steroids starting from 24hrs before treatment.
Are you having to work more cos OH isn’t pulling his weight, or is it just a busy time for you? Don’t overdo it mate, get the chemo overwith.
I know what you mean about missing the girls. I am dreading my radiotherapy, as I have to fly to the UK on a Monday morning and back on Friday night for mine, and the worst part will be the separation from my girls, and worrying about whether they are being left to their own devices too much of the time. Am hoping that one of the weeks will be half term so that the family can come across with me - don’t want to disrupt eldest’s 1st term at primary school.
I don’t know if you’ve read the thread about Odyssey holidays for cancer patients, but I’m thinking of applying next year as I don’t really feel that I’ve had the time and space to deal with my own feelings about having bc as you always have to cope for everyone else too, and there’s always so much to do with young children.
The radiation bit sounds awful…dealing with airports as well!!!
I’ve got more work on and OH’s plastering is quiet…being both self employed is a nightmare sometimes but does have its benefits most of the time. But August is holidays so folks arent having as much home improvements…hes got loads of work in Scotland but even though he can be an inconsiderate pain…I would rather he was around just in case…
So Im doing as much as possible in the good weeks…but nothing next week…at least then the moneys in the bank…Its go to be done… I’ve actually enjoyed it my brain seems to be working still!!
Whats the Odysseys holiday? will have a look.
Had bloods done at docs yesterday …my veins really dont like giving it up…mind you if i cut myself i’d bleed…anyway we got some so hopefully its enough…Just got to wait at home now for chemo unit to ring and tell me results ok for tomorrow.
Then off to drop girls off with the horses so they can ride and i’ll go off to do a clients payroll. Get some shopping before tomorrow or there wont be anything easy to cook & eat over the weekend. At least today the rains stopped…for how long ? When will we get a summer?
SO where do you live ? if you dont mind me asking if you have to fly to Uk for rads?
I agree it must be harder with young children especially as cant take it on board or necessarily understand why you aren’t feeling good. At least with older girls we can talk about things and they are very helpful (most of the time)
and you do need an outlet…I’ve got some really good friends which does help.
I know what you mean about being self employed - I was for 10 years. There are great things about it, with some bumper months of income and to a large extent the opportunity to choose when you work, but others when it’s not so good and there can be lean periods of work. I must say that I like knowing what’s coming in each month these days,and enjoyed the maternity pay (although it was only 6 weeks full pay 1st tiime and 3mths full pay 2nd time, it’s better than what I woudl have got) and now I have 6mths full sick pay then 6mths half pay if I need it.
Mind you , with house prices going as they are in the UK your OH should get lots of work as we see on the news that people are just not moving house over there, so hopefully they’ll be doing them up instead. I do know what you mean about having them round as well!
We live in the Isle of Man. Have been here 6 1/2 years and really love it here. Moved from 12 years in London so it was a massive change of pace. It’s not part of the UK or the EU for most purposes, and has a fab tax system!!! We have most medical facilities here, but no radiotherapy suite, and the chemo suite in our new hospital overlooks our new crematorium and new hospice but is right next to the maternity ward, so you get the while circle of life there! I’ll have rads at Clatterbridge in Birkenhead and our DHSS will pay for somewhere for me to stay.
I do have good friends here and in the UK. I obviously don’t see the UK ones all that much now, and the local ones are mostly ones I’ve met through having the girls, so they have young children themselves, but they have been brilliant and really helpful with looking after them and me. But no one who isn’t in what we are can fully appreciate how it feels to have bc. Don’t get me wrong, I like to do normal stuff and forget about it as much as poss, but there are times when I consider my prognosis.
Still got mega diarrhoea but head not nearly as fuzzy as FEC. Have finished the steroids now so the tiredness might kick in a bit later. Am having a rest this am as OH has taken girls to dentist!!!
Hope your bloods are fine and you can have mobile chemo on Friday
Hope you got some worthwhile rest…
I got to go to Cheltenham…not the mobile bus …cos its broken down!!! How i could scream!!! Apparently my bloods results are borderline? Not quite sure why? Maybe they tested the wrong bloss lol !!! cos i feel fine…but at least my Onc has agreed i can have the treatment…downside is its at the hospital…am told i wont have to wait all day…ummm ill believe that when it happens…what this space is all i can say.
i know what u mean when you have times when you think what if…i’m sure we all do it we wouldnt be human…
I tend to have that more in the week after treatment…your mind wanders when you’re tired again or feeling sick again…
We had some sunshine today… what a difference that makes.
London to Isle of Man …big difference…
I lived in London for 3 years when studying (my family is from London but i only lived there until 3) loved it - but do prefer bringing family up here in the Forest of Dean… Dont get me wrong i miss bits…so go for weekend fixes a couple of times a year and see friends. I am def more of a country person - love being outdoors.
Well hope the rest of week and weekend goes well -
He didn’t manage to get either of them in the dentist’s chair. Furious!
Had terrible night where I was up to the youngest twice and eldest once then 4th time OH finally got up. Tiredness has really hit in today and everywhere hurts. Found it hard to breathe at one point this morning, but that seems to have passed.
Hope you’re back nice and early from chemo and get great rest with your brood away. I’m off to bed soon.