Hello everyone. I’m new to this site and i have grade 3 breast cancer that is aggressive and thrives on my hormone estrogen.
I’ve recently had a lumpectomy and was due to start my chemo. The only problem was that the day before my chemo, i found out i was pregnant! Mixed feelings was the understatement of the year!
My partner is livid that i’m not demanding a termination immediately. But the way i see it is that after my treatments, i’ll be unable to have any more children. Ok, i have a daughter already, but surely as i’m nearing the end of my first trimester, i can still recieve my treatment.
My oncologist says that if i continue with the pregnancy, then i’ll have a 30% chance of suvival. But if i have a termination and have my chemo straight away, then my chance rises to 80%.
Can anyone tell me if they have had an aggressive grade 3 type breast cancer who found out they were pregnant, kept their baby, went on to have their treatments and lived long, healthy lives?
Any advice or experience would be more than helpful right now.
Thankyou
Hi Bikerbabe,
Sorry, I have not been in your position, but I felt soooo bad for you reading your post. Obviously, I would not dream on commenting on what you should do, as that is a very personal choice, but I had Grade 3 cancer (diagnosed Jan 07 aged 34) and had chemo, mastectomy and rads. I was also told that chemo would make me infertile, but my periods returned and I AM fertile again (just to let you know)
I had 4 x FEC and 4 X Taxotere if thats any help.
Thinking of you and sending big hugs
Katyxxx
Thanks lily0, your support means alot to me.
Biker
What a dilemma - unbelievable- just wanted to send you best wishes and say a couple of things you could think about-wouldnt dream of ‘telling’ you anything.
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you could think about a second opinion - certain chemos do not go through to the developing baby, but this may depend on the stage. I dont know anything about this but you could do some searches
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statistics are just stats - they dont tell you your outcome - i had a 90 percent chance of a cure and i have secondaries, i would be wary of thinking your onc can give defnite figure
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your body gets huge shot of estrogen in pregnancy - its not a great idea to be pregnant with newly diagnosed breast cancer- my surgeon told me minimum 2 years clear is what they suggest
good luck and best wishes
cathy
Gosh, what a dilemma. I guess you definitely have to think about what your husband wants as well. I don’t have any children and I am not sure about getting pregnant in the future either. I have read stories on this site about people who went on to get secondaries after a pregnancy and it has definitely made me cautious. Of course, I would love children but if I was to develop secondaries or die, I don’t know how fair it would be to the child I would leave behind. Such a hard decision for you. I really feel for you. Good luck and best wishes, teacup x
Hi Bikerbabe
It sounds like you’re having a pretty difficult time at the moment. You may fine the BCC fact sheet ’ breast cancer during pregnancy’ helpful to read. It can be found by going to the following link
breastcancercare.org.uk//docs/breast_cancer_during_pregnancy_0.pdf
Also, if you feel you need to talk to someone in confidence then please give the helpline a call, the staff here are all either breast care nurses or people who have personal experience of breast care issues. The number to call is 0808 800 6000 the lines open Monday to Friday 9am - 5pm and Saturdays 9am - 2pm.
I hope this is of some help to you.
Kind regards
Sam
BCC Facilitator
Thanks Sam. I’ve sent an e-mail to one of your nurses in the hope that they can help me. Thankyou for your support.
Bikerbabe
Hi Bikerbabe,
So sorry you are facing this terrible dilemma. You must be quite young and you have a daughter to think about so you must think of your health first as you are not much good to a baby if you become very ill.
I know two ladies who have become pregnant and had healthy babies after Chemo.
I,m sorry if this sounds harsh and nobody can make this decision. I would speak to your Onc at length about other options available.
Best of luck to you whatever you decide.
love Andrea xx
Hi Bikerbabe
I’m so sorry you find yourself having to make these choices.
This also happened to a friend of mine, she was 12 weeks when she was diagnosed, and was given similar prognosis to yourself. Sadly, it’s the toughest choice she ever had to make, but she terminated the pregnancy and is now 12 months from diagnosis.
Her rationale was that she needed to be here being a Mum to the daughter she already has, rather than risking everything for a child not yet born
Love & hugs for your decision, Rebecca
Thankyou Katherine M and Teacup,
I’m trying to think of what’s best all round.
It’s a little difficult at the moment as my hormones are all over the place and my maternal instincts are screaming at me to keep my baby.
I’ve sent an e-mail to one of the forum nurses in the hopes that they can help me and maybe make things a little clearer for me. I’ve also been on a few websites that state that i can start my chemo in my second trimester which would be next week.
I don’t really know what to do but thanks so much for all your support. It means alot to me.
Bikerbabe (Julie)
xx
Hi Bikerbabe,
I was in exactly the same position as you about 18 months ago - I now have a beautiful healthy baby boy who just had his 1st birthday and I am fit and healthy and fighting this cancer!!!
I was diagnosed with grade 2, ER & HER2+ breast cancer in April last year. Two months later I then found out I was pregnant! I had assumed that the reason why I hadn’t had a period for months & was feeling so rotten was as a result of my earlier miscarriage and my diagnosis of cancer. It was only when I went for IVF testing (I too was hoping to preserve my fertility as I had heard that chemo may make me infertile) that I was told I was 14 weeks pregnant!!
At the time of my diagnosis I was told by my onc that if I was pregnant at that time then I would have to have a termination as their first priority was to treat me and my cancer. A few months later, after finding out I was pregnant I then spoke with all the professionals about my situation and not one of them suggested that I should have a termination. As far as they were concerned, as I had passed the 1st trimester, there was absolutely no reason why they couldn’t treat my cancer and still keep my unborn baby safe. So at 18 weeks pregnant I had my 1st of 4 chemo sessions. As all the professionals were very confident that both me and my baby were safe, we were prepared to continue with the pregnancy. I had regular checks and scans. Yes, I felt rotten throughout the chemo but my baby was safe and as I say he is bright and healthy and is showing no signs of having been through chemo with me.
As far as my health is concerned - who knows what will or won’t happen in the future. I have heard and read so many stories and thoughts and opinions on breast cancer & pregnancy and whether there is a connection that I have come to the conclusion that I don’t think the professionals can even say what causes it, if there is a connection, what survival rates and chances of reoccurence are. I think each person and their cancer is so unique, I don’t think there are ever 2 cases that are the same.
Since having my baby last Christmas, I have had radiotherapy and am still on 3 weekly herceptin treatments and tamoxifen tablets. As far as I am concerned I am fit and healthy and am fighting this disease. I have no idea whether I will suffer again in the future, and if I do will it be because I’ve just had a baby? Is it genetic? Or am I just damn unlucky? I must admit though that I am seriously considering whether I would risk having any more children in the future, I have heard too many stories about secondary cancers.
I think the most important thing is to do what is best for you AND your partner, and your future wishes and happiness together. I know how hard a decision it is for you, but if it’s what you really want, I suggest you do some research, talk with the professionals, you don’t necessarily have to have a termination!
Good luck xx
Thanks Andre68,
I’m 34 years old so i don’t consider myself to be that young! lol
I’m trying to think of what would be best all round.
Still confused but hopefully some more chats with my oncologist will help to clear things up
Bikerbabe
x
Thanks Mum2two,
I’m trying to think of what’s best for all of us, but with my maternal instincts screaming at me, it’s making things a little difficult.
Hopefully i’ll come to the right decision soon.
Thanks for your support
Bikerbabe
x
Thanks MrsJuB,
I’m glad i have at last found someone who has gone through what i m going through, even though my cancer is grade 3. I don’t feel so alone anymore.
The only professional i have spoken to are my oncologist, breast care nurses and my chemo nurse, who all suggest a termination. I have an assessment with my gynaecologist on Wednesday, so i don’t know what to expect. What other professionals can i talk to?
I’m trying to think of what would be best for my daughter as well as my partner and myself. But if i do decide to go through with this pregnancy, it will be for the last time. I don’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth and push my luck too far! lol
Thanks for your support.
Bikerbabe (Julie)
xx
Hi Julie,
I spoke with several oncologists, one who “specialised” in dealing with pregnant women, a midwife and also a highly experienced obstetrician and not one of them even hinted at anything but carrying on with the pregnancy, they were all very supportive. My breast care nurse even sent me a newspaper article about a women who had been in exactly the same position although she had been advised to terminate and went to professionals in America and other parts of the world for second opinions.
I appreciate that you are in a particularly difficult situation as you have your daughter to think about. As I mentioned in my earlier post, I don’t know whether I want to “risk” any reoccurances by choosing to have another baby in the future. But then again, who knows if becoming pregnant again will increase my risk? It is just so difficult not knowing what will or won’t happen. If we had answers about this disease and how it works it may make it a little easier to deal with but unfortunately it is such a huge uncertainty.
I wish you lots of luck, I often read posts on this forum so I am here if you have more questions. And I know you will get lots of support from other women on here. Let us know how you get on.
Take care, Julie xx
Hi Bikerbabe,
when i was first diagnosed with BC over 17yrs ago my kids were 6 and 8, i went on to have chemo and radiotherapy, we were advised under no circumstances for me to get pregnant my cancer was grade 3 quite aggresive and hormone neg. My consultant advised my husband to have a vasectomy which he agreed on and my doctor performed, everything went ok but about three months after all my treatment was finished i found myself pregnant again, my husband was tested and it was found he had had an infection and one of the tubes had knitted back up again so it was a very big shock (he went on to have a 2nd vasectomy) and also a very emotional one because i thought i could go on to have the baby i was only 31 at the time and was looking at prams and all baby things, but as soon as i spoke to the doctors my gp ,consultant,oncologist and gyneocologist all strongly advised a termination, i was gutted but i decided they knew better and all i could think about during this confusing time was the fact my two young children needed me and i felt i had to agree with the medics to protect them as much as i could, i thought if i have the baby, then die not only am i leaving two young children with their dad but also mabe a very young baby and i could not do that, i felt my husband already had enough to cope with. Don,t get me wrong the feelings for the baby i didn,t get to keep have never left me and i alway,s wonder what if but i felt i made the right decision at that time, i know what you are going through and it will be tough for you whatever you decide but you must think everything through and although it is your ultimate decision you need to listen to your husband also as he is probably really worried about you.
reneexx
i also have to say advice may have changed a bit since then, but i got 16 good years out of it before out of the blue it came back.
reneexx
Thanks MrsJuB, I’ll keep you all informed how i get on Wednesday and i’ll definately be asking my oncologist to refer me to the cancer specialist who deals with pregnant women at the Royal Marsden Hospital in London.
Thanks for your help.
Bikerbabe
XX
Thanks Renee,
I’m not taking this lightly as i’m greedily looking for every single bit of information i can so as to make the right choice. But ultimately whatever i decide will be the best for all three of us and not just for myself.
Thanks for your support
Bikerbabe
x
Good Luck whatever you decide i will be thinking about you.
Reneexx