Janey and Beth, just love the pictures, that is so funny! I never used to take my bra off in the evenings, but now it’s a habit. I don’t quite understand why the band of my bra seems too tight now, maybe my ribs have spread lol!
Right folks
I am signing off for the night, might not be on tomorrow as I am at work, then back for a while before going out for the evening, so if you dont hear from me dont worry I’ll be back on Thursday
Helena xxxx
Night Helena, have a good day tomorrow lv Clair xxx
Hey, morning all, 7.30 am here & goodness what a lot has happened since I went to bed.
First of all, brilliant news about your results, Sue,what a relief & your onc sounds so reassuring.
So good to hear about your scan results too, Ruby.
loads of love to all & hope you all have a brill day!
Off to Sydney later!
ann xxx
Morning lovelies, hope everyone has a good day, catch up later lots of love xxx
Morning glories. A quick hello as off to a full day - meetings what joy! Treat later, as reflexology booked at cancer centre. Love to you all xx
Hello hello hello from a sedate and serene lady bowler
I am only touching base to say hi as I am going out later for my celebratory meal with my work colleagues so wont be back on til later
Hope everyone is well, Ann have a lovely time in Sydney, dont forget the pics xx
I have been behaving myself today, had a MUCH better nights sleeps and actually woke just before the alarm went off instead of it waking me up which was good, even had comments on the fact that I was not haring around so all really good
Catch you laters peeps
Helena xxx
Hiya, I’m glad you’ve had a good day today Helena have a fab evening.
I’m seriously thinking about my future at work. I’m totally exhausted came home and cried. Only 2 more weeks and I get a week off xxx
Hope everyone has had a fab day
xxxxxxxx
Evening all! Clair a hug to you. I’ve just finished for the day. Whacked and weepy but bizarrely feeling it was an achievement to make it through. We were invited for tea, cake and photos at County Hall to celebrate our award and had a massive hot flush while pics taken! Now sat calmly waiting for reflexology.
Ann are you going to the Rocks in Sydney? That was one of the best things we did, especially the little museum.
Lesley how did you get on today? I’m too addled to name checkall if you, but it’s very reassuring you’re out there xxx
Clair maybe we need a new pact! Just heard I’m definitely into genetic testing and for Cowden Disease/syndrome. Now just need to let family know I’m being tested, so they’re prepared for results. Still hoping will be nothing. Xx
Thank you lovelies xx
Sue I’m a special needs teaching assistant and I work with little ones with severe autism, global delay profound physical and additional needs, we have 9 children in the class and a team of 5 adults, it sounds like a lot but some children are 2 to 1 especially when we’re doing transitioning between areas in the school and personal needs etc I was very lucky I didn’t have chemo and
I finished rads at the end of November so really I should be fine.
I’ve always loved my job and thrived on being hectic and in the thick of things. I also did a lot of 1-1 theraplay work which I’m totally passionate about.
I too get very frustrated with myself because I haven’t got the energy I had. I know it’ll come back but sadly our teacher has been away and 2 of the team just don’t pull there weight making it more work for the rest and I know that they worry about me so I feel even more guilty I even said yesterday I was struggling.
I’m totally full of guilt at the moment for my hubby and family and now work!
I’m going to see my boss tomorrow and have a chat and hope my teacher will be back soon.
I always knew it was going to be a challenging job but Its so rewarding.
Sorry for ranting on 
xxxxx
Janey, yep we do need a new pac 
I really hope it’s nothing too, sending you much love xxxx
Oh Clair, feel for you, wonderful to have a job you love and that’s so rewarding but it must make it harder to just to say, ok. I’m standing back a bit and not giving 100% for a while. However, at the end of the day, You have to put yourself first, and much as you love it, things will still go on there if you take some more time off and get yourself stronger. Easy for me to say I know, just feel for you struggling, I know I am, and I haven’t got to go to work.
Thanks Janey, counselling session went well. I cried even though I was determined NOT to! They really know how to get you to open up and let it all out don’t they? I was ok until she wanted to know about my family and my siblings and when I mentioned my eldest late sister that was it! I told her that friends I have made since losing her dont even know about her as I find it so painful though I think about her everyday. Think I must have looked like Alice Cooper after with mascara running down my face. Oh to be one of those women who look pretty when they cry.
Had a message from my friend saying she’s made it through dry January, I congratulated her and told her I’d just made it through dry February, though as I’m halfway through a glass of vino it’s lucky it was an hour ago or I couldn’t have said that xx
Sue
I’ve just read the link and yep some of it I’d what’s happening now, I might print it off and show some of my co workers xxx
Thank you Dizzy. I did share it on this thread a while back… it just reinforces the strength of the friendship on here. One night we all opened up and found that most of us had lost a much loved person in the same horrendous circumstances. As I said, my friends that I have had for years that knew me at the time obviously know about it, but friends I have made since have no idea as it’s something I don’t talk about, which it makes it so wonderful that I did/can mention it on here. Not sure, but I think it was Delicious Delly that triggered the conversion off that night with her usual openness. Anyway, enough snotty weeping from me for one day. Feeling very relaxed after a very small Pinot Grigio. Phoned docs this morning to get an appointment for himself and now they ask what’s it’s for. Told them and they immediately gave him an appointment for tomorrow morning, pretty good, I was impressed xx
Oh Clair
I so understand where you are coming from love. Being back in work is so incredibly hard and so much harder than I expected. I think we put huge expectations on ourselves to return to ‘normal’ and perhaps we push ourselves too hard, too quickly.
I am my worst enemy and I think I’m pushing myself as hard as I am so that everyone else can see I’ve defeated BC and live up to their thinking that I’ve finished treatment, therefore I must be ok now.
Oh if only it were that simple. Physically I’m doing ok, mentally, work life is a real challenge.
I have frequent tears when I come home and on Monday I was ready to pack it all in. I am persevering as I know it will get easier as the weeks go by.
Dont be afraid love to speak to the school so they know what your limitations are just now. Perhaps your phased return needs to be elongated. After everything you have been through, don’t push yourself so hard that you end up setting back your recovery.
I’ll add a little pic…xxx
Lesley
dont worry about crying with your counsellor. It’s a safe place, where we can say whatever is on our minds without being judged or getting that terrible sympathy head tilt thing that people do. They are trained to deal with whatever we can say, and I’m sure there is very little that they haven’t heard before.
Every time I go I tell myself I won’t cry. As soon as she asks me how I am, the tears start even if all day I’ve felt OK. Monday’s appointment was the worst yet for me crying. She has helped me cover difficult ground with my relationship with my mum, and like you, some of it I haven’t said to anyone else for decades.
I hope your counsellor can help you with the loss of your sister. I can’t even pretend to know how that must feel so I’m sending you a huge cwtch and to remind you that we are all here when ever you need us.
Xxx
Lesley enjoy every soothing and hopefully delicious glut of that wine! I’m doing a quick pop in to distribute love and hugs. I’m caught up trying to reassure Mum she hasn’t necessarily given me anything while trying to not think I’ve done the same to my lovely girl! Xxx
Janey
this BC lark just keeps on giving doesn’t it. Just when we think we’re getting there, something else to get your head around crops up. Genetics is no ones fault, it’s just the we are made but how do you get loved ones to see it that way? So hard. I hope you get the emotional support you need while you go through these tests.
Big hug lovely xxx
Lesley that should have read glug not glut, although … You are wise women with great access to perfect pictures! Mum calmer now waiting for my daughter to call me back before I let rest of family know. I’m also enjoying a guilty pleasure - Greg Davies on TV. No idea what it is about him!! Xx