Hi everyone. Ive been following a few threads on here during the past couple of months since my diagnosis. I havent been brave enough to post anything before now. Not sure if it was fear, the unknown or just trying to process things. Im now 4 weeks into my 6 mths of chemo and trying to settle into a routine if well i feel well enough to do things.
Now im well into treatment my mind is spinning rather than settling. Struggling to sleep or think clearly. I have 2 girls, 14 and 10 and trying to keep things as normal for them as possible but finding it harder to not be so tired.
Any tips on how to get through gratefullly recieved
Hi @joast79 well done for reaching out. I just wanted to welcome you to the forum and say that you will get plenty of support here. I was not TN and didn’t have to have chemo so unfortunately can’t offer any specific advice on how to cope with it but I’m sure there will be others along soon to give you good advice soon. A sunny Saturday probably means that women with younger families are out enjoying the weather
I also wanted to make you aware, if you are not already, of the Breast Cancer Now initiative called Someone Like Me. It matches you with someone who has been where you are now with whom you can build a supportive relationship. You can find out more about it here Someone Like Me | Breast Cancer Now should you prefer a less public form of support.
I would also like to suggest that you see your GP who should be able to recommend local organisations that can help with some counselling services to help you get your head around what has happened. I wish you well as you continue your active treatment.
as tigress has suggested the someone like me option would be useful and also speak to the nurses too, I found joining the chemo thread a big help where we held onto each other and got each other through I was 45 when diagnosed tnbc in 2017. Take it a day at a time a treatment at a time, pace yourself remember to do things that lift you, anything, putting on a favourite tune, watching a favourite movie, enjoying a flower dancing in the breeze, a sunrise, a sunset, anything I found these helped me too. But for me the forum gave so much kindness and support and care and understanding it gave me strength during the wobbles hope this helps Shi xx
@Tigress Thank you so much for this. I will definately check out the link you sent. I feel that i will need some sort of counselling/conversations with someone at some point to process all that is going on in my head. I have wonderdul family and friends around me too but sometimes someone outside of the circle is needed.
@Shi thank you your message. I am learning to take one day at a time. It is almost too much to think of the long road a head in one go so that is defiantely helping. The sunny weather is helping to lift my spirits though and seeking those little lifts will bring me joy i’m sure.
Hi @joast79 as our lovely @Shi mentioned, if you haven’t joined the monthly chemo thread yet, it would serve you well to do so as there is much support there. If you started your chemo 4 weeks ago, this is the link to the March starters which you should investigate March 2025 chemo starters - #369 by stafford22. You’ll get through this but allow yourself the occasional down day, it’s impossible to be gung ho all of the time.
Have you signed up at your MacMillan at your trust for the look good feel better session? You could look into it and also other therapy sessions you are entitled too if you want to dream, shout, cry then you do that, you do whatever you need to do for you we all have our different ways of how we choose and chose to get through there are no right or wrongs, so be kind to yourself Shi xx
@Shi no i havent signed up yet. I am thinkng about it though. I have been cold capping however this weekend it feels like i may be putting off the inevitable as ive lost so much hair. Will definately start looking into all these sessions. I think once im out there and able to show people i have cancer i will feel better maybe? Still feel like i am hiding away a little.
friends who went through chemo same time as me who cold capped did loose a bit of hair but stuck with it and held onto their hair, if you do decide to shave hair off, you can ask your trust about a wig voucher, there might also be preloved wigs at your MacMillan at your trust that you can buy for a donation, I think others have found bamboo headwear comfortable. I used silk pillowcase when I lost my hair and also beauty despite cancer scalp care kit. Do please ring the number on here and speak to a nurse and look into the someone like me option everything in your own time be gentle on yourself, you are still you and when your having a wobble we’ve all got you, like an invisible bungi chord and bcn has it’s invisible safety blanket round you day and night Shi xx
@Shi thank you so much for taking the time to reply its so kind of you. I will definately use this forum for support and advice going forward. How wonderful to have a safe space to voice our concerns.
The threads were a lifeline for me those further along in treatments shared their tips and tricks and the Oct17 chemo gang I was part of we were one crazy bunch if you ever read our thread we still speak daily and we go away together a few times a year something beautiful came from something trying to harm us we would never have met without bcn and the forum and all that bcn supports everyone with everyone’s here and users from all over the world use the forum so there is usually activity 24/7 on the threads so reach out as much or as little as you need Shi xx
as tigress has suggested the someone like me option would be useful and also speak to the nurses too, I found joining the chemo thread a big help where we held onto each other and got each other through 
